Any new lyrics to add to this classic?

[mrmpa]

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[Scuba]

1. Nope, just this...

You'll know the song.



Well I ain't no rock 'n' roller
I'm just a common dude.
I once had me a girlfriend
She was an awful prude.

She wouldn't let me
Get inside her pants, no way.
She said the Devil
Was trying to lead me astray.

Ah, but fortunately
I have a key
To escape this chastity.

Hope you don't see me tonight
With my pud in my hand.
It may not be the best
But it relaxes my gland.

Won't you please tell the girls
I won't impregnate anyone.
No, I'm just trying to have me some fun.

Ho hum, my girlfriends a nun.

[mrmpa]

6. help me............

I don't know this.

[Scuba]

7. Here ya go...

[HopeHoops]

2. Dear Abby, Dear Abby, I'm stoned all to Jesus

The world's spinning 'round and I'm jonesin' on Cheetos.
There's dildos and narwhals all over the walls. FUCK YEAH!!!!!!1!
And creepy crawly things all over my balls.
Signed, The Bong Man.

[mrmpa]

3. Ding, Ding...........

a winner!! You is what you is and you ain't what you ain't.

[rug]

4. Dear Abby, Dear Abby, I lost an alert

I had no idea the damn thing would spurt
I hate being hidden, that damn horny kitten
Next time I'll be careful, I'll post about chicken
S i i i gned,
Transparent

[mrmpa]

5. Escellent!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! eom