We are sorry. All of our representatives are still busy.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

Please stay on the line.

[ailsagirl]

1. I don't even get that!

I'm told to hang up and try another time.

[Wounded Bear]

2. Your call is important to us...

[jberryhill]

4. Oh I hate that one

Remember running to answer the only phone in the house, not even knowing who it might be?

[jberryhill]

3. Please listen carefully, because our menu options have changed

Due to unusually high call volume.

Please wait.

Did you know that you can perform most transactions through our website, and save time? Please check out www.gofuck.yourself/now for more information.

If you would like, you can leave your number, and a representative will call your grandchildren back when they are old enough to vote.

[lark]

5. Yeah that last line would be telling the truth and they can't have that.

I called one co. that is extorting me 10 times over 2 weeks and no one ever answered. I held 6 times up to 1-1/2 hours, no one ever answered. I left messages, no return call. I have excellent credit and always pay for everything, but not this time. I am so tired of scammers taking advantage of the sick & elderly but they are not stealing my money. If this goes on my credit, I will enter a statement saying it's a fraud and see what happens. They are in TX, so not easy to sue from Fl. otherwise I'd have already filed a case.

[dixiegrrrrl]

13. there are 2 options in cases like these..

1 of them worked magic for me.
I found the company on Facebook...Twitter would also work but Facebook is a lot more "community" oriented.

Then I commented to them that I am having a serious problem with their company but cannot get anyone to call me/write/email me back.
Within an hour, a rep. reached out on Facebook, knowing damn well the whole world would be listening.
I was very careful to state only facts, best professional manner, and to thank the rep. profusely when the
problem was solved. ( whole world listening to me, as well)

You can also report them to the state attorney general, either Texas or Fl if they do business there too.
Normally this would work, altho a bit slower, but now, during lockdown, probably not.

[csziggy]

8. I really hate that recommendation to use their website

When 1) my internet is out or 2) my power is out.

How the HELL am I supposed to use their website when I have no internet or the power to use it. And don't tell me to use their app! My cell phone does not get a reliable signal inside my house. Without internet, I'd have to go outside, up to the top of the ridge and stand outside to be able to download the damned app and then use it.

This is NOT fun when it it raining or is 35 F and raining, or there is a hurricane or tornado going by. All of which have been going on at various times I have needed to call in about various outages. Not all at once, of course.

Oh - and now my electric coop has decided to abandon their live person system to report outages. The automated system does not work if you have more than one account under the same phone number - I have three different accounts for the house and farm. They want an account number or meter number. I can't dig out the account number while on the cell phone since I WILL lose the signal. The meter has about five different numbers on it with no indication which is the "meter number" they are asking for.

When a live person answered the phone, they could look up my account by street address and determine which was the house and so could report the outage. I'm hoping that the lack of real people is temporary and that after the Covid-19 situation is over they will be back.

Sorry about the rant.

[jberryhill]

9. I'm sorry, I didn't catch that

Please say your account number.

If you don't know your account number, say "I don't know".

[csziggy]

11. Tried that, the recording just says to call back when I have it

After a forty minute hold!

By the time I gave up, thw power was back on. There was a small tornado that went by the day before, but all we got were power flickers. The next day the power was off for nearly an hour while they cleared limbs and replaced transformers.

I guess I will need to find a statement and add the account number for the house to the card with their emergency number. Then I can carry it out side when I have to call them.

Maybe by the next outage I will be back in my library with the hardwired phone so I don't have this problem. And THAT is why I keep the hardwired phone and hate the wireless we have for the rest of the house!

[jberryhill]

12. I'm sorry, I didn't catch that

Please say your problem in a few words. For example, if you'd like us to send your bill to a new address, just say, "New billing address."

[gibraltar72]

6. But because of your status you are at the top of the list.

[True Blue American]

7. My internet

And phone have been off since last night. Sent my Son a text on my cell phone. He told me to unplug the box and wait 2 Minutes. I did that. Waited 5 minutes, phone and internet came back on.

Question should I quit paying the gouging companies and pay him?

[KY_EnviroGuy]

10. Meanwhile, enjoy our loud, distorted music of chalkboards and screeching hyenas.

KY...............

[diva77]

18. LOL!!!! So true!!!

[Phentex]

14. Repeat once. Twice. Seven times. And then they hang up on you...

even though THEY said stay on the line!

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

15. That reminds me: I have to call Social Security in a few weeks.

I look forward to spending time on hold. I hope they have good muzak.

My call will be answered in the order it was ignored.

[LuckyCharms]

16. Average wait times are currently 9 to 16 hours. If instead of waiting,

you would like a call back, please press 1, and a representative will be sure to never call you back.

[LuckyCharms]

17. Sir, I need to transfer you to our programming department...

They are very familiar with this problem, and they ceratinly will be able to help you out. Would it be alright if I transferred you?

Sure, go ahead.

Great, hang on just one second Sir.

On hold music...If you like pina coladas, and getting caught in the rain.....click...bzzzzz....dialtone.

[Lady Freedom Returns]

19. The message you hear on my phone

Satan, Lucifer and Beelzebub. Your soul is important to us. Leave a message and a qualified demon will contact you.

It's amazing how many people don't leave a message.

[Skittles]

20. do you know about / have you tried (pimps other products)

yes indeed

[Dagstead Bumwood]

21. I hate when the music stops

and I'm tricked into thinking a rep is actually coming on the line. But, no! It's just the %*$#@&! message starting all over again.

Dammit, play the music until someone's ready to talk to me! Anything else is just cruel.

[Tom Kitten]

22. Some music while you wait

For those of you feeling nostalgic for all the good times you've spent on hold