When the time comes, can I cremate myself on a cord of wood on my land?

[panader0]

I'm in Az. What laws pertain? Those steel tables at the funeral parlor are cold!
Besides, all my buddies would miss out.

[ZZenith]

1. No.

You will need some friends to help you.

[BamaRefugee]

3. Don't forget the permits and paperwork. Wouldn't want your heirs to be cited!

[ret5hd]

11. You don't know that.

[mr_lebowski]

4. That depends somewhat on the order of events actually ...

Maybe the 'time will come' when he's still ambulatory, and has prepared everything in advance.

[ZZenith]

6. Semantics, I know, but that would be suicide.

“ cre·ma·tion
/krəˈmāSH(ə n/
Learn to pronounce
noun
noun: cremation; plural noun: cremations
the disposal of a dead person's body by burning it to ashes, typically after a funeral ceremony.
"we chose cremation over burial"

[mr_lebowski]

14. I don't see how that definition technically rules out suicide ...

You can't have the flames be the cause of death ... if I understand it correctly

[ZZenith]

16. Ooooh! So some kind of time-delayed ignition scheme.

I like the cut of your jib, boy!

[mr_lebowski]

18. Exactly ... perhaps by means of some elaborate Rube Goldberg contraption!

Did you see this vid posted the other day? If not, check it, it's badass ...

Link to tweet

?s=20

[ZZenith]

19. Hmmmm... garage sale not getting a lot of customers, I see.

But really, love it.

Gotta love physics.

[panader0]

26. I quit smoking four years ago,

but perhaps one last Camel.....with gas.

[texasfiddler]

10. I appreciate your logic and almost typed something similar until I read your reply. NT

[BamaRefugee]

2. Why not help out the wildlife and chain yourself to the woodpile, to be devoured alive by coyotes?

Ashes, charred bones and teeth won't keep our beloved critters thriving!

[GemDigger]

15. It's funny you should say that. The expression on my son's face when I told him I wanted to be

food chain material. There is so much wildlife around here that all I would have to do is crawl 10 feet from the road and there ya go... food chain material.

He thought I was kidding but I have said it many times. They don't call me bear bait for nothing.

[BamaRefugee]

17. I see a bear or god forbid mountain lion at least 2 nights a week walking my dog.

It's as good a way to go as any and way preferable to a car wreck.

[Tanuki]

23. It's nice of them to walk your dog.

[BamaRefugee]

27. They do it in exchange for snacks. Fruit roll ups and Slim Jims!

[mr_lebowski]

5. If there's anyplace in this country that would be legal, it would be here in the Wild West (nt)

[AmyStrange]

7. That's actually in my will, except...

-

I've instructed my executor to have my ashes mixed with some good dirt, and then have some good marijuana seeds planted in it.

I've even come up with a name, Dave's Best!

Honestly, I wish I could be here to try the finished product out, but by then, I will be the damned finished product.
==========

[AmyStrange]

8. Of course you can. What are they going to do, arrest you?

-

You're already freakin' dead, unless you mess up somehow.

ETA: Be sure to keep everyone you love out of trouble, by having a big party for them far, far away from where you do it.
==========

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

9. Do a Viking-style funeral. Just be sure you designate a good archer.

[panader0]

25. Alas, I live in SE Az and there's no water here.

I know a good archer though.

[abqtommy]

12. I've worked hard all my life to avoid making an ash out of myself, but you just go ahead with

your own bad self*!

* Bill Cosby

[NCjack]

13. Be sure your fuel burn rate is fast enough to do the job before some

do-gooder neighbor gets to you with a fire extinguisher or even worse, the fire truck.

[Sneederbunk]

20. Self-immolation always attracts a crowd.

If you need assistance call 1-800- URTOAST

[sorcrow]

21. My brother in law was cremated.

My brother in law was cremated. Per his request, some of his ashes were loaded into shotgun shells so his friends could enjoy one last trap shoot with him. (Also in Arizona, for what it's worth.)

I think I'd rather be composted.

Regards,
Crow

[sanatanadharma]

22. Make it a religious rights rite

Convert to Hinduism and demand your right to your religious expression expressed in the ritual rite of passage from flesh to floating dust.

You will have the full weight of the Federal government and law that your religious rights not be impeded.

[Wellstone ruled]

24. You are allowed to bury

direct family members on your own land in Idaho.. As far as Cremation and disposal of Ashes. Brother in law requested his ashes be scatter in his Wood Lot on his farm. That we did. One Sister in Law wanted her ashes scattered in a Gold Mine. That we did. Mother in Law wanted her ashes dumped in the Creek on the Farm her and her Hubby first owned when they first married. That we did.

Got one more Urn to take on a Cruise to the Caribbean. That Sister in Law was a traveler.