# The DU Lounge

Related: Culture Forums, Support Forums# Just stop in to say I won't be posting much (not that I posted much),

for awhile. My husband, Jim, died in a traffic accident today. So. Things to attend to and rearrange. Life does what it does.

CAVU, Airman.

**152 replies**= new reply since forum marked as read

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#### underpants

(184,394 posts)#### nancy1942

(639 posts)#### LizBeth

(10,183 posts)#### Raster

(20,999 posts)#### 50 Shades Of Blue

(10,487 posts)#### tblue37

(65,837 posts)#### handmade34

(22,789 posts)#### MackinacBridge

(28 posts)#### CherokeeDem

(3,714 posts)#### regnaD kciN

(26,315 posts)#### CherokeeDem

(3,714 posts)#### niyad

(116,705 posts)family is here for you, however we can help.

#### stopdiggin

(12,023 posts)you do what you need to do -- and take care of yourself. talk when you get back. --- ---

#### catbyte

(34,978 posts)#### In_The_Wind

(72,300 posts)#### babylonsister

(171,313 posts)#### Wicked Blue

(6,305 posts)My condolences

#### UpInArms

(51,385 posts)I am devastated for you and am so utterly sorry ...

#### PJMcK

(22,284 posts)I'm very sorry to hear of your tragedy. In time, I hope you'll find peace.

#### blm

(113,550 posts)Our hearts are with you.

🕯

#### Backseat Driver

(4,503 posts)#### The Velveteen Ocelot

(118,138 posts)#### barbtries

(29,089 posts)I am so sorry.

#### dixiechiken1

(2,113 posts)My deepest sympathies to you and your family.

I am so sorry.

#### magicarpet

(15,154 posts)#### Fla Dem

(24,755 posts)#### dawg day

(7,947 posts)I hope friends and family are a help during this hard time l.

#### NNadir

(33,801 posts)I am so sorry.

#### KarenS

(4,347 posts)#### Hela

(444 posts)My sympathies to you for the loss of your dear husband, Jim. Take care of yourself.

…

I'm so sorry, sarge...

#### jpak

(41,780 posts)#### 3catwoman3

(24,649 posts)Please accept an on-line hug -

#### Wawannabe

(5,888 posts)Warm hugs

Take care of yourself!

#### Tumbulu

(6,386 posts)In such a shocking circumstance.

#### BlueMTexpat

(15,427 posts)to you and your family!

#### KT2000

(20,705 posts)I can't imagine how difficult it must be for you now. I am so sorry. Please tune in to Du if you need virtual hugs.

#### irisblue

(33,306 posts)#### ancianita

(37,302 posts)This is a horrible loss. We're with you knowing you'll do what you must. But when you need some virtual hugs, advice, help, we'll be here to do what we can.

#### littlemissmartypants

(23,625 posts)#### Marie Marie

(9,999 posts)#### WinstonSmith4740

(3,124 posts)I walked a different road, but to the same destination, and this was the first place I came to in the aftermath.

Please take time and **take care of yourself**. It's easy to forget to do things like eat, and sleep can be tough to come by. It does get better, and we're all here for you.

#### Karadeniz

(22,958 posts)Fall apart. Nothing wrong with that, but do try to take care of yourself.

Deepest sympathy to you and your family at this time of loss.

#### WinstonSmith4740

(3,124 posts)Totally true. Also, allow yourself to feel what you're feeling...don't deny anything. I tried that for a while..."He was suffering, now he's in a better place, his pain is over" ad nauseum, and it broke me. If you want to cry, cry. Rail at the heavens. Scream if you want. I found it helpful to have empty boxes around the house that I could kick. Friends and family will understand and be there for you and nobody else matters.

#### OLDMDDEM

(1,660 posts)I want to give you a hug. It's not much but all I can do right now.

#### pazzyanne

(6,568 posts)Sending prayers for strength for you, for people to help you, and healing for you and your family.

#### Ford_Prefect

(8,125 posts)Please take good care.

#### FailureToCommunicate

(14,182 posts)We'll be here when you are ready to return.

#### blueinredohio

(6,797 posts)Please take care of yourself too.

#### Pepsidog

(6,288 posts)#### blogslut

(38,280 posts)May you be well

#### AwakeAtLast

(14,189 posts)#### Sunny Daze

(209 posts)I’m so very sorry for your loss. Hugs and please accept my deepest condolences.

#### Kimber432

(74 posts)I haven't posted much either but I am so sorry for your family and friends with this terrible loss. Prayers...

#### lunatica

(53,410 posts)#### OMGWTF

(4,208 posts)#### True Dough

(17,981 posts)That's terrible news. Sorry to hear it.

I wish you great strength, but let the emotions do what they must for a while.

#### SunSeeker

(52,726 posts)#### SaveOurDemocracy

(4,403 posts)#### sinkingfeeling

(51,961 posts)#### Jim__

(14,233 posts)#### SergeStorms

(19,222 posts)I hope you have loved ones nearby to help you through this. Were always here for you, for what it's worth. My most heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

#### yardwork

(62,724 posts)#### Just_Vote_Dem

(3,037 posts)#### cp

(6,899 posts)#### Heartstrings

(7,349 posts)#### N_E_1 for Tennis

(10,287 posts)#### TygrBright

(20,882 posts)#### DemUnleashed

(633 posts)I am so very sorry to hear...my sincere condolences!

#### Granny M

(1,395 posts)Sincere condolences to you and your loved ones.

#### CaptainTruth

(6,909 posts)Sending virtual hugs...

#### murielm99

(31,039 posts)Many of us here have faced bereavement. But to have it so suddenly!

Don't hesitate to talk to us when you need to do that. Hugs, prayers, good thoughts....whatever you need.

#### cayugafalls

(5,736 posts)Please accept my deepest condolences.

#### lillypaddle

(9,593 posts)and your family. My deepest condolences to you. Don't forget to take care of yourself, and remember that DU is a great place to go for hugs and wisdom. May Jim rest in peace.

#### sarge43

(28,986 posts)Your messages mean more than I can say. They do help.

If I can get through tonight (still waiting for him to pull into the driveway), I think I'll be ok.

He was a good man who gave more than he took. I was lucky to have him.

Again, CAVU Airman.

#### orleans

(34,344 posts)family around you that you can talk with and lean on and who will just let you talk and cry, and even cook for you.

it's a huge change when we lose someone in our day-to-day because there is always that constant reminder in whatever you're doing to include them

just take it easy--take it slow (and i mean from decision-making to walking around the house)

sending both of you light and love.

we're here for you.

#### rurallib

(62,732 posts)#### DFW

(55,534 posts)It's my worst fear, too. My wife takes frequent long drives on streets and highways populated by maniacs.

I'm so sorry for you that my worst fear had to happen to you.

#### SallyHemmings

(1,847 posts)#### trof

(54,270 posts)CAVU indeed.

#### stuffmatters

(2,574 posts)#### qanda

(10,422 posts)My sincere condolences.

#### SheltieLover

(57,073 posts)Healing vibes on the way! 💕💕💕

#### Bluethroughu

(5,519 posts)#### MontanaMama

(23,674 posts)You must be in shock. I am very sorry for your loss.

#### duforsure

(11,885 posts)#### sazemisery

(2,608 posts)#### mnhtnbb

(31,626 posts)There are quite a few DU'ers who have lost spouses in the last year or two. Some will probably stop in on this thread with condolences. We're here for you.

#### Lars39

(26,158 posts)#### CaliforniaPeggy

(150,852 posts)We are here for you.

#### smirkymonkey

(63,221 posts)What terrible news. Please check back in with us to let us know how you are holding up.

My sincere condolences. May Jim rest in peace.

#### live love laugh

(13,820 posts)#### Pobeka

(4,999 posts)#### MuseRider

(34,284 posts)Know that we are all here for you. Thinking of you and sending loving and healing thoughts to you. Many warm hugs.

#### Evergreen Emerald

(13,076 posts)I am deeply sorry for your loss. Take care.

#### greatauntoftriplets

(176,283 posts)Please accept my condolences for your loss. I am so sorry to hear that you and your family have suffered such a terrible tragedy.

#### Solly Mack

(91,330 posts)We'll be thinking of you.

#### JohnnyLib2

(11,218 posts)You have a lot of support here; wish it could be more direct.

#### Laffy Kat

(16,462 posts)#### PA_jen

(1,114 posts)#### wryter2000

(46,888 posts)I'm so sorry. I can't imagine how you're feeling.

#### Totally Tunsie

(10,885 posts)What a terrible loss. I can hear your broken heart.

#### TruckFump

(5,812 posts)#### LisaM

(28,091 posts)I am very sorry.

#### Nevilledog

(52,241 posts)#### Tanuki

(15,007 posts)is one of life's most difficult passages, and having it happen so unexpectedly must be especially hard. I wish you the very best as you process this very great loss and begin to put your life back together. There will always be someone here at DU awake and ready to respond with compassion and encouragement at any hour if you want to chat. Peace and blessings to you, sarge43.

#### MissB

(15,851 posts)#### pacalo

(24,722 posts)Sending you vibes of comfort and strength, sarge. So sorry.

#### electric_blue68

(16,121 posts)Strength to you for it all, and to whom else that you're close to who will be grieving.

#### Coventina

(27,446 posts)and all your family.

#### sarge43

(28,986 posts)Last edited Tue Mar 2, 2021, 07:46 AM - Edit history (1)

Your kind words, advice and offers of help mean more than I can say. I love this place. DU is the best.

I can't sleep because the old brain keeps putting up fire walls. "What am I going to do with all his stuff??" He was king of the pack rats -- everything from cars to ancient manuals about repairing antique sewing machines. "How am I going to do this or that or the other thing, etc?"

Of course, the old brain is avoiding dwelling upon the reality of "I'll never see him again." In the morning I would find him at the kitchen table net surfing the news. Getting my coffee and sitting with him and snark, analyze or rage about what's going on. I'll never tell him again "Hey, the bees are out and the daffodils are starting to bloom." Him telling me the cardinal pair showed up. Just two old folk married forever getting through the day.

Yes, I will get on, but it will never be the same.

Thank you for letting me do a little virtual grieving.

#### Donkees

(31,729 posts)*The famous aviation poem written in 1941 by 19-year-old Pilot Officer John Gillespie Magee Jr, three months before he was killed.*

#### kpete

(72,386 posts)#### flying_wahini

(7,309 posts)#### DownriverDem

(6,401 posts)for your loss.

#### Wounded Bear

(59,523 posts)#### Blue_playwright

(1,570 posts)Please do post and vent and cry and lean on us.

#### sarge43

(28,986 posts)I'll lose it during his funeral at NH Veteran's Cemetery. I'll be in uniform and during Taps I'll have to salute. Guarantee the old sarge will have do everything to keep from coming apart.

Thank you for the kind thoughts.

#### Blue Owl

(52,637 posts)#### Freedomofspeech

(4,262 posts)Sending you love and peace.

#### colorado_ufo

(5,828 posts)#### turbinetree

(24,879 posts)#### Phentex

(16,350 posts)Will be thinking of you. And yes life does what it does.

Take care!

#### farmbo

(3,132 posts)#### BlancheSplanchnik

(20,219 posts)#### bluecollar2

(3,622 posts)#### onecaliberal

(34,558 posts)#### BobTheSubgenius

(11,673 posts)You know where we are, if you need us.

#### virgdem

(2,163 posts)#### riverbendviewgal

(4,269 posts)My heat and prayers are for you.

#### Texin

(2,624 posts)#### pandr32

(11,864 posts)I am so sorry. I hope you find the strength to navigate through it all and that you have support from family and close friends.

We are here waiting your return.

#### dlk

(11,904 posts)Sending prayers of comfort and peace to help you through this difficult time.

#### malthaussen

(17,430 posts)#### demmiblue

(37,400 posts)#### cilla4progress

(25,356 posts)Thank you for coming to this community for support and love.

Holding you in my heart!

#### cate94

(2,846 posts)RIP Jim

Sarge

#### c-rational

(2,743 posts)Deepest sympathies.

#### sueh

(1,840 posts)#### philly_bob

(2,423 posts)A beautiful thought, Sarge. Sorry for your tragedy.

#### sarge43

(28,986 posts)Like fair winds and following seas for sailors.

Thank you.

#### GreenEyedLefty

(2,074 posts)Sending you big hugs!

#### Irish_Dem

(53,678 posts)May he rest in peace.

CAVU into the Wild Blue Yonder.

#### marieo1

(1,402 posts)OMG,,,,,,,,,,,,Blessings to you and your family..........

#### Trueblue Texan

(2,601 posts)The last year has been full of this sort of stuff...sorry you're suffering more of it. Peace to you and your family.

#### yonder

(9,794 posts)#### myccrider

(484 posts)#### mountain grammy

(26,927 posts)#### JohnnyRingo

(18,952 posts)If you need a shoulder, we have many and they're broad.

Sorry for your loss.

#### Roc2020

(1,651 posts)#### hlthe2b

(103,999 posts)will have you in our thoughts today and well into the future.

If anything can help with grief, it is the good memories you have of Jim. Please let them bring you peace.