Scared my wife I got out the food processor, just go look at hand me downs

[Duncanpup]

She is so suffocating always with the adult supervision with sharp objects geez I’m 55 people. I cannot use the kitchen aide without her supervision and it is not even sharp , and don’t even let her catch me using the high dollar knives from the kitchen in cutting open cardboard when a package arrives. Two older boys growing up six two six one both coming in around one eighty dad six foot and and one forty five so we recycle clothes. I just scored a couple cargo shorts and polo shirts. Yet I still can’t do ham salad without supervision from my wife what the hell people.

[brewens]

1. Sounds like a wise lady. The food processor is sharp. If not for her, you'd probably

grab the chopper by the blades and maybe loose a finger.

[panader0]

2. I've been with Jeannie for 20 years starting when I was 50.

She is constantly telling me how to do everything in the kitchen. I can't even bag groceries right
at the store. I asked her--How do you think I lived to 50 and raised kids alone without your
supervision. She said it's a miracle.
ps, still no word from son Matt. We used to trade clothes for a while, I'm 6'2" and he's 6'3".

[dixiechiken1]

3. True story...

I buy cheap pans from Walmart for Mr. Dixie. These are the ONLY pans he is allowed to play with. And one time I caught him using my knives, (and yes, they are my knives in the same way all things Dewalt are his tools), to open a box. GAA! I thought my head was going to explode!

[lark]

4. When your kids start helping with the supervision, you know you have issues.

Hs s friend whose husband was a regular Crash dummy, always getting hurt, fell off ladder, splashed boiling water on himself and dog, burnt down the garage - so that even their son was compelled to "watch out" for dad and stop him from the danger when mom wasn't around to do this. He eventually gave up his projects and only then did son get his own place because it was finally safe to do so.

[Dave in VA]

5. During my childhood

my father, WWII U.S. Navy veteran, had an apron he wore whenever he cooked on the grill outdoors. It had printed on it, "I'm the Captain here and what I say goes! Just ask my wife, the Admiral!"

[Duncanpup]

6. I understand

[Diamond_Dog]

7. My boys and I call my husband

An accident waiting to happen. Because he is.

Don’t take it personally we just don’t want you to get hurt.

[Duncanpup]

8. Thanks

[MLAA]

9. Maybe she just really loves how you look with all 10 of your fingers?

[Raven]

10. Using the good knives to open cardboard packages????

No wonder you need supervision!

[csziggy]

13. Yeah, that is almost as bad as using his wife's good sewing or embroidery scissors

To protect my good scissors, I bought two packs of 3 for 1 cheap scissors that are scattered around the kitchen and house. They are for cutting open packages, cutting off protective paper for projects and so forth.

That didn't save my "chicken" scissors (that are used for cutting chicken for splatch cocking poultry) being used to cut branches in the garden! For some reason, the fact that there are good garden clippers in the drawer next to the back door eluded my husband when he grabbed the more expensive "chicken" scissors.

At least he knows to NOT use my sewing or embroidery scissors for anything. He doesn't dare touch them - and I have pairs that have been around longer that we've known each other. My sewing scissors are fifty years old or more - Mom bought them for me for my high school Home Economics class!

[MLAA]

16. Our scissors migrate

I find kitchen scissors in the den, manicure scissors in the kitchen, garden scissors no where near the garden. I’m expecting to turn on National Geographic and find an episode on the Great Scissor Migration at the MLAA household!

[Treefrog]

11. What kind of guy doesn't carry a pocket knife for package opening, etc?

Come on now!

[NotASurfer]

12. After he retired, my dad decided to make spaghetti one afternoon

He had, you might say, limited practical experience in the field. As in, every once in a while when mom couldn't do it and cash was too tight for the usual fast food items he otherwise relied on. His cooking accounted for almost all of the "stomach flu" incidents I remember as a child, although he seemed blissfully unaffected. In this case, knowing his limitations - and perhaps knowing his wife's preference that he stay the hell away from her kitchen after a botched knife-sharpening incident that left one of her favorites permanently dulled - he figured he would play it safe and follow a cookbook recipe to the letter.

Now, he could manage to fry up Spam for breakfast once in a while, and could fire up the grill and overcook anything you could throw at it (pork chops are supposed to be crunchy, aren't they?). But basic kitchen terms were always a foreign language for him. Nonetheless he worked through the maze of pounds and ounces, teaspoons and tablespoons, chopping and opening cans, and browning and simmering and boiling, and mom came back th find a house that, she said, smelled like dinner. And he even cleaned up as best he could! So she gave the sauce a taste...

You know immediately where this is going. Long story short, he tripped on the "add one clove garlic, minced" step. He used almost an entire head of garlic, and augmented his sauce with some garlic powder to make up for the cloves already used.

Oh, mom fussed...but he did make her dinner, and he did clean up, and if she went easy on the amount of sauce, it wasn't bad. As she said later, with a shrug, it kept the vampires away the rest of the week.

So I would say, go for it, and that wiping things down and doing the dishes go a long way towards your penance for any transgressions you accrue along the way.

[elleng]

14. THANKS for this thread!!!

[whistler162]

17. Did you just shrug and say

they were able to reattach the toes the last time I used the food processor?