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Tue Aug 31, 2021, 08:40 PM

The rules of attraction - Older male division.

I hope people won't think this is too elitist. I just don't know how else to tell the tale.
Years and years ago I remember reading the diaries of the great literary critic Edmond Wilson. He had an entry where he expressed surprise that he remained sexually attracted only to woman his age despite growing older.
I think it's the same way with me. I'm in my sixties but I was out with my wife to lunch the other day and taking a good look at her face and think: She's pretty cute.
It's not just her. Before I got married I dated a girl who was a bit older than me
We remain good friends. She was a bit older. We got together for dinner a little while ago. She must be 70 but my first thought was: Wow! She's pretty hot.
It's not that I can't admire a pretty young girl but they don't stimulate me the way these two do. Obviously this isn't true of all men. Hello Orange Goofball and Jeffrey Epstein.
I have no idea why this should be. Any pop psychologists out there with a theory?
Just something I was thinking about because I don't have much to do.
PS now that I'm thinking about it, when I was younger I did have a few older women who hit on me and that was kind of scary. And over the years I've had a few guys hit on me. But basically when I was in college I became attracted to those smart girls who went to little or big Ivy League schools. As they grew older my interest did not wane.

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Arrow 14 replies Author Time Post
Reply The rules of attraction - Older male division. (Original post)
Tomconroy Aug 31 OP
elleng Aug 31 #1
Tomconroy Aug 31 #2
OAITW r.2.0 Aug 31 #3
multigraincracker Aug 31 #4
Mary in S. Carolina Aug 31 #5
Tomconroy Aug 31 #6
Irish_Dem Aug 31 #8
Tomconroy Aug 31 #9
Irish_Dem Sep 1 #10
Tomconroy Sep 1 #14
Tomconroy Aug 31 #7
Irish_Dem Sep 1 #11
Tomconroy Sep 1 #12
Aristus Sep 1 #13

Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 08:58 PM

1. OH GEE, DAMN you got me thinking, of an older MAN;

it's his MIND, ALWAYS is, but this one has/had a sweet smile, and twinkle in his eyes.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 09:10 PM

3. Interesting post.

I'm in my late 60's, but I also like women in my band (+/- 5 years). I think it may be partially due to the commonality of experiences. Maybe also the fact that, as we age, the exterior don't mean as much as the interior of the person's being.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 09:13 PM

4. After many bad relationships,

A counselor advised me. When I walk into a room and a female catches my eye, stay the hell away from her. Then go back and look at the ones you walked past. She was correct.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)


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Response to Tomconroy (Reply #6)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 09:52 PM

8. Your OP and this post are answering your own question.

Evolutionary biology suggests that men of all ages are attracted to young women who are fertile.

But sexual functioning is complex. Psychologists believe that sexual desirability may be shaped or conditioned by early sexual experiences.
Or even learned in the family unit.

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Response to Irish_Dem (Reply #8)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 10:03 PM

9. I think you are saying: I'm attracted to younger women

But maybe I'm not.
I think I*m saying those hot girls I knew when I was 20 are still very hot now that I'm 66.

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Response to Tomconroy (Reply #9)

Wed Sep 1, 2021, 08:13 AM

10. No I am not saying that at all.

I am saying early on you dated a smart, interesting woman with some maturity.
And one woman was older.

And even today that is the case, you like smart, interesting mature women.

Your early dating experience perhaps shaped you.
And perhaps your family influenced your interest in intelligent women in some way.

Also you are loyal and love bonded to your wife.



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Response to Irish_Dem (Reply #10)

Wed Sep 1, 2021, 11:26 PM

14. You're right, on reflection. I remain attracted to those

Very bright, very attractive girls I went to college with. As we've aged their allure has not diminished.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Tue Aug 31, 2021, 09:46 PM

7. I'm sorry someone deleted a response.

I don't mean to be elitist. My posts are just about me. I should just kind of shut up. It's a universal topic. I will shut up. Still an idiot.

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Response to Tomconroy (Reply #7)

Wed Sep 1, 2021, 09:14 AM

11. It is not common for older males to self-examine, especially in public. So it is admirable I think.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Wed Sep 1, 2021, 10:08 AM

12. Or maybe just kind of looney.

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Response to Tomconroy (Original post)

Wed Sep 1, 2021, 12:47 PM

13. Same here.

I've always been attracted to older women, ever since I discovered at the age of six or so that women were different from men, and I liked the difference.

At an age when men stereotypically start yearning for younger women, I remain solidly in the category of 'prefers mature women'. Any woman younger than about forty doesn't really appeal to me.

Naturally, a woman like Helen Mirren counts as a goddess in my book...

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