This message was self-deleted by its author

[mvd]

This message was self-deleted by its author (mvd) on Sat Mar 18, 2023, 01:33 PM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[SheltieLover]

1. Call social services, senior center, churches, & 211. Ask psych doc to waive copay

These orgs can arrange rides, food, etc.

[mvd]

2. Thanks SheltieLover

These suggestions are appreciated. I think mom’s insurance requires copay at time of service. I will try getting the place to wave it.

[SheltieLover]

3. There are community mental health agemcies that will likely probode service free

Might even give her meds free.

[mvd]

4. That sounds good. Her doctor gave the names of places and..

she chose the closest one. Maybe mention this to the doctor in the next appointment.

[MissB]

11. I'm sure the situation will get better if you do nothing now

Just ignore the issues, don’t try to be proactive or anything.

At any rate, following people’s advice here may actually work, but it seems you never do more than say vague “yeah, great idea” and don’t follow up.

Best of luck though!

[2naSalit]

12. +1

[XanaDUer2]

5. Have you contacted places of worship

For rides to food pantries?

[mvd]

7. Yes I feel they would offer one

If I need it I am more prepared.

[XanaDUer2]

8. It's been suggested many times

You really need to explore food pantries now SNAP has been reduced

[mvd]

9. Well this month is worse

Don’t want to go into it a lot but I am dealing with many things. I think I will save more of what we get - luckily mom still gets full payment.

[XanaDUer2]

10. All the more reason

If things are worse.

[BlackSkimmer]

36. His county provides free transportation to those who need it, just as mine does.

But for some reason, he's never wanted to avail himself of that.

[ForgedCrank]

63. they probably

don't come down his road or something something.
This is turning into it's own reality show.

[BlackSkimmer]

91. I know, right?

Some counted up all the gofundme threads and figured he had managed to glean over 10 grand from good and generous DUers.

Then there was a thread where he asked who was rich on this board. I found that quite disturbing on a number of levels.

Never mind that usually people with real money do not brag about it.

[XanaDUer2]

95. And some people told him nt

[BlackSkimmer]

97. Anyone can be have money on DU lol.

I doubt anyone with any real money told him anything. People with money generally don't brag about it, notwithstanding those social media posts from ignorant fools holding fistfuls of dollar bills. Lol, that TV family, the Chrisleys, were always bragging about how much money they have. Turned out not to be so true lol.

I suspect some were just yanking his chain and waiting to see if they'd get a pm from our persistent pal.

I've been here on DU for many, many years. I don't post or even read every day, but still, I have NEVER seen an OP where a poster asks others how much money they have/make. Most of us were raised to think that rude at best.

[Elessar Zappa]

6. I hear you.

The loss of SNAP benefits will affect me negatively as well.

[mvd]

13. Now I woke up sick

Weird stomach pain and vomiting and sweats. Can’t even get to urgent care. Can someone please PayPal me anything so I can get to urgent care?

My PayPal e-mail is [e-mail]

[mvd]

14. Updated OP for PayPal

Money would help us a ton. I would do a full fundraiser but am quite sick,

[XanaDUer2]

15. What's a full fundraiser?

Feel better

[mvd]

16. A PayPal one

Thanks, I feel terrible and don’t know what I have.

[XanaDUer2]

17. Don't you have Medicaid?

My doctor's office has urgent care clinics all over, and I live in a backwater, that take Medicare and Medicaid.

[mvd]

18. I do

I think it is Tower Health Urgent Care in fact but I have no money for a ride

[BlackSkimmer]

37. Your county has transportation.

You acknowledged this in one of your earlier fundraisers (not sure if it was a full fundraiser or another kind?)

Why'd don't you take advantage of that resource?

[mvd]

19. Still not good but feeling better. Hopefully it was initially violent and gets better

Sigh of relief that way.

[debm55]

20. Matt, when posters offered you suggestions to solve your problems, didn't you follow up on any. Heck

I followed up on their suggestions and got help for my son. And the messages were not addressed to me, Please follow up with a local church or charity. Good luck. PS. many, many people are dealing with a decrease in SNAP.

[mvd]

21. Yes and I have had a lot of good advice

Appreciate it a lot. I am glad you got help for your son. Sometimes situations are not easily solvable and if others need help for SNAP here I have no problem with them seeking any kind of help. I really wish I could give back a lot to people. Maybe someday.

[XanaDUer2]

22. You said you'd finally gotten a social worker

You *still* don't have low-cost rides?

DUers knocked themselves out, including me, to cull the many many local resources in your area, including getting a job.

But it's always. Thanks for the advice, I'll look into it, but I want cash.

[mvd]

23. Yes I did

The social worker checks in which is good for us. And I have not found a good source of low costs rides yet. I hope I do. Other things are better however.

[XanaDUer2]

25. Then get a new social worker

Because the one you have sucks if you're still food insecure.

[BlackSkimmer]

38. This.

I may have lost count now, sigh.

[RobinA]

77. TransNet

TRANSNET. TRANSNET. I am a social worker. In your county. You get MA. Transnet.

Plus, if your mother is getting help from county mental health she should be able to get a case manager. The case manager can point you to the best way of getting what you need. That's what they do.

[debm55]

40. Xana, while you were helping Matt, you help my family. Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

[XanaDUer2]

41. Your e always welcome

At least you listen. Many DUers have exhausted themselves posting comprehensive local-and- state resources (and there are many in his area), but , like clockwork, another fundraiser-for-cash pops up. This has been going on, at least, 18 months, and appears to have netted at least 11k in cash. That's a sweet deal with a minimal amount of work.

I gave $150 to this nonsense when I was working. I'd ask GFM for it back, but it's been too long.

[mvd]

42. There is a clear misunderstanding here

I don’t know why you get so involved in my threads. Every situation is different and it doesn’t seem to matter what I have tried. Always something more. I hate doing these too and mainly do these for my depressed mom who I love dearly. There is too much stress to get into it with you.

[XanaDUer2]

43. It's a message board dude

Stick me on ignore

[debm55]

44. Matt, maybe she got involved because she was concerned for you and your mom and wanted to help. I

remember all the work she did and it was alot.

[bluestarone]

45. I hate kicking this thread BUT

I fully agree with you! This person, in my opinion doesn't want help. Just money. I WILL NOT kick this again, hoping others will stop kicking as well.

[debm55]

24. Matt, I live in PA, so I know the process involved. My son doesn't get cash, but he does get SNAP

and Medicaid. He also has a Social Worker. If your mother has SS, then she can give you a portion, but it will cut into her amount. Going PayPal is not something to depend on. It's a quick fix, and then the problem returns. I am sorry about your house, but it might be better to downsize. Best of luck.

[mvd]

26. We both live on her Social Security

I am unemployed and applying for disability for the second time. I was previously denied for SNAP. I don’t want to rely on PayPal. It’s harder the first time without the extra benefits.

[debm55]

27. That's odd, because we did not ask for money or Snap. We just needed the medical coverage. The

Social Worker told us our son was able for Snap but not for money. We didn;t ask for it, she brought it up.

[mvd]

28. My mom applied for it and got it

I did not get it but I did get Medicaid. The social worker has helped for getting help for utilities and that is very good. Also is good to have someone who checks on our well being.

[debm55]

29. If you have SNAP ,utilities, and medical and you mom still collects SS and a pension, why would

you need a PAY PAL foundraiser. Did you tell your Social Worker your situation?

[mvd]

30. My mom's Social Security goes very quickly

It’s so frustrating. Plus the SNAP is going down. Wasn’t feeling good and don’t want to get into it more now.

[XanaDUer2]

31. Don't you need a C-PAP, too? Nt

[BlackSkimmer]

93. Social security checks are meant for the person who earned that money.

Not for supporting adult offspring.

[mvd]

32. Thread updated

I included the link. Feeling good enough to post it tonight. This morning felt terribly sick for some reason.

[debm55]

33. Wish you well, Matt. Glad you are feeling better.

[mvd]

34. Thank you!

I am not sure if it was a virus or something I ate last night. It was definitely violent with stomach pain and vomiting.

[mvd]

35. I'll kick and check this once a day

That shoukd be plenty for people to see it.

[MissB]

39. Call your social worker tomorrow (Monday) morning

Ask about getting rides, mention you needed to go to urgent care this weekend and couldn’t. Find out from the social worker how to access those. I know you don’t need it now, but you’ll need it again. Raising $ for rides isn’t the answer when you have a local county resource.

Also mention your food insecurity to the social worker. I guarantee you are not the only person in your area who is facing less SNAP $ this month. The social worker will have heard about it and can tell you which organizations in the community are stepping in to fill that need for folks like you.

That’s what you need to do. The magic money fairy isn’t currently available, as lots of folks are hurting.

[mvd]

46. Again I don't want to offend anyone

Each time I have asked has been a needy time. One of the fundraisers went to the electric company and my first one I was in a deep hole and should have put the money in Chime where there was no overdraft. I always use Chime for GoFundMes now. No one is perfect and I wish I could change some things. Also I am always looking to do more and really have learned. I wasn’t able to prevent the lower SNAP from hurting this month. I also want these to end after this unless it is really some unique situation. It has been very rough for a while and I greatly appreciate all of your help and advice. Will check again tomorrow.

[mvd]

47. Hi all

I called St Vincent de Paul today and it appears they can arrange a ride to the food pantry if needed. I used them in the past and they aren’t always available. So it is good everything is covered if the fundraiser stalls and my friend can’t come.

[mvd]

48. Kick for visibility

[mvd]

49. I'll see how this does through tomorrow

Thinking about taking it down after that. Remember that I don’t expect DU to replace the extra benefits. Just need this month. My budget is so sensitive to extra costs.

[mvd]

50. Thank you so much for the donation!

I appreciate it so much and it will help for sure. The donations allow me to stock up food for the month.

[Terryshine]

51. Nobody believes you

Mvd, nobody has donated to you. It’s more than obvious your “donation” is your attempt at seed money for this fundraiser . In earlier fundraisers , you claimed that some generous anonymous DUer would magically give you money just based on your thread. Everyone knows this is a lie.

You are a taker. A poor representative of the good people here. I suspect you posted this fundraiser (after claiming you never would again) after seeing other fundraisers here be successful. The problem is, those people were honest and in need. You “may” be in need but honest?

If your situation was ANYWHERE close to as you describe, social services would have removed your ailing mother from the house. All of those ER visits, no food, yet you claim the social worker just does nothing. That’s not how things work.

If this works out like the others, you will claim that generous donors ignore the signs that you’re dishonest and will donate to you. It’s your money being donated. Seed money.

The gravy train has ended for you. Stop embarrassing yourself and your mother.

[XanaDUer2]

52. I wonder if there's even a social worker

[Terryshine]

53. Probably no social worker

Maybe there aren’t any ER visits. Or impending foreclosure. Or anything else he’s said.

[Ptah]

54. Welcome back.

[demmiblue]

59. It is funny how obvious it is.

[Ptah]

61. Exactly.

[BlackSkimmer]

88. You obviously didn't pay much attention to her posts when she was here.

She had constant grammar, punctuation, and spelling mistakes. I noticed it because she always said she was a teacher, and I wondered if she was just bad at typing.

This newbie you are accusing of being her has an extremely different posting style, and I'm surprised you can't see that. Go do a search and read demtenjeep's posts.

Seems rather rude to attack a new member with accusations that you have zero way of proving. Never mind that I can think of several previously banned posters who have returned under another name.

Posting style, use of words, paragraph spacing, punctuation are all very easy to recognize in longtime posters. It's common knowledge that there are socks active here. I can think of five right off the bat, though I've not seen a couple in awhile. One always shows up when the sock owner gets under attack in a thread. This sock ALWAYS shows up then, but rarely otherwise. It's fun to track this kind of thing when bored. Posting style is a dead giveaway.

I had no problems with demtenjeep, though I thought she went off the deep end sometimes, but no way is the new poster's writing in ANY way like demtenjeep's.

[demmiblue]

89. And you obviously don't grasp the concept of people changing their posting styles to skirt the rules

Happens all the time.

[BlackSkimmer]

92. Oh, I feel certain people do that, and I have no problem "grasping" that concept lol.

But demtenjeep is not one of those who would be capable of doing that imo. Her posting style was pure her, and I really don't think she suddenly would become much more literate under a new name. Nah.

But hey, opinions vary.

[mvd]

55. I never claimed anything of the sort

Your post is full of distortions. No more discussion with you.

[mvd]

56. Deleting this due to no further discussion with one DUer

Last edited Wed Mar 15, 2023, 07:08 PM - Edit history (3)

The subject of this post kept it up. He is wrong about everything and frankly sounds like stalking. It is wasting my time posting to him. Fortunately most of DU has been understanding.

[MissB]

57. Have you contacted your social worker yet as I suggested upthread?

You’re not the only household in your city that is being affected by this. The social worker will point you to sources for food. There is no reason for empty fridges, especially since you found out that you can get a ride to a food pantry.

It’s disingenuous to talk about empty fridges when you have the resources to fix it.

[XanaDUer2]

60. Meals on Wheels was suggested many months ago

It took one 15-minute phone call with the Elder Services social worker for a full, hot meal to be delivered, including weekends, when churches and synagogues take over delivery. Protein, starch, veg, a piece of fruit, milk, and a cookie.

And, like I said, I'm in a purple backwater. There has to be something similar in his area

[Terryshine]

62. He's not calling anyone

How easy is it to just ask for money. NOBODY knows what he’s using the money for. Nobody. He can claim he’s using it on “Instacart” for food for his mother but maybe he’s using that money to buy Pokémon cards.

People are certainly free to give him their money if they wish. He never has to account for any money he’s received. Which now you totals well over $10,000

[Terryshine]

58. Nobody believes you

There is no way your educated father working for the government passed without making sure you and your mother were taken care of. The home you claim to live in has been in foreclosure for years now. And you claim to pay an attorney EVERY month to avoid foreclosure. Uh huh. Whoever owns the home would have lost it by now. But hey it sounds good on your fundraisers doesn’t it?

What happened to the money you received from the trust in 2017? Did you forget about that?

You can take photos of ANYTHING. it proves nothing.

The gig is up. You might as well find a job somewhere and earn money like the rest of us do.

[debm55]

66. Aren't you getting a little personal? You have 16 posts--a newbee. There are ways to deal with the

situation. I have not, will I donate as there are county and state agencies, However, I would hate for someone on a forum to throw things up to my face--personal things, that we in the Lounge have no right knowing unless the poster himself tells us. I don't agree with asking for donations, but you are coming across like an ass. This thread should be closed for obvious reasons, including posting personal info on a poster. Maybe you should read the TOS. We are smart enough to figure things out and they are legit. Personal info is not legit.

[Terryshine]

67. All of this was previously posted by mvd

It doesn’t seem to matter. His fundraiser is up to $30. With that money, he COULD buy food for a week. Dollar store sells dried beans and rice, peanut butter. $1.25 each. A dozen eggs $5.00. A loaf of bread $3.00. Couple cans of condensed tomato soup $3.00.

But you and I both know he won’t. It’s much easier to attack the messenger rather than face the fact that he’s just not telling the whole truth.

[Ptah]

68. Are you the poster formerly known as demtenjeep?

[Terryshine]

70. No. I am not demtenjeep.

[debm55]

69. It's not what you posted about the donations, but the way you included personal information about

him. That is not what they call fair fighting. Like I said, I will not donate, but I don't like the idea of knowing someone's personal history unless that person brings it up in that particular conversation--not one months or years earlier. On the one hand you are right, but on the other you are wrong on how you are going about it, .

[Terryshine]

71. Personal information he has posted HERE

maybe you’ve lost count, but he’s had SO MANY fundraisers that he probably forgets the reasons he claims to need money. It’s an easy search. It’s prudent before donating to make SURE it’s a valid cause, especially when the fundraisers are so frequent.

Look. This might be a “new name”, ( sometimes things happen with emails) BUT I’ve been around DU since the torchthewitch saga. I really dislike two things. Magats and people who lie to DUers.

[debm55]

72. I understand, I have been a member here since 2004, though I just read until this past August.

Last edited Fri Mar 17, 2023, 09:37 AM - Edit history (2)

Sorry I assumed you are a newbee. I just don't like fights. And everytime, this comes up, there is a long thread with some posts that are not so nice. Others have been more then helpful. All I am saying is state the facts that pertain to this issue without having it be a personal attack.

[Ptah]

73. What was you previous DU name?

[Terryshine]

74. You think it's demtenjeep.

You can just go on thinking that.

[Ptah]

75. What was you previous DU name?

[Terryshine]

78. My previous name isn't the focus

It should be on mvd and his mother and their empty refrigerator! He just seems to have the worst luck. Even with all of the government resources available to him, he still can’t find food for his refrigerator. Now he’s been told about another transportation service that will take him to a food pantry, but I’m sure there’s a reason he’s unable to use it.

He does have donations from this fundraiser totaling $30. As I outlined earlier, he could purchase food for a week with those funds. Or, he could purchase Pokémon cards. Let’s all hope he’s done that today so the refrigerator is no longer empty!

[Ptah]

79. I konw all that. What was your previous DU name?

[Terryshine]

84. You're persistent!

I guess you’ll know my former name “in due time”

[BlackSkimmer]

94. These posters should not be harassing you. I really dislike pile-ons here.

I remember TTW too. Boy, that was almost as fantasmagorical as this one.

[demmiblue]

90. greenbriar

[Torchlight]

76. Ironic closer. nt

[GP6971]

86. Aren't you special. n/t

[Skittles]

64. put that guy on Ignore

that way you don't have to see him / hear from him

[mvd]

65. Done

Thanks Skittles! I also reported the stalking behavior.

[mvd]

80. I'll leave this up one more day

I am very thankful for the $40 I have received. It will go towards food. I am most worried about the period when I used to get the $95.

I loved my dad and he was a very hard worker. He lost his job much earlier than he wanted and then got cancer and died pretty young. He did have a pension and trust but they went to the mortgage and he lost his job in his 50s. Should we have downsized earlier? Yes, I think. But mistakes get made. My dad certainly did not want us in this situation but we had a lot of bad things happen. My mom got older and depressed and I am not like the normal person my age because of my disability.

That said, there is no excuse not to try, and I have. I think I may have transportation to food pantries more readily available now if needed. Federal resources as many here know can’t always prevent problems. We need a stronger safety net in this country. But without the financial help and suggestions here, I would be worse off for sure.

For those wondering about my poll about how much DUers earn, I was just curious but I admit that was bad timing. I will be more aware in the future.

I know I said I didn’t want more fundraisers before but I truly have reached the stage I can’t keep asking for more here. If there’s some disaster it may be different, but no one would want that. So I hope DUers keep up the good vibes for me and my mom. DU has absolutely been more than generous and wonderful.

That is all I am going to say. I want to be known for my political posts and fun Lounge posts again.

[debm55]

81. Good luck, Matt. Please look into the ways and suggestions that posters have given you. It's there

for you as a safety net. There's a saying ---it is better to teach a person to fish, then to give him a fish when ever he needs it. Or something like that.

[mvd]

82. Thank you

The post about my dad from before made me angry because we were so close. His cancer was just awful for him and the family to go through.

[mvd]

87. Even though I can no longer see some posts here

I thought I should address the posts I saw before that. Most at DU have been great and I will not let it bother me. Night, all

[debm55]

85. No Terryshine, I have an adopted son with mental issues. You are coming across as not helpful, but a

bully. Question for you --how much did you give. Email me to the private inbox and I'll give you back your donation. Is that a deal.? . He says it will end tomorrow, I hope he is truthfull about that and will look into other avenues as his mother is not going to always be there. I will back up my word and give you back your donation. I will make it right for you. But remember, giving comes from the heart and if your heart wasn't in it, you shouldn't have given. Good night. I applaud all you posters who have reached out Matt with your research and help. and common sense. You are a wonderful group of people.

[BlackSkimmer]

96. Debm55, you're being very kind in this thread, pretty much to everyone.

But since you have a star, do yourself a favor and do an advanced search on this poster who keeps asking for money. Someone posted all of them a few months ago. There are a lot. One poster discovered he had managed to accumulate over 10 grand with these gofundmes. Just look for yourself.

Never mind that some years back he posted that his father had left a trust. My parents also left a trust. It's usually not chump change. He also posted that he spent recklessly on delivery food and maxed all his credit cards. HE is the one who posted this information. Many of us (especially those who donated) hate to see good money go to the reckless spending to which he so readily admits.

He has ignored numerous suggestions and or simply says he's "trying". A good social worker would have solved all or most of these problems a long time ago. Or at least directed him where to go for help, as many have done here.

Anyone wanting to donate their hard-earned money will hopefully think about Ukraine, or the awful tragedy in Turkey, or domestically, any cause in their own hometown.

[debm55]

98. Thank you Blackskimmer. I lent $1000 to a fellow teacher who was crying she had no money for

Christmas. I found that she was using the money to buy her kid gaming stuff. I guess I was taken. I asked for the money back, and she paid me back 50 a month. Will never forget as she got me fired after my concussion. So I only like to give money to reputable places. I thing Matt needed a person to oversee his incoming and outgoing cash flow. My husband has a trust and the trust is very specific on when he asks for money. However, what if he is right. He says he is disabled--he would not know how to manage money. I guess it's too late now to ask for a trustee to be manager. I will follow your suggestions to look further into the situation. I have a hard time wanting to believe that someone is scamming us. Or maybe I don't want to believe. Thank you for your suggestion.

[XanaDUer2]

99. Hi, good afternoon

A wonderful poster (tree-hugger?) wrote him up the most-comprehensive roadmap to local resources, it was stunning. Like, it must have taken , at least, an hour. Probably more. People commented on its detail. Even stuff about Tracphone!

But it was the usual response: great, thanks, that's helpful!

I donated money I desperately need now. I have a $2100 CC bill coming that I am, literally, physically sick over. This is on top of my $747 monthly COBRA. I'm losing that in a few months. The perfect financial storm of car repairs on an old car, vet bill, car insurance, expensive psychiatric meds, and doctor appointments. Groceries. It's more than I make on SS. My SO is paying bills, or I'd be screwed.

Thanks for your kindness to everyone!

[debm55]

100. I am so sorry for you XanaDUer2. I came back to DU in August when the thread was taken from the main

board to the Lounge. I remember all of the helpful suggestions given. In fact, I took some to help with the medical bills of my son. It was your post that helped me. And it wasn't a major ordeal. In fact, we didn't ask for SNAP, we just wanted the Medical issues. I will take BlackSimmer's advice and look up the what was posted. I agree 100% with what you guys are saying. I didn;t like the one poster getting into personal issues, because I would not want that done to me. It has in my personal life. Sometimes, I let my heart leed, instead of my brain. Also, I wish there was something I could do for you.

[ForgedCrank]

101. I can only

speak for myself, but my hope is that this is all false. As odd as that sounds on the surface, if there is an elderly mother who is going without food because she is trying to feed and support her adult son on her fixed SS income, that is a serious matter and is very concerning. All of the advice given has been a collection of awesome in itself, but it appears as if none of it has been leveraged ove the roughly year and a half these fund raisers have been going on.
I also donated money a long time ago, but I do such things in good faith, if it's ill gotten, that is not for me to pursue, that is left to higher powers in my eyes.
I believe I am on his ignore now ever since I suggested he find part time work last summer. I just really hope there isn't an elderly mother suffering because of all this.

[debm55]

102. I agree.

[BlackSkimmer]

103. Well, his name is known as well as where he lives. Others did this research, and many think that

perhaps social services should be notified about a vulnerable adult.

If it is not false, the poor mother needs help from someone who can provide it.

[XanaDUer2]

105. Thanks

[mvd]

104. I will..

keep this up overnight and into the morning - things still haven’t changed with needing food help. But as said, this is the last full day I plan on keeping it up

[XanaDUer2]

106. On one of your previous fundraisers

a user named PennRalphie suggested DUers send you grocery giftcards instead of cash. If ten DUers send you $5 each, that should be enough to feed you and your mother for, at least, a week. You've already gotten $30, and everyone would know that the money is actually going towards food.

PennRalphie asked you to post your email, which you did, to have DUers send you grocery giftcards. This should get you through the current need for food.