Okay Humor Me for Five Seconds

[BOSSHOG]

What do you call a clairvoyant midget who just escaped from prison?

A Small Medium at Large!


Okay, back to pestilence and decay.

[Permanut]

1. Go to your room.

[BOSSHOG]

3. That's where I keep my special book of jokes

[Permanut]

4. OMG there's more?

[BOSSHOG]

5. Thanks for asking

Why did Oedipus take Prozac?

Because he was a nervous Rex. Get it?

That’s your two freebies for the night.

[Permanut]

9. Oh Man, and I suppose you're going to be here all week.

[BOSSHOG]

11. Yes, But Sadly the week ends in four hours

Central Time

[applegrove]

10. That one is great.

[niyad]

2. groaaaaaaaan

[Mark.b2]

6. Good one!

I have a weakness for jokes about midgets and monkeys.

Joke #1

Did you hear about the midget who killed himself playing Ping Pong? He got too excited and ran off the table.

Joke #2

A little old lady had two monkeys for years. One day one of them died of natural causes.

In grief, the second monkey passed away two days later. Not knowing what to do with them, she finally decided to take them to the taxidermist and have them stuffed.

After telling the owner of her wishes, he asked her, "Do you want them mounted?"

Blushing, she said, "No. holding hands will be fine."​

[BOSSHOG]

7. Like a barrel full of monkeys

Music trivia. What song are these lyrics from?

My Old Man’s Drunker than a Barrel Full of Monkeys
And My Old Lady She don’t care

[FullySupportDems]

14. Saturday Night's Alright by Elton John

Love that one.

[BOSSHOG]

15. My occasional ear worm, thanks for the shared Memories My Friend

Elton and Bernie - Awesome

[FullySupportDems]

18. It's playing in my head now lol

I listened to it just the other day. So much energy.

[applegrove]

8. Midget is a term for a person of unusually short stature that is considered by some to be pejorative due

Midget is a term for a person of unusually short stature that is considered by some to be pejorative due to its etymology. While not a medical term like dwarf, midget long described anyone, or indeed any animal, exhibiting proportionate dwarfism.

https://www.google.com/search?ie=UTF-8&client=ms-android-bell-ca-rvc3&source=android-browser&q=midget

Applegrove:

I used that word once in my life. I just was thinking to quick and blurted it out. I struggle for words often. I blurted it to a psychiatrist.

[Brother Buzz]

12. I believe Carnac The Magnificent asked that decades ago

[CrispyQ]

13. Good one!

[dai13sy]

16. It's a groaner!! LMAO Thank you!

[BOSSHOG]

17. No. Thank You

We all need “a quite respite from the hectic pace of today.”