As some of you know, I'm a skilled craftsman. I made an axe. I'm not very smart, but I am skilled.

[LuckyCharms]

Last edited Tue Oct 7, 2025, 02:29 PM - Edit history (1)

[rsdsharp]

1. Why, that looks like my grandfather's axe. My father replaced the handle,

and I replaced the head. That’s my grandfather’s axe.

(Me and Dad was cousins, but we’s alright!)

[LuckyCharms]

2. Did he use it to chop up some metal?

Because that's my plan.

[rsdsharp]

12. No, but he kept the handle nice and sharp.

[LuckyCharms]

18. My doctor told me that I sharpen my handle too often.

So I got a new doctor.

[rsdsharp]

25. Smart man!

[TexasTowelie]

28. So your father's handle was hnasharp?

Sorry, but I couldn't resist.

[rsdsharp]

30. 71 years, and finally a Sharp joke I hadn't heard before.

[TexasTowelie]

33. Well, you did provide the setup for the joke,

I just ran with it.

[Bluestocking]

3. It's a beautiful axe

but next time make the handle out of wood and the axe head out of metal. I think you are smarter than you think and you already know that. The fact that you are on DU means your smarter than alll those Americans that did not vote for Harris.

[LuckyCharms]

4. Thank you, but I made the head out of wood because

I plan on chopping up some steel with it.

My concept here is that old saying "opposites attract".

[Wifes husband]

26. You understand it is a joke, right?

[badhair77]

5. That brought a smile.

Beautiful craftsmanship, btw.

[LuckyCharms]

6. I didn't really make that. I found the picture online. That's another one of my skills...

Finding horseshit on the internet, and then posting it here.

I did come up with the OP title all by myself though!

[badhair77]

9. Please, lake the complement.

trump would. He specializes in taking credit for others’ work.

[LuckyCharms]

10. OK then, but he better not take credit for that axe!

That thing took me several hours to make!

Thank you for your attention to this matter!

Lucky J. Charms
President of the United Axe Makers Association.

[badhair77]

14. Lol. There you go.

[malaise]

7. Too good

😀

[LuckyCharms]

20. Haha! Thanks, malaise!

[cachukis]

8. Oh the inanity.

[LuckyCharms]

15. What does Sean Hannity have to do with this? Oh wait, i just put my reading glasses on...

Sorry.

[cachukis]

16. Love it.

[debm55]

11. LuckyCharms, that hatchet is very beautiful woodworking. You , sir are very talented.

[LuckyCharms]

13. Thank you, Deb. But please see post #6.

[debm55]

17. It's a nice hatchet, or picture of a hatchet. anyhow.

[LuckyCharms]

19. In my entire life, you're the first woman who has told me that I

have a nice hatchet.

Thank you, Deb.

[Donkees]

21. ''The forest was shrinking but the trees kept voting for the axe as its handle was made of wood ...

... and they thought it was one of them.''


Then along came an axe with a wooden blade. They voted for that one instead, and the forest was saved.

[LuckyCharms]

22. What's that old saying? The axe forgets, the tree remembers.

[Donkees]

23. "An axe with a wooden blade remembers because it's part of the family tree."

[mdbl]

24. LOL

[Bernardo de La Paz]

27. Keep trying. You'll get the hang of it. . . . .nt

[Bernardo de La Paz]

29. Look at it this way: It's a butter axe. . . . . nt

[LuckyCharms]

36. That reminds me...

I also made a tree knife!

[Joinfortmill]

31. Cool

[Ford_Prefect]

32. That would be the famous Olneya tesota we've all heard so much about?

[LuckyCharms]

34. Yes, Desert Ironwood.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

35. They say that we learn from our mistakes.

Your axe is proof that you are very smart indeed.

Thanks for sharing!

[LuckyCharms]

37. As per Albert Einstein

'A person who never made a mistake, never tried anything new".

[orangecrush]

38. ...

[chowder66]

39. Lol!!!

[electric_blue68]

40. Ha! 😄 Was wondering what you'd "have up ypur sleeve", so to speak!

[LuckyCharms]

41. Just my arm!

[electric_blue68]

42. 👍

[LoisB]

43. Whoever did it, that is a beautiful piece of wood.

[LuckyCharms]

44. It really is. I've actually been studying that pic...

Trying to figure out if i could make that, just for the heck of it.

[LoisB]

55. Go for it!

[Niagara]

45. May I axe you a question?

Did you bury the hatchet or give anyone a spitting headache?

[LuckyCharms]

47. I'm an expert at giving people headaches!

It's another one of my "Skills".

You're punny!

I'm actually wondering if I could make that axe head.

This OP has me thinking about a replacement arm to an Adirondack chair that I made for a friend of mine several years ago. Took me several tries to get it right. Pic below, old vs. new.

[Niagara]

56. lol

How am I punny? I'm here to amuse you?




That's a spectacular job on the arm replacement, Lucky!

[LuckyCharms]

57. Just...you know...you're punny...

the way you tell the story and everything!

You got it all wrong, Tommy!

Whoa, whoa Anthony!

He's a big boy, he knows what he said!

Story about that chair arm:

That's wet treated lumber. I unfortunately don't own a band saw, and my jig saw would not cut that wood. It was having none of that! Also, my router was out of commission.

So I did that whole thing with hand saws to get it close, and then shaped it with the electric sander and some 60 grit sandpaper. My buddy and his wife were at a wedding the day I went over to his house to install the new arm. I knew his 20 something daughter was home when I was banging on the door, but she would not answer the door to let me in because I had not seen her in several years and she didn't recognize me.

So, I climbed over a fence with my tool bags to get into his backyard to install the arm. It took me about 2 hours to do that, because the rest of the chair was messed up, so I repaired it while I was there. He had about THIRTY talking gnomes in his backyard, and they were motion sensitive, so every time I moved, they would talk to me.

"Hey, what are you doing there"?

"Hey you, get out of here".

Imagine listening to that for two hours! So I was laughing my ass off and started talking back to the gnomes.

Pics below. Unfortunately, I didn't get a pic of the gnomes!

I hope you are having a lovely day!

[Niagara]

58. I almost had him! I almost had him!

Those garden creatures are always up to gnome good! They probably would have mooned you while you were taking their photos anyway!


I'm currently taking a break but it's a long but good day for me. I hope you're having a good day too!

[LuckyCharms]

59. I don't know about you, Hendry. You might fold under questioning!

What's that smoking emoji?

You don't smoke, do you?

Are you smoking weed on your break?

[Niagara]

62. You don't need three onions

No smoking here.


That smoking emoji was Hendry smoking a cigarette, not me.

[LuckyCharms]

63. Paulie did the prep work, and...

he had a wonderful system for doing the garlic.

That skinny guard is a real pain in the ass!

[berniesandersmittens]

46. What a hatchet job

[Ptah]

48. Strong like bull, smart like tracror.

[LuckyCharms]

50. I had to Google that one!

[Harker]

49. I would offer to help...

but it appears that you have a handle on it.

[LuckyCharms]

51. I did have a handle on it Harker...

Until I accidently cut off a few fingers with my wooden axe!

[Harker]

52. Whose fingers, Lucky?

?si=YtH1nKA09NgbrR0V

[LuckyCharms]

53. LMAO!

[Harker]

54. Gets me every time!

[3catwoman3]

60. I totally KNEW someone would post this most hilarious of TV comedy moments.

This clip is guaranteed to make me laugh no matter how many times I have seen it, and I've watched it many, many times.

[Harker]

61. I hesitated, having recently undergone hernia surgery.

Laughing comes with a price, but it had to be done. 🪓

[3catwoman3]

64. Laughter is good medicine.

I hope your stitches held up!

[Harker]

65. So far, so good, thanks!