The Insanity Files: Why I might owe my life as it currently is to a judge in Dekalb County, Georgia.

[Tobin S.]

Last edited Sat Nov 23, 2013, 07:06 PM - Edit history (1)

It's been a while since I've had a chance to write for you guys. But I've got a little time today and I've got the notion.

It was 1998 and I was 25 years old and in the middle of a decade that I like to call my lost decade. From 20 to 30 I lived with the symptoms of bipolar disorder untreated. What made that period of time especially terrible was that I was also suffering from psychosis. I don't know how I made it that long without getting into a lot more trouble. I did not know that I was mentally ill or I would have gotten help sooner. About 30% of people who suffer from mental illnesses do not know that they are sick.

I owned a semi at the time. I found myself in the middle of a hot summer with no air conditioning. Between mania and the heat I'd lost about 40 pound in two months. I was finding the heat unbearable so after I'd worked for a while and saved up some money I decided to put my truck in the shop. I was in Dekalb County, Georgia which contains the southeast portion of the Atlanta metro area. The guys at the shop found quite a few things wrong with my truck and told me it would be at least a week to fix it. So I rented a hotel room for a week and planned to take it easy for a while.

The first night I was in the room, taking it easy entailed a 12 pack of beer. After that was gone I thought it would be a good idea to walk over to a nearby bar and have some more. After probably twelve more drinks there, getting smacked by a woman, and falling on my drunken face in the parking lot, I found myself bashing in a hotel room door that I'd broken the key off in. I was asked to leave and refused. The cops were called. I've had a gun pulled on me twice in my life and that was one of them. They cuffed me and carted me off to jail. Criminal trespassing was the official charge. If there's a law against scaring the piss out of people, I guess I could have been charged with that, too.

After I'd spent about 12 hours in jail and had sobered up, for the most part, I was called before a judge to determine bail. Since I had no criminal record they let me go on my signature and a promise to come back for trial.

At the time my residence was in Ohio. Three months passed and it was time to go before a judge. I made it back to Dekalb County, but I did not have a lawyer because I could not afford one. I'm not sure what kind of court it was because there were a lot of people in there waiting to go before the judge. The prosecuting attorney talked to me and told me that if I'd plea guilty I'd get 18 months probation. I don't know what he was thinking. Evidently he hadn't looked too closely at the file and realized that I lived 500 miles away. I had looked up possible sentences for the crime and knew that I could get a year in prison for it as a first time offender, so anything other than jail time sounded good to me.

I went before the judge and she talked to me a bit to make sure I understood what was going on. After listening to me speak it became apparent to her that I wasn't from around those parts and she asked me where I was from. She gave the prosecutor an agitated look and spoke to him in a hushed tone.

She asked me, "Do you have $300?"

"I can get it if there's an ATM nearby."

Another agitated look at the prosecutor.

"Okay, there's an ATM across the street. If you plea guilty, we''ll fine you $300 and let you go. How do you plea?"

"Guilty." Probably said with a huge look of relief on my face.

I think that judge was impressed by the fact that I'd actually come back to go to court. She trusted me to leave the court room and get the money. I had to come back in and show her that I had the money. A guy (bailiff?) escorted me to a window where I paid the fine.

It meant that I'd forever be branded with a misdemeanor, but that judge could have easily sent me to jail. I would have lost my job and my truck. Lord knows what might have happened to me in jail.

It would be another 5 years before I'd start getting proper treatment, but I managed to avoid anymore conflicts with the law in that time I think in large part due to the leniency and compassion of that judge. Even in my deteriorated mental state I'd learned a lesson.

I was thinking about this the other day and felt like trying to find out if she was still in Dekalb County so I could send her a letter telling her this story, and how it turned out, and express my gratitude for how she'd handled the case all those years ago. I don't think things would have turned out so well if she would have sent me to jail.

[Wounded Bear]

1. K & R

Thanks for sharing that story, Tobin.

[Tobin S.]

2. You're welcome and thank you.

[Hoyt]

3. Glad things worked out for you. Decatur is a nice little town, close to Atlanta.

I think a letter would be nice. Judges don't always get thanks when they do something decent. Good luck.

[MiddleFingerMom]

4. You should try to contact her -- she would LOVE your story -- as do I.

[Tobin S.]

5. Thanks, hoss.

It is very good to see you this evening. I hope you are feeling better.

[dballance]

6. Glad you had a compassionate judge!

Also glad you got treatment later. Antidepressants have been very good for me.

Your case is a good example of why there shouldn't be mandatory sentencing laws.

[hunter]

7. At my very worst I had a friendly "mostly harmless" reputation with the local police.

While traveling I strove to maintain my cloak of invisibility. The only time I ever got into deep trouble was for sleeping in my car in Santa Monica. The two policemen, realizing they'd gone too far with someone who might clean up well for a court appearance to show off his bruises, they sent me on my way. After that I was never too timid to wake up friends or family if I needed a place to crash, or at least to sleep outside my car if I was in strange territory.

I'd learned much from my mom's bad example. She does not always respond appropriately to people in positions of "authority." I'd get in trouble at school and school administration would be very reluctant to call her. So I spent many peaceful hours sitting in the nurse's office if I'd been bleeding, or reading quietly in the school library.

I've got many people I "owe my life as it currently is" to.

I'd been "asked to" leave college twice. A paleontology professor I knew stood up for me, he'd invited me along for field work even though I wasn't enrolled in school at the time, and then the college dean who allowed me to return to school on this professor's recommendation. Furthermore, this professor alerted colleagues to keep an eye out for me and they did.

Unlike my similarly crazy grandfather who contributed much to the Second World War effort and then to the Apollo Moon project (many of the titanium parts of those machines were his), I'd never been sure if I "deserved" such consideration. But now I think EVERYBODY deserves such considerations for the simple fact we are all human beings.

[Tobin S.]

8. "But now I think EVERYBODY deserves such considerations for the simple fact we are all human beings"

Maybe we all should get a Mulligan depending on the severity of the crime. Bust in a hotel room door? Give us a few bucks and we'll give you a pass. Kill someone? That might take a little more deliberation.

[hunter]

14. I do agree violent people should be restrained from trouble.

One of my bad life experiences:

My girlfriend handcuffed her girlfriend's pimp/boyfriend to a urinal and was beating the crap out of him to find out where her girlfriend was.

I was standing outside the door explaining "rough sex." People accepted that. It was a rough neighborhood in San Francisco. Stuff like that, guys moaning, screaming "Fuck You Bitch, I'm gonna kill you!!!" not uncommon.

I jumped out of her moving car slid down the street later that night in Berkeley after she'd checked her girlfriend into rehab. That was the end of our very complex relationship. She sent all my stuff back to me in a box, no note. All I got from this relationship was an Orthodox Christian Baptism, "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" style.

We've crossed paths since then but avoided one another. Cross the street and look the other way. I don't want the money she owes me and it's a reconnection best not made in this universe or any other.

Previous to this her girlfriend meant to die in my bathtub. First naked woman I'd ever touched, my very worst Thanksgiving weekend ever. To top it off the Jehovah's Witness's stopped by shortly after. I was JW as a kid, no flag salute for me, until my mom was rejected by them for her political activism. After that we were Quakers because my mom could speak whatever she'd heard God saying and everyone would listen respectfully no matter how crazy it sounded and then move on...

[Kali]

9. I agree with MFM

see if you can find her and send her this!

[Tobin S.]

10. After posting the OP I looked for her on the web and I think I have found her.

I don't have a good address to send a letter to, but I do have the phone number of her secretary and I can probably get a good address from her.

[Kali]

11. I bet that would make her day, hell year!

let us know what happens

[Tuesday Afternoon]

12. she would appreciate hearing from you, Tobin. contact her.

especially at this time of year ... people tend to reflect and plan forward this time of year.

[Tobin S.]

13. 10-4. I think I will.

As I told Kali upthread, I looked on the web after I posted my OP and I think I have found her. Someone sent me a private message and said that I should also send a pic that I posted here of me being inducted into an honor society at school with my wife.

This thread just has "feel good" all over it.