I don't know if you understand.

[Tobin S.]

I've come from nothing. Everything I have I've worked for to get. The times I've been helped by others came at a price.

I'm doing the absolute best I can do right now as a trucker if I want to have any kind of a family life. I'm going to make 40k this year- small town; not much opportunity; heavy competition for jobs. I want to do better.

The only way I can do any better is by getting a four year college degree. There is nothing else I can do without that education.

I am 41 years old.

I don't know if you understand.

[we can do it]

1. I do, worked my ass off for all I have, payed my way thru school working as a waitress.

Now trying to get a job after recooping from a career ending (firefighter) injury to make a few dollars before I can get social security is unbelievably hard.

[Tobin S.]

4. Thank you

I don't think that enough people appreciate what it takes to come from nowhere and improve.

I'm struggling here because I can't just come right out and say what I want to say.

The American Dream has an important caveat. If you work hard...yes. If you are willing to work for it you will have a nice place to live and a secure life. I think that's still possible. And we have a social safety net as a sort of insurance. It's still there and we must preserve it.

I see a lot of people who simply have things handed to them and they have no appreciation for it. Here I am struggling to attain what they have gotten for free. Maybe I am suffering from envy and that might be a part of it. But it's more about respect. To come from nowhere and improve... to make progress mentally, emotionally, and financially. Not enough people know.

[RebelOne]

15. Hang in there, Tobin. You will make it.

I was married at 16 and didn't even finish high school. After being married for 9 years with two children and divorced, I decided to make something of my life.

I went to work in the corporate world. I worked in offices of land corporations, learned computer programming and was made supervisor over 10 people at one of them. Then I quit because I wasn't receiving the money I deserved for my position. I then worked as a typesetter for a printing company and went from there as typesetter at a city magazine in Miami.

Then I moved to Georgia and worked as a typesetter for a company that published outdoors magazines for 48 states. Then the typesetting department was dissolved because everything went digital, and I was promoted to the position of copy editor. I was there for 13 years until the company was losing revenue on ad sales, and I and many others were laid off. I was already past retirement age, so I just decided to retire. The company was very generous with severance pay, and I received $10,000.

I may be blonde, and despite quitting high school in the 11th grade, I was never dumb.

Also, my daughter had worked at a Catholic college in Miami and was able to obtain a free education. She earned her bachelors degree. And within the past couple of years had earned her master's degree. She is now an English teacher at a charter middle school in Miami.

So, you can do it if you have ambition.

[Jetboy]

2. I think I understand.

I am about the same age and work at an auction house moving entire estates. It's hard work but I am also at the auction from start to finish and am able to invest in real bargains. Then I sell the bargains person to person or at consignment stores or on ebay.

It is slow sledding but the movement is always FORWARD! Best of luck to you Tobin S. Hope you find a way to get ahead as I know it isn't easy.

[Tobin S.]

5. Thanks Jetboy

I appreciate your understanding. It sounds like you have a good life even if progress isn't happening as quickly as you'd like. Yes, progress! That's what it's all about.

[hunter]

3. Follow your calling, I believe it's true.

Last night I awoke to the sound of a terrible sordid argument between two adult men. (We live adjacent to a public park, which is why our wall always has graffiti on it.) Stepbrothers, 30+ years age. Somebody caught in bed with some inappropriate relative this Thanksgiving Holiday. Mom or Sister & Stepbrother? It was that awful. Soap Opera stuff. I was about ready to call 911 expecting gunshots when I heard a third adult male trying to break up the fight. He wasn't much successful, but then I heard the police cars racing up, saw the flashing lights, and things quieted down, no gunshots.

For this Thanksgiving I'm thankful I don't live in that world.

[Tobin S.]

6. Hi Hunter

You can come from nowhere and stay there. A lot of people do. To have enough wits about you to recognize a way out and pursue it? That's what I'm talking about. It doesn't sound like your neighbors are there yet.

I'm glad you have attained a level of comfort.

[dawg]

7. I'm proud of the progress you have made.

I've followed your posts a long-time, and I remember some of the difficulties you faced earlier in your life. I think you are doing an awesome job of making your dreams come true. It's a hard climb.

In many ways, I'm a lucky little dawg. I have had lots of things handed to me, and I try never to forget that. I have nothing but the greatest of admiration for someone who can make it in this economy all on their own.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

8. I think I understand, my dear Tobin...

I've had a lot of things handed to me, and others I have struggled for. But even my worst struggles are miniscule compared to what you've been through.

You have made incredible progress and you will succeed!

I'm so proud of you.

[rug]

9. Some things can only be understood by experiencing them.

""How can you expect a man who's warm to understand a man who's cold? The cold stung. A murky fog wrapped itself around Shukhov and made him cough painfully. The temperature out there was -17; Shukov's temperature was 99. The fight was on." - One Day in the Life of Ivan Denisovich

You're doing great, Tobin.

[nolabear]

10. I very much understand. I came from very little and went back to school

as in finished undergraduate and then on to graduate school in my 30s-40s. It was hard in some ways and easier in others. Once you've held a job college isn't nearly as impressive.

I'm lucky in that Mr. Bear has always made a decent income. But he's not me, and I needed to have my own.

Hang in there. It's work but I've never regretted it.

[grasswire]

11. one foot forward

name the problem
plot a path

We believe in you.
What would you like to study?

[Callalily]

12. I absolutely know where

you are coming from. Although you struggle, and continually cross hurtles, many of us have come before you and therefore are cheering you on!

[nolabear]

13. Have I ever told you how much I love your screen name?

I'd name a character that but Rebecca Wells beat me to it in a fairly good book, The Crowning Glory of Calla Lily Ponder.

[Phentex]

14. You may be surprised...

by how many people here really DO understand your situation. I know it can be exhausting but you will get through it and come out on the sunnier side.

[PassingFair]

16. It's all relative, Tobin.

You already have a lot.
Your wife is able bodied as well.
You have a "safety net", even if it has holes in it.

Many wealthy people live desperate lives.
In many ways you are already successful.
Perhaps a new definition of success is needed.

[femmocrat]

17. Of course we understand.

Not many democrats come from the upper crust.

Hang in there Tobin. If it wasn't difficult, it wouldn't be worth it all. We are all pulling for you!