One of my daughters attempted suicide a few days ago. The other got married.

[LiberalEsto]

I am in a strange, strange place right now. I don't even know what to think, and I feel numb.

I am thankful that my younger daughter, age 28, told me she had swallowed the pills Friday evening, and that I took her seriously, called 911 and got her transported to the hospital in time for her stomach to be pumped. In spite of this, the prescription pills affected her heart and liver and she was in a precarious condition on Saturday, the day of her sister's wedding. She was to have been the maid of honor, but she has had psychological and substance issues for years, adamantly refusing any form of treatment except anti-depressants.

And I am thankful that even though my husband and older daughter and I were in shock over what had happened, we managed to pull off the wedding - with more than 85 guests - with relatively few hitches. It was a do-it-yourself wedding, with a number of people including myself cooking the food. I made almost all the decorations over the past few months, etc. I have almost no memory of making tray after tray of entrees for more than 8 hours nonstop on Friday, because I was worried sick about our younger daughter, as well as the emotional toll this was taking on the older one.

Now the younger one is not allowed to be released, despite her demands, and is being involuntarily committed for an unknown period of time to a facility specializing in mental health issues. This is because her treating psychiatrist at the hospital told me hers was considered a "serious poisoning."

And I am thankful that she is safe for now, and is going to be getting some kind of treatment at last, though I have no idea how it will affect her, or whether it could finally get her onto a path of accepting counseling and some kind of substance abuse support group. She is now physically out of danger, and will be transferred as soon as a bed becomes available.

And I am thankful that our older daughter is now married to a wonderful, wonderful man with whom she has been friends for more than 10 years. They met working for a progressive political fundraising group in 2004 and wound up working for the Kerry campaign in its final weeks. Their friendship turned romantic a couple of years ago, delighting their family, their many friends and relatives. Her younger sister was happy for her too. Yesterday my older daughter, her new husband, my husband and I worked for hours cleaning up the wedding location, though my husband left a bit early to see our younger daughter in the hospital.

Later today my "lucky" husband has to get a painful tooth pulled, but he had to go to work first because none of his co-workers would cover the 7 am IT tasks for him. I guess when it rains, it pours.

And I am home, physically worn out, taking with the case manager about which treatment facility would be best, hoping the bride and groom are finally getting some much deserved rest and time together during a three-day honeymoon drive to a nearby state. At least the wedding is over; it was beautiful and folks loved the Estonian sauerkraut that my brother made, the Slovenian halushka by the groom's father, the meatloaves and curried chickpeas made by my daughter's new mother-in-law, the amazing array of American and ethnic and vegan dishes, and the wonderful cake buffet from a famed Pittsburgh bakery. I was so stressed during the reception that I barely ate, and just drank a little water. And so it goes.

Thanksgiving? I can't even bring myself to think about it. Our younger daughter had offered to do most of the cooking and I think she is hoping to get released, even though I seriously doubt that she will be. I suppose I'll manage to cook some kind of vegetarian "turkey" for my husband and myself, and make a small turkey breast, bring a plate to her in the hospital if permitted,or freeze it for when she comes home.

I was supposed to have jury duty this morning, but a compassionate person in the court clerk's office rescheduled it, when I called and asked, so I could have a day to recover. Little did I know...

[In_The_Wind]

1. ...

[ZombieHorde]

2. Life is so messy.

I wish you and your family love and healing this winter.

[magical thyme]

3. ...

[pinboy3niner]

4. ...

[Xyzse]

5. I'm cooking Thanksgiving this year.

I live in MD, but will be doing that in VA at my sister's place.

I was told I am welcome to invite people.
I'd invite you, though you'd have to deal with people that are voracious meat eaters.

My brother in law's cousin is coming in from Russia, and he has this idea of getting them back for the food that they foisted upon them during their trip there.

So you will have to expect eating something exotic, other than the Turkey and fixins of course.

The Turkey is going to be cooked by me. I have a salt and spice rub prepared, which I will proceed to molest the turkey with tonight, making sure to pay attention to every single inch and crevice. It will be oiled to insane heights with butter too...

So uh, yeah. You're welcome to join in if you wish. Currently, my count for the thing is 13 people, it is easily scaled to 15-16 if you wish.

[irisblue]

6. ...

hoping for healing for your family.

[oldandhappy]

7. Hugs and prayers

You have a reason to feel numb. WOW Life handed you a lot. Grateful you were able to do the wedding and to have loving friends around you for the wedding. Grateful your younger daughter is alive. Hope this is an event that will help her turn around and accept more help.

[olddots]

8. you are not alone

[CaliforniaPeggy]

9. My dear LiberalEsto...

What a roller coaster!

Please take care of yourself...

[antiquie]

10. {{{{strength}}}}

❤

[progressoid]

11. ...

[LiberalEsto]

12. Addendum...

The new bride called a little while ago. They are having car trouble.
Of course.

I told her to take notes, and maybe write a novel about it some day.

[elleng]

15. OH DAMN!

I'm in southern MD. Lemme know if I can help.

[Xyzse]

19. Offering the same thing.

I'm in MD, so...
Also, I was serious about inviting you for Thanksgiving.

Just in case you know?

[LiberalEsto]

20. They're not in Maryland or Virginia, but thank you for your generous offer to help

And also for your Thanksgiving invitation. I wish I could take you up on it, but if my younger one is still hospitalized, I'll be cooking for my husband and the newlyweds, and my older daughter will help. If the younger one is somehow released - which I hope she isn't because she needs treatment - I'll be cooking for my husband, her and myself. The newlyweds refuse to come here if she's out of the hospital.

[Xyzse]

22. I see...

Alright, well, it is an option.
Granted, like I mentioned, most of us are meat eaters.

I am also woefully inadequate when it comes to my repertoire of vegetable dishes.
So, I have to bone up on that too.

[elleng]

13. Oh LibEst, been thinking and thinking about you and yours these days,

with no idea. I am pleased she's being cared for, and hopefully obtaining the attention she needs.

[LiberalEsto]

21. Thank you Ellen. I hope the same for her

but it could be a long long road for all of us.

[Kali]

14. oh man

take a breath and a day for yourself asap. you have been through the wringer, both for good and sad reasons. rest.

[LiberalEsto]

23. Thank you, Kali, I hope I can

but today is not that day.
I'm washing a mountain of tablecloths from the wedding, and my husband is having a tooth pulled right around now.

[orleans]

16. take good care of yourself (suggestion: candles & hot bubble bath)

you got through this with flying colors (whatever that means) so give yourself a break. i'm very sorry for what your younger daughter must be going through--and you as well.

and i want to also say congratulations on the wedding--it sounds like it was a terrific event.

[panader0]

17. Wow.

Best wishes for both daughters. Like Kali said, take a day for yourself, or a week....

[blackcrowflies]

18. I am sorry

I hope the fact that she asked for help means she realized she does not want to do this.

This is when I wish it were still possible to commit people, although it sounds like something like that has happened?

I have a family member with substance issues for a long time, who turned his life around ten years ago. Sometimes hitting bottom works.

Your family did a great job with the wedding. Strong people all of you. I hope some of that wonderful food is left over for you.

[Crewleader]

24. You never know the twist and turns life can throw at you

and always unexpected. You take care of yourself and you're in my prayers dear friend.

[GreenPartyVoter]

25. *hugs*

[applegrove]

26. Vibes to your family.

[NJCher]

27. just an idea, but

You've been through so much, including a cooking marathon for the wedding (which sounds lovely, btw). How about saying this is that one in a zillion times that you'll order your TG dinner out. Or go out for Thanksgiving?

I like orleans' suggestions, too.

I think you're pushing yourself too hard. Now is the time to realize that you've been through some very stressful experiences. It's time to think about you.

Experiences like this are highly unusual, so you can justify the additional expense.



Cher