Well, I guess Bill Cosby is still good for something.
I just got some Chinese food, and got a packet of mustard sauce for my spring rolls; so I thought I would try it. Then I remembered an old Bill Cosby routine wherein he tells the story of taking a girl to a Chinese restaurant. He wanted to get his money's worth, so he slathered mustard sauce on his food. He tried to remain cool, but the girl knew something was wrong, because, he said, "my eyes started to bleed." So I moved my can of Pepsi right by my hand, and very cautiously dipped one of my spring rolls into it. Cosby was right -- my precautions were necessary. That stuff will clear your sinuses! 
= new reply since forum marked as read
He spread it really thick on a bite of sushi. His entire face, neck, and ears turned flame red. 
I don't think he's had wasabi since....
My BIL said that if you add a pinch of sugar to the mustard, you can kick the heat up a notch.
Jeremy Clarkson
Like any responsible parent, I would not leave a loaded gun in the children’s playroom or keep my painkillers in their sweetie tin. But it turns out that for two years there has been a nuclear bomb in one of my kitchen cupboards, between the tomato ketchup and the Rice Krispies.
It’s an American chilli sauce that was bought by my wife as a joky Christmas present. And, like all joky Christmas presents, it was put in a drawer and forgotten about. It’s called limited-edition Insanity private reserve and it came in a little wooden box, along with various warning notices. “Use this product one drop at a time,” it said. “Keep away from eyes, pets and children. Not for people with heart or respiratory problems. Use extreme caution.”
Unfortunately, we live in a world where everything comes with a warning notice. Railings. Vacuum cleaners. Energy drinks. My quad bike has so many stickers warning me of decapitation, death and impalement that they become a nonsensical blur.
The result is simple. We know these labels are drawn up to protect the manufacturer legally, should you decide one day to insert a vacuum-cleaner pipe up your bottom, or to try to remove your eye with a teaspoon. So we ignore them. They are meaningless. One drop at a time! Use extreme caution! On a sauce. Pah. Plainly it was just American lawyer twaddle.
(more at linked headline)
