Police: Woman threw cooked salmon at mother-in-law, tossed into jail for assault

[TexasTowelie]

Per request I'm reposting this thread here.

A 24-year-old College Station woman remained behind bars Friday after she was accused of assaulting her mother-in-law with a piece of cooked salmon.

The woman reportedly hit her mother-in-law in the head with the salmon during an argument about feeding her toddler with a fork, according to an arrest report from the Wednesday night incident in the 400 block of Southwest Parkway.

The mother-in-law told police the woman then flailed her arms wildly in a circular motion, punching her in the arm and leaving large scratch marks, the report stated.

When questioned, the woman told police she threw the salmon but that her mother-in-law reciprocated by throwing the fish back at her, police said. She denied hitting the woman, telling police the two had an arm wrestling match.

Read more: http://www.theeagle.com/news/local/police-woman-threw-cooked-salmon-at-mother-in-law/article_91a03e4f-950b-51b2-9a66-ead9022c7a76.html

[BlueJazz]

1. Who called the Off-fish-ers.?

[Joe Shlabotnik]

2. Good

The smell of cooking Salmon triggers a migraine with me.

[pinboy3niner]

25. Funny, salmon have a similar aversion

[chknltl]

3. She probably smelt funny afterwords....

.... that said, this whole story smells fishy.

[Kali]

4. the scales of Justice will decide the matter

[Orrex]

13. With a gill-t verdict for this cold-blooded act, she might wind up on death roe.

[pinboy3niner]

15. So finny I forgot to gaff

[Orrex]

16. Wow--you totally schooled me!

[pinboy3niner]

20. I smelt that one coming

[rug]

5. Quite a roe.

[DFW]

6. She should never have cooked it

In Texas, tossing raw or smoked salmon at someone is only a misdemeanor.

[pinboy3niner]

7. Obviously it was a Sockeye salmon

[magical thyme]

8. Gillty as charged! nt

[Orrex]

14. Dammit.

Beat me to that one, you big jerky jerk.

[Major Nikon]

9. You'd think the cops would have bigger fish to fry

[Sancho]

10. The mother in law threw back a wild caught salmon...

[fadedrose]

11. If I had a dollar for every woman who wanted to throw

a salmon at her Mother-in-law, I'd be, maybe not rich, but certainly not poorer.

Some mother-in-laws should live in another state. I hope the husband knew who to support, but if he's like his mother, he doesn't.

[caraher]

12. I was on a jury for assault and battery with a pizza

First thing we did when we started deliberating was to laugh!

The sad part is that there were other elements to the encounter - in the end I don't think we would have found the defendant guilty simply for tossing a (cold) pizza at the store manager. It didn't help the guy's case that he gave a completely implausible story about his emotional state when he showed up shortly after the store opened, in his bathrobe, on a Sunday morning. If he'd just admitted he was mad at the manager but said he didn't assault him, we'd have been vastly more inclined to believe him. Instead, he claimed he was unflaggingly polite both on the phone and in person.

[LiberalEsto]

17. She will soon be singing a different tuna

if she nets some jail time.

[pinboy3niner]

18. They should lox her up and throw away the keta!

[Yavin4]

19. That woman is going to be really on the hook for this.

She'll be swimming upstream soon.

[pinboy3niner]

21. Not an unusual occurrence when someone holds a fish fly

"Fish fight!"

[olddots]

22. that was

Salmon Enchanted Evening .sorry

[El Supremo]

23. Lox of laughs!

[pinboy3niner]

24. "You breaded my fried salmon with CORN FLAKES???"

[rurallib]

26. this may upset the spawning cycle

[NobodyHere]

27. Oh Cod

[pinboy3niner]

28. Oh Holy Finity