Hummus: Hu Are You? Hu Hu, Hu Hu?

[KamaAina]

http://tabletmag.com/scroll/190997/hummus-hu-are-you-hu-hu-hu-hu

I’m told it’s International Hummus Day. This gets me started on a rant. Admittedly, it does not take much.

People, why would you mess with hummus? When done right, it is the perfect food: light, airy, tangy, packed with flavor. And yet, moustache-twirling food-Instagramming Williamsburgians and orthorexic paleo anti-science fitness-obsessed nimrods alike want to mess with perfection. They arrogantly create lumpen Frankensteinian versions of God’s creation. They should be punished.

On the hipster side of things, Serious Eats advocates slab bacon hummus made with lardons, hot pickled cherry peppers, and bacon fat. Do I actually need to say that this is an abomination unto the Lord? Or as my Dad would have said, “a hillul hashem?” Look, my Dad loved bacon, but putting it in hummus is immoral. As a flavor, bacon takes over everything it touches—putting it in hummus is like dropping an elephant on a monarch butterfly. Plus, it is so ubiquitous in artisanal circles, it is a punchline.

Serious Eats also suggests we try Muffalummus, or “what hummus would be if it were invented in New Orleans.” WHICH IT WAS NOT. Olives, capers, pimentos, red wine vinegar and cubed salami do not belong in hummus. Go trim your sideburns and eat an actual muffaletta.

[kentauros]

1. Hipsters ruin everything.

It's no wonder they're so unhappy.

[Arugula Latte]

2. This is my favorite way to eat hummus:

Get a piece of garlic naan (hey, I'm global, what can I say?). Spread it with hummus. Sprinkle on sliced cherry tomatoes, sliced cukes, red onion, and feta cheese. Not sure if that's hipster but it sure is deeelish.

[KamaAina]

3. Lose the feta and you've got me.

Adding cheese to hummus sounds like one of the author's no-nos.

[Arugula Latte]

5. It's so salty and goooood though.

[KamaAina]

6. Perhaps you can enlighten me.

Why do so many "SF-style pizzas" include feta? I mean, c'mon, pizza?

[Arugula Latte]

7. Well, it is a Mediterranean ingredient, but, yeah, pizza has sure strayed far from its simple roots.

I mean -- pineapple?

I do like the classic true Italian thin crust, simple tomato sauce or fresh tomatoes, fresh mozzerella, olive oil, and basil combo the best.

[KamaAina]

8. The "Hawaiian" pizza was invented in -- Oakland.

It is far more popular in California than it is in Hawai'i. Pizza Hut pretty much rules the islands. And basic pepperoni, combo, etc. are the order of the day.

[Arugula Latte]

9. Yes, I think California led the charge in "creative" pizza.

Wolfgang Puck is the gang leader. He even has the word "gang" in his name.

[Avalux]

4. My favorite hummus is homemade and simple.

Tahini, chick peas, olive oil, lemon juice, garlic, salt, and smoked paprika.

Why do hipsters feel a need to make it complicated and well, NOT hummus!

On edit, I realize the article says that smoked paprika does not belong in hummus. Oh well, I like it sprinkled on top, but I am not a hipster, I am an indie kid from way back.

http://www.differencebetween.net/miscellaneous/culture-miscellaneous/difference-between-hipster-and-indie/

[kentauros]

10. My favorite Mediterranean cafe serves their hummus with paprika

sprinkled on top. And their parents (who started the restaurant) were Palestinian immigrants. Can't get much more authentic than that!