How I saved my ass (a community project)
OK, so first of all I need to correct one thing in my earlier post.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1018867391
We took the halter off of him when he seemed to settle down
As soon as I realized he was out I got his halter and my cellphone and started looking out front. I put out a message on the local breaking news facebook group. Almost immediately there was a reply. Spotty Bottom ...
Oh, did I mention that his name is Lyndon Spotty Bottom? Well it is. Lyndon because he is obviously a good Texas Democrat. Spotty because, well, his is obviously spotty. And Bottom -- Aristus, you will appreciate this -- refers to the character from A Midsummer Night's Dream by William Shakespeare or whoever the hell they say wrote it)
So I called Melodie and started walking down the highway.
Some locals had corralled him in the cemetery.
I walked in there with the halter not knowing what I was going to do, but I thought I could keep an eye on him. Not too long thereafter the cowboys came. Well, actually only one. The sheriff had sent him to catch the donkey and take him to the animal shelter or something. (I really dont't want to think about the "or something"
I told him that this was my ass.
Did I mention that he was on his horse? Well he was. He told me that he could rope him and take him to our place for $200.
Not having $200. I said quite enthusiatically, "I haven't got $200!!!"
By then my wife had gotten there and I told her. She explained to him rationally that our place was just around the corner but that we didn't have $200.
So he said he would catch him for us for $100. There really wasn't much we could do.
So Clint Eastwood chased the donkey all over one end of the cemetery and roped him, He helped us get the halter on him. Then he said "Y'all have got your hands full, so I'm not going to charge you anything" -- then he left.
So there we were, standing in the cemetery collectively holding onto our ass -- with both hands. (petronious, that's for you)
We thought that if we were lucky we might be able to lead him to where we could hold him until we got hold of a trailer.
I remember when I was young and naive ... I am no longer young.
Donkeys are traditionally known to be stubborn ... because they are. Well Spotty
bottom had developed this trait into a high art. This was obviously a job for my wife.
She took his halter and tugged and cajoled and we finally got four or five feet - some in the wrong direction. Melodie then got him going in the right direction by backing him up. This worked for a while until it didn't.
The donkey would not be moved any farther. So I left Melodie holding the donkey while I ran home and got some hay and more carrots and an apple or two.
I returned to find that Melodie had been able to move him a little farther ... before he broke loose leaving her wit a hand full of rope burns and blood.
We tried to gently coax him into a corner where we thought we might .... hell we had no idea really.
3 hours later we had been around an through the cemetery at least 15 times. Which reminds me that we need to go over there and put some.
We were joined by a rather stout friend from the community who helped is go around the cemetery several more times. We were even able to get his halter again ... and he was able to plough the cemetery with us.
We thanked John, apologized for nearly getting him trampled or drug into a headstone. Fortunately he was not roughed up too badly, but he had too leave.
After another hour or two, Melodie put out on several facebook groups that if someon could come help us catch the donkey the could have him. One person asked if we would deliver it to her -- she obviously had not read the whole post. WE NEEDED HELP AND A TRAILER!!!!
We did get another one of our Progressive group to come help...and get initiated into the group of those that have been dragged by an ass. We moved him around the cemetery several more times in the previous manner.
After a while someone messaged that they didn't want the donkey. but they would come help. When she finally got there we learned that she and her son had driven from the other side of the county! -- to help some crazy people they had never met!
Did I mention we are crazy? Well we are.
ah, the country lifeTosh and her son michael have some rescue donkeys and were not unfamiliar with this situation - if in a slightly less insane format.
It wasn't too long before Antonio showed up. He lives nearby and works at the local equine vet. group.
we got Spotty calmed down and in the far corner. Then Antonio went and got his trailer which we backed up just inside the gate. To make a long story short - we finally got him out of the trailer and into our back yard/pasture -- with a muc sturdier gate than before.
Thanks to all these wonderful folks we have Spotty back.
http://vid1096.photobucket.com/albums/g339/Trnrdem/Mobile%20Uploads/20160520_170611_zpsrkzwfmuw.mp4
The last thing Tosh told me before she left was "Get him clipped." In the near future our Democratic
Donkey will be changing his identification to NGP. (No gender preferred).
Ah, the country life. Next installment will be on how our dog Rocky bravely chased a skunk ... and removing (or somewhat ameliorating the resulting aroma with horse shampoo, vinegar, ang lots of lavender oil.
Ow to take the dogs for a walk ... on tight leashes
= new reply since forum marked as read
Great story! 
you met some interesting folks. 
Eagerly awaiting the next installment...
it really works. trust me. 
http://home.earthlink.net/~skunkremedy/home/sk00001.htm
Great story - and I can guarantee it won't be the last! 
I'll post some helpful hints for the burro in a day or two. Have to run now. 
