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Sat Mar 11, 2017, 10:54 PM

What's your favorite malaphor?

Everyone knows what a metaphor is, but I prefer malaphors.
A malaphor is a mixture of two common idioms, or cliches leading to the creation of a something new in metaphor form.
Probably the best known is it's not Rocket Surgery. A combination of it's not rocket science and it's not brain surgery.

My personal favorites" We'll burn that bridge when we get to it" and " The road to hell is the spice of life".
What's your favorite malaphor?

bench

55 replies, 8748 views

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Arrow 55 replies Author Time Post
Reply What's your favorite malaphor? (Original post)
bench scientist Mar 2017 OP
pkdu Mar 2017 #1
democratisphere Mar 2017 #2
longship Mar 2017 #3
Xipe Totec Mar 2017 #4
3catwoman3 Mar 2017 #11
Xipe Totec Mar 2017 #17
Kimchijeon Mar 2017 #24
Nac Mac Feegle Mar 2017 #5
lpbk2713 Mar 2017 #6
Doreen Mar 2017 #7
brush Mar 2017 #8
Doreen Mar 2017 #10
Ron Obvious Mar 2017 #9
eppur_se_muova Mar 2017 #20
Ron Obvious Mar 2017 #21
mahatmakanejeeves Mar 2017 #39
MrPurple Mar 2017 #12
discntnt_irny_srcsm Mar 2017 #16
eppur_se_muova Mar 2017 #19
unblock Mar 2017 #13
earthshine Mar 2017 #14
uriel1972 Mar 2017 #31
uriel1972 Mar 2017 #33
Ron Obvious Mar 2017 #41
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #47
discntnt_irny_srcsm Mar 2017 #15
COLGATE4 Mar 2017 #18
fNord Mar 2017 #22
Iggo Mar 2017 #28
fNord Mar 2017 #35
TexasBushwhacker Mar 2017 #23
bench scientist Mar 2017 #25
TlalocW Mar 2017 #26
truebluegreen Mar 2017 #27
Iggo Mar 2017 #29
NJCher Mar 2017 #30
uriel1972 Mar 2017 #32
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #45
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #34
WinkyDink Mar 2017 #43
Phentex Mar 2017 #36
Zorro Mar 2017 #37
OriginalGeek Mar 2017 #38
Dave Starsky Mar 2017 #40
WinkyDink Mar 2017 #42
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #44
WinkyDink Mar 2017 #49
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #52
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #46
sprinkleeninow Mar 2017 #48
WinkyDink Mar 2017 #50
world wide wally Mar 2017 #51
ashling Mar 2017 #53
bench scientist Mar 2017 #54
Tommy_Carcetti Mar 2017 #55

Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 10:56 PM

1. I have no horse in this fight! nt

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 10:57 PM

2. To be or not to be; Now what was the question?

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 10:58 PM

3. Move the goal posts all the way out to left field. nt

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:03 PM

4. If we hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes should fall like a house of cards. Checkmate. nt

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Response to Xipe Totec (Reply #4)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 12:15 AM

11. I think that is...

...a mala-four. Well done!!!!

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Response to 3catwoman3 (Reply #11)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 07:55 AM

17. Credit to Zapp Brannigan - Futurama. nt

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Response to Xipe Totec (Reply #4)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 08:32 PM

24. You beat me to it lol



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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:04 PM

5. Make sure every T is dotted and every I crossed. nt

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:15 PM

6. Yogi Berra.




What else need be said?

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:23 PM

7. Power corrupts,

absolute power corrupts absolutely.

This is exactly what is happening.

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Response to Doreen (Reply #7)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:37 PM

8. Also, absolute power reveals.

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Response to brush (Reply #8)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 12:01 AM

10. I like that.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sat Mar 11, 2017, 11:45 PM

9. I heard someone mention "gelding the lilly" the other day.

Does the pope shit in the woods?
We were just two sheep that passed in the night.

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Response to Ron Obvious (Reply #9)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 10:46 AM

20. "To gild refined gold, to paint the lily ..."

Gilding the lily is already a malaphor.

Therefore, to be possess'd with double pomp,
To guard a title that was rich before,
To gild refined gold, to paint the lily,
To throw a perfume on the violet,
To smooth the ice, or add another hue
Unto the rainbow, or with taper-light
To seek the beauteous eye of heaven to garnish,
Is wasteful and ridiculous excess.

Salisbury, in The Life and Death of King John, Act 4, Scene 2, by you-know-who

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Response to eppur_se_muova (Reply #20)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 10:57 AM

21. Thanks, I actually didn't remember that.

It's always important to have your facts in order when engaging in sneering pedantry, so I'll be sure to remember this.

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Response to Ron Obvious (Reply #21)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 10:12 AM

39. Hahahaha. Thanks.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 12:19 AM

12. Does the pope shit in the woods?

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Response to MrPurple (Reply #12)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 04:52 AM

16. Is a bear catholic?

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Response to discntnt_irny_srcsm (Reply #16)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 10:38 AM

19. Bears are omnivores -- you can't get more catholic than that.

(Well, you didn't say Catholic ...)

cath·o·lic
ˈkaTH(?lik/
adjective: catholic

including a wide variety of things; all-embracing.
"her tastes are pretty catholic"
synonyms: universal, diverse, diversified, wide, broad, broad-based, eclectic, liberal, latitudinarian; More
comprehensive, all-encompassing, all-embracing, all-inclusive
"her musical tastes are quite catholic"
antonyms: narrow

Origin
late Middle English: from Catholic.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 12:36 AM

13. This thread really rubs me up the wrong tree!

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 03:53 AM

14. I hate to say anything good about GWB, but ...

 

"Fool me once ... shame on ... shame on you,
fool me twice, er, ummm, ... won't get fooled again!"

was one of the funniest things I have ever heard.

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Response to earthshine (Reply #14)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 12:59 AM

31. The importance of bondage...

between mother and child. Another Dubya doozy.

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Response to uriel1972 (Reply #31)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 01:04 AM

33. We really did misunderestimate him...

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Response to uriel1972 (Reply #31)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 11:00 AM

41. I thought that was Dan Quayle?

Ha, isn't it amazing that, considering present circumstances, Dan Quayle seems like a perfectly reasonable candidate for the office now?

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Response to Ron Obvious (Reply #41)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 12:46 AM

47. Quayle spelt 'potato' 'POTATOE'

😆

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 04:52 AM

15. People in glass houses sink sh-sh-ships.

A penny saved is worth two in the bush, isn't it?
And don't cross the road if you can't get out of the kitchen.
Why don't you make like a tree, and get the f*@k outta here?

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 08:20 AM

18. All's well that ends.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 03:45 PM

22. "Well if that ain't the pot.....

Calling the pipe green."

Also: "this'll be like getting two birds stoned at once."

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Response to fNord (Reply #22)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 11:39 PM

28. That reminds me, I gotta catch up on my Trailer Park Boys.

I miss me some Ricky.

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Response to Iggo (Reply #28)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 06:16 AM

35. Ricky, remember what I said about thinking before you talk.....

One of those words wasn't real.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 08:08 PM

23. Don't stick your neck out on a limb n/t

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 09:20 PM

25. LOL all of these are great!

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 10:03 PM

26. You can lead a horse to water

But you can't make it make a silk purse out of a pig in a poke and stay happy as a clam.

TlalocW

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 10:59 PM

27. We'll jump off that bridge when we get to it.

 

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Sun Mar 12, 2017, 11:41 PM

29. My brother is fond of messing up the common age and height ones.

That guy's fifty if he's an inch.

-- or --

That kid's six feet if he's a day.

(Cracks himself up, he does.)

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 12:36 AM

30. These are hilarious and I am going to start

collecting them when I hear them.

Being an English teacher, I rarely mess up a cliche, mostly because we're trained not to use them. I do, however, switch up names of stores. When I talk to my brother, who is an engineer and thus very precise, he corrects me. For example, he patiently explains that it illogical for me to to say Shop 'n Stop. "They would not want you to stop shopping, you understand," he says. "That is why it's Stop 'n Shop."


Cher

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Response to NJCher (Reply #30)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 01:00 AM

32. I could care less...

It's very unique after all.

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Response to NJCher (Reply #30)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 12:29 AM

45. When my hub's parents used to visit,

his mom called Food Lion, 'Food Tiger'. Now we still call it that to this day!
Ya gotta interject silliness ta keep it reallll...



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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 02:19 AM

34. "I know how hard it is to put food on your family." Mad Cow(boy)

(Maybe this is a malaprop and not what the OP asked for?)
Well, anyway 😝

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Response to sprinkleeninow (Reply #34)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 06:08 PM

43. ?? Dubya said this. Is that whom you mena?

 

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 08:51 AM

36. Not the brightest bulb in the shed. Just heard this on tv...

that's mostly where I hear these. People try to sound witty, but then mix up the phrases.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 09:28 AM

37. Let's get this boat on the road

I use it all the time.

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 10:04 AM

38. Well now, I reckon this subject

is a horse of a different flavor!

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 10:25 AM

40. You buttered your bread, now lie in it. n/t

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Mon Mar 13, 2017, 06:07 PM

42. A man's reach should exceed his grasp, or what's a metaphor?

 

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Response to WinkyDink (Reply #42)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 12:16 AM

44. Aw, man. Now I'M all mixed up. Moreso than usual.

Is moreso a proper word? The grammaticals will reprimand me. And yas, that was the other 'selected' pResident in the Peoples' Whitehouse, the champion of brush clearing, bush*
🆖
Anyway, 🍻
(A tad foggy tonite. Just took note of your user name. I had a Winky Dink set, did you? Hahah.)

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Response to sprinkleeninow (Reply #44)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 09:30 PM

49. Oh, I had a WinkyDink set, for sure!

 

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Response to WinkyDink (Reply #49)

Wed Mar 15, 2017, 11:52 PM

52. Now then, should I ask you to describe it (The Winky Dink) and its application

or should I drop this like a hot potatoe❓

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 12:34 AM

46. Most excellent thread! Love it. It's been good for my head, doncha know! n/t

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 12:57 AM

48. One more post and I'm done.

Don't cry over spilled chickens.
Don't count your milk before it's hatched.

Ima

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Response to sprinkleeninow (Reply #48)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 09:31 PM

50. I ALWAYS cry over spilled chickens! It's a doggy-dog world!

 

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Tue Mar 14, 2017, 10:34 PM

51. He didn't know whether to wind his watch or walk to school

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Thu Mar 16, 2017, 05:20 AM

53. What you have there is

called a mixed metaphor. As a college instructor i would advise against mixing your metaphors

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Response to ashling (Reply #53)

Thu Mar 16, 2017, 02:02 PM

54. dually noted (pun intended).

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Response to bench scientist (Original post)

Thu Mar 16, 2017, 02:11 PM

55. Does the Catholic bear pope shit in the woods? nt

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