Any straight guys around tonight?

[XemaSab]

A friend of a friend says that wanting to have sex with other men is a natural human urge that all men struggle with. This dude is a hardcore fundamentalist Christian.

Thoughts?

[PoliticAverse]

1. I think the Onion covered this...

http://www.theonion.com/articles/why-do-all-these-homosexuals-keep-sucking-my-cock,10861/

[MrScorpio]

2. Your friend is struggling with it himself… He's projecting

Fundies tend to do that at lot.

For me, sure I'm straight, but when any urge that may come up… I'm looking at you, David Beckham, and your damned fast food commercials… And say to myself, "Meh."

'Cause, it's never going to happen.

[denbot]

3. Not for me..

I do think you friend is struggling with his own issues.

[intaglio]

4. I think your f.o.a.f. is swimming in Egypt or the Sudan

Or somewhere else in denial.

I am straight but because I was spectacularly unsuccessful with women there was a short time (in my 20's) when I wondered if I might be homosexual. Even during that period of questioning I never felt desire or any urge to touch, kiss or otherwise indulge any physical expression of that idea. The openly homosexual friends I had never thought of me as a sexual partner but ...

One day I went out for a drink with an acquaintance who, I found out that day, was a male homosexual. He introduced me to another man who, it proved, was predatory and they took me back to their place and attempted to seduce me. I thought "Why not?" after all this was the 1970s and there was a school of thought that said your sexual preferences were all conscious choices. The event collapsed into laughter when, after trying for an hour, they could not get me hard. The predatory guy kept telling me to relax but I pointed out that if I was more relaxed they could pour me off the sofa (couch).

For me everything was wrong. I presume that they were attractive but male beauty is not something I have ever found easy to recognise. The smells were wrong, I do not mean that they were unwashed but they did not have that (wonderful) scent I find around women. The textures were wrong ... everything was wrong. There was nothing I found sexually stimulating.

Now this friend of a friend might be mistaking the urge to dominate as homosexual but I doubt it. There is also an argument that some men will masturbate using anything and that such masturbation toys can include other people of both sexes; that I can understand, but find hateful. TBH I strongly suspect this foaf should get a pair of water-wings, dive in and be fabulous!

[NewJeffCT]

5. I've never had the urge to have sex with a man

no desire to do that. It's never been a struggle for me. I think this friend of a friend might be struggling with his sexual identity.

But, to me, nothing beats sex with a woman. I don't see men's legs, figures, chests, eyes, smiles, hair, etc as attractive.

I'd say more, but it would probably get my post deleted/hidden by a jury. Feel free to PM me.

[taterguy]

6. Nothing applies to "all" men

However, I suspect that a lot of men have desires that they don't act on, for a variety of reasons, some good and some bad.

[DFW]

7. Not natural for me, but to each his (or her) own

I have plenty of gay friends to whom it is the most natural thing in the world. Fine with me.
I'm cool with them being gay, and they're cool with me being straight.

Why create problems out of thin air? Life's too short.

[bighughdiehl]

8. Um, no

Your buddy is gay or bi.

[Wait Wut]

9. I'm not a straight man...

...but, a straight woman. There was a study many, many years ago that said most men and women will occasionally have whet dreams about the same sex. It went on to say that it isn't an indication of potential homosexuality, but a natural curiosity. But, your friend seems to be taking that to a further extreme by saying it's a natural urge that "all" men struggle with. It may be his way of reaching out for advice. It sounds like he's looking for justification for some confusing feelings by grasping on to "it's normal to feel this way". It is. For some men, not all. The fact that he's a fundie makes this a difficult time for him. I don't envy you.

[Chan790]

10. As a male who falls somewhere on the continuum of sexual orientations close to "straightish"...

but definitely outside of "straight", (I'd rather not get bogged down into a discussion of my sexuality as it's immaterial to the question) I think your foaf is in denial. I don't believe that anybody can define someone else's sexuality for them, but he needs to stop struggling with labels-qua-signifiers and embrace his sexuality whatever it is. It might be more helpful for him to think of himself as:

A guy who enjoys (or would enjoy) ________ with men, does not enjoy (or would not enjoy) _________ with men, is aroused by men, enjoys (or would enjoy) ________ with women, does not enjoy (or would not enjoy) _________ with women, is aroused(?) by women; is as his creator made him, is free to act or not-act as he chooses regarding his sexuality.

[TreasonousBastard]

11. Some guys struggle with it more than others...

Very few men or women are 100% straight or gay-- most of us sit somewhere on a bell curve leaning one way or another. Some lean further to one end or the other. Many, if not most, of us have random thoughts and fantasies about things we aren't all that interested in doing.

And some people take the occasional random thoughts more seriously than others, especially if you believe that even thinking about it is a sure way to hell.