The difference between "complete" and "finished" (humor)

[FakeNoose]

Can anyone tell the difference between " complete" and "finished"?

No dictionary has ever been able to define the difference between these common words.

However, in a linguistic conference held in London England, Thulaseedharan B, an Indian British citizen was the
clever winner. His final challenge was to define the difference between 'Complete' and 'Finished.'

His response was: When you marry the right woman, you are 'Complete.'
If you marry the wrong woman, you are 'Finished.'
And, when the right woman catches you with the wrong woman, you are 'Completely Finished.'
His answer received a five-minute standing ovation.

[longship]

1. That's funny!

R&K

[becca da bakkah]

2. I Believe It Was Zsa Zsa Gabor......

....who once quipped, "A man in love isn't complete until he gets married. Then he's finished!" Or words to that effect.

[red dog 1]

4. Whenever I see Zza Zza Gabor's name I can't help thinking of the time she was on...

..The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson, and she brought out one of her cats to sit on her lap.
(Johnny Carson liked animals, but he wasn't too crazy about cats)

Zza Zza asked Johnny: "Would you like to pet my pussy?"
Johnny replied: "I would, if you'd put that damn cat down!"

[gratuitous]

5. Zsa Zsa was once asked which of the Gabor women was the oldest

"Don't tell anyone," She said, conspiratorily, "but it's Mama."

[red dog 1]

3. K&R

How about the difference between "complete" and "compleat"

Most dictionaries consider "compleat" to be "an archaic spelling of "complete"

The term "compleat" is often used in the titles of handbooks, such as "The Compleat Angler"
or the soon-to-be-published book about Trump called "The Compleat Asshole"

[FakeNoose]

6. Hah! good point

Yes I just thought "compleat" was archaic but meant the same thing.

Thanks!