HomeLatest ThreadsGreatest ThreadsForums & GroupsMy SubscriptionsMy Posts
DU Home » Latest Threads » Forums & Groups » Topics » Activism » Socialist Progressives (Group) » Congressional Seats Sell ...

Tue Nov 4, 2014, 05:32 PM

Congressional Seats Sell for Record Four Billion Dollars

Borowitz Report
Today 11:43 am
By Andy Borowitz

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Congressional seats are on pace to fetch a whopping four billion dollars on Tuesday night, a record-smashing sales figure that has exceeded the expectations of even the most optimistic insiders.

The seats, which include four hundred and thirty-five in the House of Representatives and thirty-six in the Senate, have attracted buyers from a broad spectrum of industries, including investment banking, energy, pharmaceutical, and gun.

“With all of the uncertainty in the world today, the United States Congress is considered a very safe place for the rich to invest their money,” said Charles Michollot, of the auction house Sotheby’s. “Congressional seats are like Manhattan real estate—they aren’t making any more of them.”

But Anton Pickardin, of the rival auction house Christie’s, sounds more skeptical. “I hate to be a wet blanket, but these sales figures lack rhyme and reason,” Pickardin said. “When someone is willing to pay millions of dollars for a pre-owned Mitch McConnell, you know that people have lost their minds.”

More here: http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/congressional-seats-sell-record-four-billion-dollars


(well, sort of ...)

3 replies, 1043 views

Reply to this thread

Back to top Alert abuse

Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
Arrow 3 replies Author Time Post
Reply Congressional Seats Sell for Record Four Billion Dollars (Original post)
TBF Nov 2014 OP
stage left Nov 2014 #1
TBF Nov 2014 #2
stage left Nov 2014 #3

Response to TBF (Original post)

Tue Nov 4, 2014, 07:46 PM

1. K&R

I wonder how much Lindsey Graham went for?

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to stage left (Reply #1)

Tue Nov 4, 2014, 09:08 PM

2. South Carolina is kinda like TX

I wouldn't put it past Graham to be paying the corporations to let him serve ... it's bad out there.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink


Response to TBF (Reply #2)

Tue Nov 4, 2014, 10:06 PM

3. It's bad down here.

I wouldn't put anything past Graham or any of them. All I've got to say right now is the people of SC are just plain stupid and I completely despair of them.

Reply to this post

Back to top Alert abuse Link here Permalink

Reply to this thread