Burned out

[Rittermeister]

So, first of all, forgive me for posting this here, but I figured if anyone knew how I felt, it would be DUers in North Carolina.

My entire family, with the exception of a brother, is dyed-in-the-wool southern conservatives. By that, I mean their political beliefs range from "well, we tried having multiple religions, but we need to go back to just Christianity or else the Muslims are going to take over" to "gee I wish we'd never brought black people to America and wouldn't it be swell if we could just get rid of them all." This is, I suppose, a consequence of growing up in rural piedmont NC. Sadly, they're not lepers; they're fairly representative of the community at large. In my neck of the woods, there's nothing conservatives love better than a good old circle jerk against lib'rals.

What this rant is leading to is that I'm wearing down. For three years I've been challenging the nonsense they bring up, only to be greeted with deflection, stony silence, or insults. I'm to the point that I can't bear to do it; I either lock myself in my room when I'm home, or I have to grind my teeth while they talk sedition and treason. My blood pressure goes up, I'm having stomach problems, it's really exacerbating my mental health issues. What do I do? Do I stop talking to my family entirely?

[OffWithTheirHeads]

1. I stopped talking to my family years ago.

You can't reason with with people who wear ignorance as a badge of honor.

[cantbeserious]

2. Leave - They Won't Change

eom

[NRaleighLiberal]

3. We have family members we "can't go there" with. But they are distant and see them rarely.

I feel lucky - my wife and daughters are all as way-left as I am....and that's pretty much all the family I am in contact with on a regular basis.

Hang in there!

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

4. If people drive you crazy and make you miserable, best to mostly avoid them

even if they are family. Send them Christmas cards, drop in for a short visit once in awhile, but keep your distance. Change the subject when they go off on politics; tell them you don't want to discuss those issues and if they keep it up you'll leave. Then do it.

Life is too short to knowingly subject yourself to stressful situations.

[MADem]

5. Don't let idiots control how you feel.

You can't fix stupid, but you don't have to allow it to harsh your worldview, either.

Tell your family that you don't want to talk politics. Anytime they bring up Ted Cruz, you talk football. Anytime they talk about Eric Cantor, talk about fishing, house painting, lawn mowing, you name it.

If they try to push or goad you, just laugh at them--and change the subject. Keep score in your head--any time you get one of them to change the subject, give yourself a point. When you get to 21, tell yourself you've won!

[Triana]

6. Put them at arm's length as others have suggested...

...and keep them there. Be minimally nice, send cards, help if needed but avoid political discussions and deep involvement of any kind in their lives or family events. Just "don't go there". If they try to egg you on or poke fun in any political sense, cut them off from communications with you and leave it that way. No response. No contact.

You can't fix stupid. You can't reason with stupid. You can't apply facts to stupid and expect anything to change. It won't.

[rdharma]

7. When behind enemy lines, you can either surrender........

.... or organize resistance!

I'm in the same situation. Don't get hateful about it..... but push back!

[blkmusclmachine]

8. I bet they watch Faux Nooz, too. Faux tells them exactly what they WANT to hear. You'll lose, every

time. Sorry.

[gklagan]

9. don't push the river.

Don't engage around politics with them, find the parts of the their personalities you enjoy and build the relationship there instead. Look for liberal activism in your community and get your poli-fix there.

[mmonk]

10. We're having a no political talk Thanksgiving at our house.

Some of the in-laws are righties. We have no desire to engage their crazy talk. I suggest the same for others in getting through the holidays.