Man Went Number Two On Grocery Self-Checkout Scanner

[47of74]

A WTF from Ohio.

A judge yesterday ordered an Ohio man to stay away from the Kroger store where he allegedly stripped naked and defecated on a self-checkout scanner.

Colin Murphy, 23, was arrested early Sunday following a repulsive incident inside the Kroger market in the Hyde Park neighborhood of Cincinnati (where Murphy lives).

According to criminal complaints, Murphy entered the Kroger and “stripped naked in front of” a male employee. The suspect, police noted, smelled of alcohol, had slurred speech, and staggered as he walked.

After disrobing, Murphy “defecated on U-Scan it,” investigators allege.

[Aristus]

1. Florida Man has a rival, Ohio Man, who is closing the crazy-gap.

[MADem]

2. Did he think his poo poos had bar codes on them?

That Kroger needs to give a raise to the poor soul who got stuck cleaning THAT up!

[No Vested Interest]

3. This is my neighborhood grocery. I never use U-Scan, and now

I never will.

[liberal N proud]

4. Ohio is the breeding ground for Florida Man

[Kaleva]

5. Until we shit on a U-Scan it ourselves, we shouldn't judge the guy.