Palestinians plan demos in order to ruin Jewish holidays with tear gas

[shaayecanaan]

Israeli media reports that Jewish settlers are complaining the tear gas from the weekly Friday demos across the West Bank is ruining their Sabbaths. +972 is revealing today that in fact this is a result of a new Palestinian strategy to be shot at during not only Fridays, but ahead of every holiday on the Jewish calendar.

As reported this week, settlers in the West Bank are complaining that tear gas fired at Palestinians during weekly unarmed protests gets carried by the wind to their settlements and creates major discomfort for them on Fridays.

But +972 has found out that this is only the tip of the iceberg. According to anonymous sources, Palestinians are planning to demonstrate on the eve of every Jewish holiday, besides Erev Shabbat, to make the chag as unbearable as they can.

27-year-old “M”, from Nabi Saleh, told +972: “We are interested in making the settlers suffer as much as possible, so we have decided to meet the army head-on every, how you call it – Erev Chag? Inshallah the army will pound us with as much gas as possible. I hope I nearly suffocate.”

http://972mag.com/palestinians-plan-demos-in-order-to-ruin-jewish-holidays-with-tear-gas/71342/


Palestinians plan demos in order to ruin Jewish holidays with tear gas

The rightwing Arutz 7 (aka Israel National News) has a “no, this is not the Onion,” kind of story: Settlers are apparently complaining that tear gas fired at Palestinians during weekly unarmed protests gets carried by the wind to their settlements and creates major discomfort for them on Fridays.

“The effect is very strong, you feel the gas in the mouth,” says a resident of Halamish, the settlement that took over Nabi Saleh‘s land. “It’s hard to function throughout the Shabbat,” he adds. The article states that the tear gas is dangerous for pregnant women and people with breathing disabilities. In a comment to the piece, IDF Spokesperson guarantees that “efforts are made to avoid firing tear gas in the directions of the (Jewish) settlements.”

http://972mag.com/nstt_feeditem/settlers-tear-gas-fired-on-palestinians-ruins-the-weekend/

[MADem]

1. It is satire, apparently. See the disclaimer at the bottom of this article.

Cleverly asymmetrical satire, though--the funny thing is, it could work.

Settlers are already reacting to the news, asking the IDF to respond appropriately. “We demand the IDF cease shooting tear gas canisters at high arcs, since the gas floats much more easily that way in our direction,” said Yehuda Cohen from Halamish. “If the IDF truly cares about Jews and their holidays, they’ll shoot the canisters directly at their bodies, with no arc at all.”

Yocheved Bar-Yehuda, also of Halamish, said that “I swear to God, if my cheese strudel with raisins, from my grandmother’s recipe who survived Auschwitz, even smells of tear gas – I will personally erect a new outpost and call it ‘Givat Cheese,’ or ‘Maale Strudel’.”

The IDF responded, “our guidelines for tear gas fire have not changed: direct fire at Palestinians is allowed only after every B’Tselem camera has been broken. We’re not taking any chances, even if it means some holiday tears.”

(The above is satire)

http://972mag.com/palestinians-plan-demos-in-order-to-ruin-jewish-holidays-with-tear-gas/71342/

[shaayecanaan]

3. I thought someone might take the bait

it generally happens around here.

[MADem]

5. It's really a great asymetrical warfare concept.

Using your adversary's weapons to discomfit his own population.

Very much a ju-jitsu style strategy!

Of course, it would be a trick to get the wind blowing 'just right' all the time.

The quotes were just a bit OTT, but it wasn't as much of a two-by-four in the face, in terms of the satire, as many other efforts from less subtle outlets!

[delrem]

6. Actually it'd be easy to orient a demo upwind of a target. nt

[MADem]

8. It wouldn't surprise me at all if they factored this in to future demos. nt

[delrem]

9. nope. the settlers in fact complain.

[Scootaloo]

4. Based on an actual complaint by settlers

See the second article in OP.

Hundreds of Palestinians and extreme leftist confront each Friday with security forces near Israeli settlements. Forces are forced to respond with riot control measures which include tear gas.

It turns out that these measures ibex to disperse violent demonstrators but on the serious harm the Jewish settlers living in the area.

Many complaints piled up recently on Channel 7 on Saturday residents indicated that "destroyed" them due to gas inhalation. The reason is that the winds carry the gas straight from the scene of the demonstration Jewish settlement in the Palestinian village.

Many people in communities suffer eye irritation, tears, burning sensation in the nose and throat, salivation, feeling of shrinking the chest and suffocation.

Extreme leftists and ibex? Those poor squatters!

[azurnoir]

2. a dastardly plot no doubt

ruin the settlers with teargas

[TomClash]

7. That's pretty funny

And subtle enough for an extra chuckle.