Cross in the Closet: Straight Christian Lives a Year as Gay Man

[closeupready]

I love this story. Rather than lecturing "straight" people, a straight person actually walked our walk. Kind of like Barbara Ehrenreich.

>>In his Nashville Christian church, Timothy Kurek was taught the lesson of God's wrath in the Biblical story of "Sodom and Gomorrah," and he believed that homosexuality was a sin.

"You learned to be very afraid of God," said Kurek. According to the preachings of his church, "The loving thing to do is to tell my friend who is gay, 'Hey, listen, you are an abomination and you need to repent to go to heaven.' I absolutely believed in that lock, stock and barrel."

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But about four years ago, when a lesbian he knew from karaoke night confided to him that her parents had disowned her when she came out, Kurek felt that he failed her.

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Kurek's reaction ate away at him, and he wondered what it felt like to be gay and so alone. So even though Kurek identifies as straight, he embarked on what one religious writer called "spiritual espionage." He would live like a gay man for a year.<<

http://abcnews.go.com/Health/cross-closet-straight-christian-lives-year-gay-man/story?id=17443219

[rfranklin]

1. Just like the guy who "passed" for black back in the 1960s.....

seems kind of patronizing doesn't it?

[hrmjustin]

2. well if it turns someone around from being a bigot, yet it does seem odd.

[HERVEPA]

3. "Black Like Me"

Not the slightest bit patronizing. Did you read the book?

[Smarmie Doofus]

5. And "Gentleman's Agreement" before that.

Gregory Peck. Good stuff.

But for some folks... "Eyes Wide Shut."

It *ALWAYS* "Eyes Wide Shut".

[closeupready]

4. No, it doesn't seem patronizing at all to me.

Unless you are arguing that people who claim to be 'straight' are really bisexual, and just lying in deference to traditional society's demand for all heterosexuality/all the time.

Can you explain what you mean? Not attacking you; I respectfully welcome all points of view, even those who disagree.

[Plantaganet]

8. Very much so.

But I hope the safari was at least educational. Now, of course, he can return to his universe of privilege.

[William769]

6. I have mixes feelings about this but am recommending for good intentions

of at least trying to walk in our shoe's.

What I mean by this is I applaud him for doing it but there is just that nagging feeling in the back of your head you just can't experience unless you are actually Gay.

[closeupready]

7. Agreed. It would be like if I cross-dressed -

I have absolutely no desire to do so - I am a man, I like being a man, I like men - but it would be interesting and enlightening to go around town (as some of my cross-dressing friends do) seeing what life is like in another way of existing. It would at times be very difficult, but if you are committed to it, you'd just tough it out, and account for it - at the end of that experiment - in your overall assessment.

[isafakir]

10. i cross dressed once

i did cross dress once. some other gay friends helped me. i hated it. i thought it would be camp. for me it wasn't. i was a beautiful girl in drag. but everything about it made me uncomfortable, makeup garters permanent bra all made me feel faked out, not myself, and straight guys, whom i would have loved to get it on with, were just plain nasty. not people. invade your space. don't hear you. reduce you to something like a dog's chew toy. i tried it for several days but by the end of day two, i quit. literally, i don't know how women put up with men. i certainly could bear wearing the make up and the clothes. i would eventually punch out the men.

[closeupready]

11. That's an interesting experience;

sign of character.

[left-of-center2012]

9. I need give this more thought

So many gays believe they have to pretend to be straight.
This straight guy pretended to be gay ... for research?

[closeupready]

12. This is what I love about this DU Group -

whereas I've been told (in Meta) that I am "rude", we here in GLBT can disagree amicably.

I was going to go off on a personal tangent, but upon reflection, I realize that's not necessary.

Basically, I see what he did as similar to the kind of thing that Sybil did in adopting different personalities. She was mentally ill, of course, and she was a captive of her abusive environment, compounding her schizophrenia. What this guy did - in a more benign way than Sybil's experience - was to adopt a persona that made OUR reality HIS reality.

We probably ALL do this to some degree or other - for example, you behave one way when you are with your parents, and another when you are with your friends - but he did it even when it came to costing him dearly on a personal level.

It would be patronizing if he had done it only if it came at NO personal cost, or if he stopped at the first social paper cut.

To the contrary, he lost friends, he became dead to his society. That's the opposite of patronizing; it's empathic.