Women's Rights & Issues
Related: About this forumHow to Really Defend Planned Parenthood
How to Really Defend Planned ParenthoodWHY does the pro-choice movement so often find itself in a defensive crouch?
I cringed as I watched Planned Parenthoods president, Cecile Richards, apologize in a YouTube video last month for the lack of compassion in two doctors language at supposed business lunches arranged and secretly recorded by the anti-abortion Center for Medical Progress.
Not because she wasnt eloquent, but because of what her words said about the impossibly narrow path abortion providers now are forced to walk. After all, have you ever heard an apology from a crisis pregnancy center for masquerading as an abortion clinic? What about the women in Texas who lost access to gynecological care when the state defunded Planned Parenthood and did not, as promised, adequately replace its services? Has anyone said sorry about that?
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There are two reasons abortion rights activists have been boxed in. One is that weve been reactive rather than proactive. To deflect immediate attacks, we fall in with messaging that unconsciously encodes the vision of the other side. Abortion opponents say women seek abortions in haste and confusion. Pro-choicers reply: Abortion is the most difficult, agonizing decision a woman ever makes. Opponents say: Women have abortions because they have irresponsible sex. We say: rape, incest, fatal fetal abnormalities, life-risking pregnancies.
These responses arent false exactly. Some women are genuinely ambivalent; some pregnancies are particularly dangerous. But they leave out a large majority of women seeking abortions, who had sex willingly, made a decision to end the pregnancy and faced no special threatening medical conditions.
We need to say that women have sex, have abortions, are at peace with the decision and move on with their lives. We need to say that is their right, and, moreover, its good for everyone that they have this right: The whole society benefits when motherhood is voluntary. When we gloss over these truths we unintentionally promote the very stigma were trying to combat. What, you didnt agonize? You forgot your pill? You just didnt want to have a baby now? You should be ashamed of yourself.
The second reason were stuck in a defensive mode is that too many pro-choice people are way too quiet. According to the Guttmacher Institute, nearly one in three women will have had at least one abortion by the time she reaches menopause. I suspect most of those women had someone who helped them, too a husband or boyfriend, a friend, a parent. Where are those people? The couple who decided two kids were enough, the grad student who didnt want to be tied for life to an ex-boyfriend, the woman barely getting by on a fast-food job? Why dont we hear more from them?
Its not that they think they did something wrong: A recent study published in the journal PLOS One finds that more than 95 percent of women felt the abortion was the right decision, both immediately after the procedure and three years later. Theyve been shamed into silence by stigma. Abortion opponents are delighted to fill that silence with testimony from their own ranks: the tiny minority of women who say theyre plagued by regret, rape victims glad they chose to continue their pregnancies, women who rejected their doctors advice to end a pregnancy and look at these adorable baby pictures! everything turned out fine.
Make no mistake: Those voices are heard in high places. In his 2007 Supreme Court decision upholding the Partial-Birth Abortion Ban Act, Justice Anthony M. Kennedy specifically mentioned the unexceptionable likelihood that a woman might come to regret her choice. That women need to be protected from decisions they might feel bad about later not that there was any evidence supporting this notion is now a legal precedent.
It is understandable that women who have ended pregnancies just wanted to move on. Why should they define themselves publicly by one private decision, perhaps made long ago? Ill tell you why: because the pro-choice movement cannot flourish if the mass of women it serves that one in three look on as if the struggle has nothing to do with them. Without the voices and support of millions of ordinary women behind them, providers and advocates can be too easily dismissed as ideologues out of touch with the American people.
Women arent the only ones who need to speak up. Where are the men grateful not to be forced into fatherhood? Where are the doctors who object to the way anti-abortion lawmakers are interfering with the practice of medicine?
Read more: http://www.nytimes.com/2015/08/05/opinion/how-to-really-defend-planned-parenthood.html
daleanime
(17,796 posts)Kath1
(4,309 posts)Excellent post.
I just think the topic makes people uncomfortable. I often bring it up and I can tell a lot of people want to avoid the topic. This is even with pro-choice 20-somethings I work with who take Roe v. Wade for granted. I keep telling them that we all need to speak up.
I actually do know quite a few RNs who are pro-choice and VERY vocal about it.
I think there are enough people who will defend PP, but so many more should stand up.
Novara
(5,842 posts)We were young (18-21) and we knew now wasn't the time to be tied down, so we kept our abortion funds in reserve. We talked about it. We drove each other home and we nursed each other through them. We didn't pass any judgment and there was no stigma. This was in the late 70s - early 80s. None of us planned to be pregnant and we all used birth control. But we knew that sometimes despite precautions, the unthinkable happened. Many of my friends had abortions. I didn't, but I was prepared, just in case. I knew where to go and I had money saved up. It was just something we all took for granted at the time. No judgment, no stigma. We talked about it and shared our stories with each other.
The defensiveness of abortion supporters pisses me right the fuck off. We don't have to be apologetic, we don't have to couch our support in bullshit like "abortions should be legal but rare." It's a constitutionally-protected right and a good choice for many women who cannot have a child for one reason or another. There should be no stigma. There should be no shame. Feeling embarrassed, ashamed, and keeping quiet about abortion only feeds into their narrative. When we do that, they win. WE DON'T HAVE TO DO THAT.
niyad
(113,302 posts)these are OUR bodies, OUR lives. PERIOD.