Anyone familiar with acoustic neuroma?

[leftyladyfrommo]

I have a friend who had this benign tumor behind her ear. She had gamma knife surgery. This was about 7 years ago.

The tumor quit growing and the really troubling symptoms improved: She had lost feeling in the side of her face and mouth. She still has severe hearing loss in that ear and that side of her face droops a little but she has regained the feeling in her face and mouth.

But here we are 7 years later and she is just a mess. She has no energy to do anything. Her house looks like a hoarder house. She just sits there most of the day watching TV reruns that she has seen many times. She has lost all interest in everything.

She calls me over and over during the day and just goes on and on about nothing. I think she suffers from pretty severe anxiety and she likes to hear the sound of my voice. She just rambles on and on. It's driving me crazy. But I also realize that she has a brain tumor.

Everything I can find about gamma knife treatment is just glowing. Wonderful results, no real long term after effects. But I just don't believe that anymore. She is a mess and her life is pretty much ruined. She won't listen to anything I say. In fact if I do make any kind of suggestions she just immediately comes up with an argument and then does the opposite. So I don't say anything much any more. I just let her ramble on.

Help! I don't know what to do. I've known her for about 30 years and did not used to be like this. I want to be a friend but I just don't know how much longer I can stand this stuff.

[Nay]

1. Can you get her to go to a doc to determine what exactly is causing her

behavior? I wouldn't assume it was the gamma knife. It sounds to me like her tumor may be growing and pushing on areas in her brain. She does need to see a doc immediately.

[Galileo126]

2. My brother has an acoustic neuroma

He went under the gamma knife too. That was about 12 yrs ago. While the tumor stopped growing, it has been changing shape. This causes my brother's face to get numb, or downright painful. He takes anti-psychotic drugs to quell any seizures. (He's only had one in 12 yrs).

It sounds like your friend is suffering something psychological. There is a helplessness that comes with such a diagnosis. "I can't get this thing out of my head, and operating is not an option!!!" My brother goes through this from time to time.

Incidentally, My uncle had one too. He died from the post-operative infection, which is why going under the knife is commonly ruled out today. That weighs heavy on my brother, but he's doing relatively well. He's accepted his "situation" and just has a "fuck it" attitude now.

However, having your friend see a doctor is always a good idea - if anything, for the reassurance.

Best of luck with your friend!

[leftyladyfrommo]

7. That Gamma Knife surgery cost $40,000.

She went in to the hospital in the morning and came out that afternoon and the bill was $40,000. Her insurance paid but gee whiz.

[uppityperson]

3. I agree with Nay, she needs a checkup to make sure the tumor isn't causing problems as

her behavior could be from a number of reasons, even clinical depression. It is difficult, both being like that and dealing with someone life that. Good luck to you both. if she's not had a checkup, that's be a good pace to start to make sure something else isn't going on

[TwilightGardener]

4. My husband has had pretty dramatic hearing loss in one ear (he has

to get his hearing regularly evaluated for noise-related work reasons), so we suspect it's possible he might have an acoustic neuroma, he's going to have it checked out at some point. That said, your friend's problems probably aren't related to her neuroma, it's not really the sort of tumor that would cause changes in her mental or emotional status, from what I understand. She needs to be evaluated for medical problems and then psychological problems, fairly quickly. If you know her family, you should call them and express your concerns. I will say, my mother had a friend who developed dementia, and a notable effect of that was that she started calling my mother ALL THE TIME. They had been casual get-together-once-every-couple-months-for-lunch type friends, not call-several-times-a-day friends, so this was an alarming change.

[leftyladyfrommo]

8. She keeps in touch with her family.

And I think she calls and goes on and on with them, too. And they know what her awful house is like. But she has a temperament that is very hard to deal with. If you disagree with her or make any suggestions she just goes off.

But she has been like that for ever. She got fired from one job for getting made and throwing a chair across the room. She has always been really different. She is just more so now. Her job used to keep her mind busy during the day. Now that she isn't working she just sits around and makes herself crazy.

An idle mind is a real problem.

[leftyladyfrommo]

5. Stillwaiting

I tried to reply to you but screwed up. I'll try again tomorrow.

Thank you so much for your kind reply.

[leftyladyfrommo]

6. Thank you everyone for your replies.

I think her doctor is about half there. She goes and he just doesn't take her problems seriously. I told her to tell him that she has no energy. He did some blood work and her Vit. D was really low so she took some D for a while. I don't think it helped.

She also goes every so often and has another MRI. So far the tumor is not growing. But she says she always feel like she has a tree branch in her brain. I know it bothers her.

She is also diabetic and takes meds for that.

I'm sure she must be depressed but if I tried to tell her that she would just really go off.

Why can't I find a normal friend?