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I am dying. (Original Post) murielm99 Dec 2023 OP
So very sorry. SleeplessinSoCal Dec 2023 #1
☹️ underpants Dec 2023 #2
Holding you in love and light. Your DU family is here for you. Lean as hard niyad Dec 2023 #3
Oh my. leftieNanner Dec 2023 #4
Damn gay texan Dec 2023 #5
Make every minute count duhneece Dec 2023 #6
I don't know. murielm99 Dec 2023 #7
And that's perfectly alright. stopdiggin Dec 2023 #46
If you are a hard worker please do so! pazzyanne Dec 2023 #51
Sorry for you about your conditon Bernardo de La Paz Dec 2023 #125
((muriel)) blm Dec 2023 #8
Muriel, holding you in my heart. cilla4progress Dec 2023 #9
I'm so sorry, muriel. brer cat Dec 2023 #10
There are no words sufficient, but the caring is here... hlthe2b Dec 2023 #11
I am so sorry, please keep us updated,we care about you Walleye Dec 2023 #12
That's heartbreaking. lapucelle Dec 2023 #13
Please contact hospice, TNNurse Dec 2023 #14
Hospice rambler_american Dec 2023 #60
I'm a big fan of hospice care and both my parents were lucky enough to be cared for summer_in_TX Dec 2023 #117
Holding you in love and light. onecaliberal Dec 2023 #15
Thinking of you! colorado_ufo Dec 2023 #16
Sending strength and love democrank Dec 2023 #17
So, so, sorry. Elessar Zappa Dec 2023 #18
I'm holding you in my heart. LastLiberal in PalmSprings Dec 2023 #19
You need a big hug snowybirdie Dec 2023 #20
Hang in there please, we need you. FailureToCommunicate Dec 2023 #21
prayers for you! LymphocyteLover Dec 2023 #22
Heartbreaking. LoisB Dec 2023 #23
If you've had a great run wasn't it all worth it? NoMoreRepugs Dec 2023 #24
Sending you love BittyJenkins Dec 2023 #25
Oh no. So very sorry. I think you mentioned lung cancer in a previous post. TeamProg Dec 2023 #26
Sorry to hear this. Best of Wishes to You marked50 Dec 2023 #27
I'm sorry. Ocelot II Dec 2023 #28
Check Joe Tippens Cancer Story & Fen Ben Cancer Support Group on FB MartyTheGreek Dec 2023 #29
I love postive stories....there's always hope. Thanks for posting. Peregrine Took Dec 2023 #50
I'm so sorry, muriel ms liberty Dec 2023 #30
I'm holding you close in my heart. Goddessartist Dec 2023 #31
All Love and Light to You, muriel DarthDem Dec 2023 #32
Bless PlutosHeart Dec 2023 #33
I am so sorry. pandr32 Dec 2023 #34
I'm so sorry. We are here for you. And I've read so many stories highplainsdem Dec 2023 #35
So sorry,...... 70sEraVet Dec 2023 #36
So sorry to read....I'm 70 and I know I've got a limited amount of time left on my clock. OAITW r.2.0 Dec 2023 #37
Om mani padme hum Ponietz Dec 2023 #38
Oh, Muriel Wicked Blue Dec 2023 #39
Try to be strong! Grumpy Old Guy Dec 2023 #40
Thinking good thoughts for you... MiHale Dec 2023 #41
So sorry. Scottie Mom Dec 2023 #42
Leave some of yourself behind via the written word. Jeebo Dec 2023 #43
Peace and Love to you Murielm99. chowder66 Dec 2023 #44
Sending love Wild blueberry Dec 2023 #45
Pouring love and strength into thoughts of you, murielm99... TygrBright Dec 2023 #47
Oh Muriel. 💙💙💙 sheshe2 Dec 2023 #48
. NewHendoLib Dec 2023 #49
My condolences yankee87 Dec 2023 #52
Hugs Duncanpup Dec 2023 #53
Holding you in the light Jilly_in_VA Dec 2023 #54
Joining you in this, BlueSky3 Dec 2023 #63
What they all said. You are loved. twodogsbarking Dec 2023 #55
Sending you love, light and comfort.❤ virgdem Dec 2023 #56
I'm so sorry LittleGirl Dec 2023 #57
Wishing. you peace and hope. madaboutharry Dec 2023 #58
Good luck lass. Will be thinking of you. mahina Dec 2023 #59
Hugs, hugs... 2naSalit Dec 2023 #61
Crushing news for you. Sending thoughts of healing and love to you. Fla Dem Dec 2023 #62
So sorry to hear this wryter2000 Dec 2023 #64
But you will live on BaronChocula Dec 2023 #65
That is very hard to hear. ismnotwasm Dec 2023 #66
It is good you've reached justaprogressive Dec 2023 #67
Never ever give up The Mouth Dec 2023 #68
Well, shit. Warpy Dec 2023 #69
I'm sorry. cate94 Dec 2023 #70
Murielm99 SYGDeb Dec 2023 #71
May peace and light find you and your love live long.💛 58Sunliner Dec 2023 #72
sending positive vibes to you BlueTexasMan Dec 2023 #73
I am so sorry. herding cats Dec 2023 #74
We're here on DU listening Mersky Dec 2023 #75
I'm so sorry XanaDUer2 Dec 2023 #76
Find out what your options are. Consider a second opinion at a comprehensive center. JohnSJ Dec 2023 #77
Hope you can hold out long enough to find some peace, Bayard Dec 2023 #78
Sending you love and hugs, murielm99 gademocrat7 Dec 2023 #79
Oh Muriel.. I'm so sorry to see this.. mountain grammy Dec 2023 #80
(((muriel99))) BumRushDaShow Dec 2023 #81
Are you sure? barbtries Dec 2023 #82
Oh no. I'm so sorry. yardwork Dec 2023 #83
May your new journey be all that you hoped for. LakeArenal Dec 2023 #84
... William769 Dec 2023 #85
(((Hugs))) My thoughts are with you and your loved ones. applegrove Dec 2023 #86
💙🙏 Richluu Dec 2023 #87
A wiser man than I once said: DFW Dec 2023 #88
Heartache to hear that. In my mind you are connected to my mother's cousin Muriel. lostnfound Dec 2023 #89
May your spirit soar and may we meet Joinfortmill Dec 2023 #90
So sorry IbogaProject Dec 2023 #91
Oh Muriel. Like all of us here, I hoped the news would be better. femmedem Dec 2023 #92
I'm sorry for your news Marthe48 Dec 2023 #93
❤️ louslobbs Dec 2023 #94
Wishing you peace and everlasting strength muriem99. kairos12 Dec 2023 #95
Sending you much love Alliepoo Dec 2023 #96
A prayer has been said for you. creeksneakers2 Dec 2023 #97
May you find the light and peace mercuryblues Dec 2023 #98
I'm so sorry . . . SarcasticSatyr Dec 2023 #99
Sending you love and comfort. MLAA Dec 2023 #100
All our love Muriel. I hold out hope and offer a big DU hug at this time. Evolve Dammit Dec 2023 #101
I'm so sorry. area51 Dec 2023 #102
we are here for you murielm899 Skittles Dec 2023 #103
No words DownriverDem Dec 2023 #104
Very sorry to hear that. JPPaverage Dec 2023 #105
Sending love and hugs. SunSeeker Dec 2023 #106
I'm so sorry to hear about what you're going through, Murielm99. Unknown Beatle Dec 2023 #107
My heart is with you Permanut Dec 2023 #108
My heart C OH Dem Dec 2023 #109
Hugs to you. Eko Dec 2023 #110
I am so sorry LetMyPeopleVote Dec 2023 #111
It is something one can't do unless one has lived. I trust and hope that you have lived well and will have peace... NNadir Dec 2023 #112
I'm so sorry. I wish you love and light.... CousinIT Dec 2023 #113
I'm sorry Bettie Dec 2023 #114
My heart goes out to you. ProudMNDemocrat Dec 2023 #115
Thank you for fighting the good fight with us, Muriel. Trueblue Texan Dec 2023 #116
As a fellow Illinoisan.. raising2moredems Dec 2023 #118
So sorry stage left Dec 2023 #119
(((murielm99))) my heart and hope are with you. ancianita Dec 2023 #120
I will keep you in my prayers SallyHemmings Dec 2023 #121
no words can change how you feel purr-rat beauty Dec 2023 #122
You are loved, muriellem99. mia Dec 2023 #123
So sorry to hear this! Mad_Dem_X Dec 2023 #124
I'm sorry to hear you are going through all this. Bluethroughu Dec 2023 #126
Muriel, how are things today. What is happening now? Scrivener7 Dec 2023 #127
I am so very sorry, murielm! My heart goes out to you and your loved ones. LaMouffette Dec 2023 #128
(((murielm))) salin Dec 2023 #129
((((((murielm99)))))) SYFROYH Dec 2023 #130
My heart is with you, Muriel. Sparkly Dec 2023 #131
Still praying and sending love. salin Dec 2023 #132
I am so very sorry ailsagirl Dec 2023 #133

duhneece

(4,113 posts)
6. Make every minute count
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 11:46 AM
Dec 2023

At 72, I think about dying… maybe too much.
I don’t want any family members to die… and that includes my DU family, members of whom are closer than some of my ‘legal’ or blood family.
I’m so sorry. How can I help?

stopdiggin

(11,314 posts)
46. And that's perfectly alright.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:48 PM
Dec 2023

Kick a couple of doors .. (and maybe a few of your less favorite people)
It ain't fair - and you have a right to be pissed!

pazzyanne

(6,556 posts)
51. If you are a hard worker please do so!
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:54 PM
Dec 2023

Listen to your doctor when you meet. Ask questions - lots of them! Get a second opinion. Follow your treatment plan closely. Do the things that are recommended. This comes from someone who was diagnosed in 2015 with a fatal autoimmune disease and told I had 5 to 15 months to live. My doctor was a fighter who put together a specialist team immediately. Following the steps above and living my life one day at a time working on things that were left for me to do, I'm still here. Tough days, but good ones as well! I'm wholeheartedly wishing the same for you! Good luck and know that we are all with you in spirit. Hugs and Encouragement on their way to you. Using hospice is on my future plans as well, and finding a support group is important.

Bernardo de La Paz

(49,002 posts)
125. Sorry for you about your conditon
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 09:51 AM
Dec 2023

Anger is a very understandable, natural response, but anger will not help anybody, least of all you.

Forgive yourself, forgive your condition, do the best you can letting go of the self-destructive anger as soon as you can. Perhaps replace it with cold determination to do as much of that "too much to do" as you can. I'm sure even Norman Lear dying at 101 had more to do. We all do. We all get more done without anger. Anger is partially motivating and partially dulls our primary tool, intellect. On balance, cold determination gets more done.

Best wishes.

cilla4progress

(24,736 posts)
9. Muriel, holding you in my heart.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 11:49 AM
Dec 2023

What do you wish to share with us here?

Sending healing thoughts.

❤️❤️❤️

hlthe2b

(102,284 posts)
11. There are no words sufficient, but the caring is here...
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 11:53 AM
Dec 2023

I can only hope your days are filled with love and happiness and extend far into the future, no matter what you might think today. And yes, please. When the anger and shock diminish a bit, I can only hope that a determination to make every day count will take their place.

summer_in_TX

(2,739 posts)
117. I'm a big fan of hospice care and both my parents were lucky enough to be cared for
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 12:16 AM
Dec 2023

in their home where they wanted to be until they died.

But it should be at the point where you choose no further intervention. They replace your medical care and interventions designed to restore health and focus on palliative care to keep you comfortable and able to live the rest of your time well.

Mom went quickly (two days after she came home from the hospital following a stroke and heart attack). Dad went almost ten months after entering hospice. We got to be with them and to shower them with love, instead of having them whisked away by hospital staff trying to save their lives past when it was possible for them to enjoy any quality of living and where we couldn't be with them while they worked on them.

🙏🏽


TeamProg

(6,135 posts)
26. Oh no. So very sorry. I think you mentioned lung cancer in a previous post.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 12:45 PM
Dec 2023

One of my best friends is fighting “Charlie” with chemo. That’s the name he gave to his stage three pancreatic cancer so to psychologically separate the cancer from his own physical being. He did nothing wrong but perhaps overeat most of his life.

Are there any better treatments for you or answers to be found?

MartyTheGreek

(565 posts)
29. Check Joe Tippens Cancer Story & Fen Ben Cancer Support Group on FB
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 12:51 PM
Dec 2023

I'm not an experiencer but read more better outcome late stage stories than not.

DarthDem

(5,255 posts)
32. All Love and Light to You, muriel
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 12:58 PM
Dec 2023

I am hoping for the very best for you - maybe the news is not what you fear. Please let us know.

pandr32

(11,586 posts)
34. I am so sorry.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:14 PM
Dec 2023

You must be going through a lot of fear and anger. I hope you have enough time to make your own arrangements and say good-bye to those whom you care about.

highplainsdem

(48,993 posts)
35. I'm so sorry. We are here for you. And I've read so many stories
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:17 PM
Dec 2023

of new treatments being found, and unexplained healings, that I never give up hope.

I'm not religious, but I believe, based on everything I've read and heard (including from a lot of people I knew personally), that our spirits live on, and there are reunions with loved ones who've already crossed over.

I realize that can't change the anger when there's still so much more that you want to do here (as you mentioned in reply 7), and I hope you'll have years more here. But all of us are going to make that transition. I'm praying for the best possible medical care and emotional support for you.

And please remember that those you love, who know what matters to you, are almost certainly already continuing along paths similar to the one you chose, with many of the same goals you chose. You've mattered to them. You've had an impact, and always will. They're your partners in that work you still want to do. I hope you'll be able to feel more and more appreciation of that, and be reminded of their appreciation of you.

We all have limited time here, but I'm wishing you as much more time as possible, and as much love and peace as possible.

OAITW r.2.0

(24,504 posts)
37. So sorry to read....I'm 70 and I know I've got a limited amount of time left on my clock.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:19 PM
Dec 2023

I don't know how I would handle a diagnosis that is terminal. God bless you.

Jeebo

(2,025 posts)
43. Leave some of yourself behind via the written word.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:33 PM
Dec 2023

I am 74 in 13 days and I think about my mortality all the time. Another thing I think about often is that in my lifetime, I have had unique experiences that have taught me unique life lessons. Those personal experiences have taught me lessons in what my father used to call the "College of Hard Knocks" and I think I should write those lessons down and pass them along to others so that what I have learned from those lessons does not die with me. I am not talking about writing my autobiography or anything elaborate like that, but just write it down in the form of lengthy letters to friends and family so that after I go, they will still know and understand who I am. And I say "am" instead of "was" because the written word is one way to keep yourself alive forever in a sense by passing along a form of your identity and consciousness to those who will be aware of who you are. And who will never forget who you are. This is kind of hard to articulate, but I have been thinking about doing this myself for a long time but just have been procrastinating. If your days are numbered, I think this will be a good way for you to use them. I should stop procrastinating and do that myself; Lord knows there are life lessons I would like to pass along to friends and family so that those life lessons don't die with me. To keep what I have learned about life and the real world alive even if I can't keep my physical body alive. I hope that advice helps you.

-- Ron

TygrBright

(20,760 posts)
47. Pouring love and strength into thoughts of you, murielm99...
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 01:50 PM
Dec 2023

Your DU family is here.

We love you.

Rage against the dying of the Light... you never know which moments of your life will be the ones to transcend the known and ordinary.

lovingly,
Bright

madaboutharry

(40,212 posts)
58. Wishing. you peace and hope.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 02:09 PM
Dec 2023

I don't know what else to say other than I am very sorry and that I hope you are with those who love you.

mahina

(17,663 posts)
59. Good luck lass. Will be thinking of you.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 02:11 PM
Dec 2023

Sending you aloha, wishing comfort and peace of mind, and wellbeing.

2naSalit

(86,643 posts)
61. Hugs, hugs...
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 02:22 PM
Dec 2023

And more hugs.

All I can send are vibes to give you strength and comfort, I hope they help in some way.

Fla Dem

(23,679 posts)
62. Crushing news for you. Sending thoughts of healing and love to you.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 02:42 PM
Dec 2023

Lean on friends and family as you travel this road. Do not walk alone.

ismnotwasm

(41,986 posts)
66. That is very hard to hear.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 03:08 PM
Dec 2023

Know then, you have my deepest admiration and respect.
Whatever way your journey takes you, you have been impactful and added meaning and depth.

justaprogressive

(2,190 posts)
67. It is good you've reached
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 03:11 PM
Dec 2023
the anger stage

Make your bucket list.

The battle between mind and body can be prolonged by
a determined attitude!

Prioritize and do!


Call on us for support anytime.



(retired Long Term Care nurse)



 

SYGDeb

(84 posts)
71. Murielm99
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:05 PM
Dec 2023

I am so sorry. I have cancer..too. My doctor is switching me from Jakafi to a different medication.

BlueTexasMan

(165 posts)
73. sending positive vibes to you
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:12 PM
Dec 2023

One way you get the rest you need, the other way you get a new adventure. Win/win
Peace be with you.

Mersky

(4,982 posts)
75. We're here on DU listening
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:30 PM
Dec 2023

All wishing we could be right by your side.

Have known your handle and voice for 20 years, and would be there if I could to ask questions, push for more tests, and faster.

XanaDUer2

(10,680 posts)
76. I'm so sorry
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:45 PM
Dec 2023

That's all I know how to say. That being said, there are amazing treatments now. Holding you in love and light.

JohnSJ

(92,213 posts)
77. Find out what your options are. Consider a second opinion at a comprehensive center.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:48 PM
Dec 2023

Last edited Thu Dec 7, 2023, 10:32 AM - Edit history (1)

Sending you positive vibes, thoughts and prayers

Bayard

(22,075 posts)
78. Hope you can hold out long enough to find some peace,
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 04:48 PM
Dec 2023

And finish your bucket list.

Please keep us posted. Love and light.

barbtries

(28,798 posts)
82. Are you sure?
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 05:08 PM
Dec 2023

By now you've seen the doctor. Are you certain there's no hope murielm999??



sending loving energy to lighten your load.

DFW

(54,399 posts)
88. A wiser man than I once said:
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 05:51 PM
Dec 2023

“It ain’t over ‘til it’s over.”

Make plans, do stuff while you still can. Confound their pessimistic diagnosis to the point where they exclaim, “what? You’re still here?”

lostnfound

(16,179 posts)
89. Heartache to hear that. In my mind you are connected to my mother's cousin Muriel.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 05:56 PM
Dec 2023

It’s a lovely name. You strike me as a lovely, good hearted, open-hearted person.
I’ve grown quite attached to you through your posts.

So I will say a prayer for you tonight.

May you be allowed to live each day to its fullest, may you share your wisdom and strength with many. Guess we are all cousins thought] in this world..

IbogaProject

(2,816 posts)
91. So sorry
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 06:17 PM
Dec 2023

Maybe get a second opinion? If you decide to end treatment you will likely qualify for hospice care and be able to stay in your home, even if you aren't there yet maybe check it out, that one is covered by medicare and isn't like going on medicaid for being in a nursing home.

femmedem

(8,203 posts)
92. Oh Muriel. Like all of us here, I hoped the news would be better.
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 06:29 PM
Dec 2023

Life is so precious and so short.

When my time comes, I don't know if I will be able to face losing this miraculous world with any grace. My heart goes out to you.

louslobbs

(3,235 posts)
94. ❤️
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 07:03 PM
Dec 2023

😢❤️?🩹 my mom got her breast cancer diagnosis when she was 50, she went into remission twice and finally it metastasized to her brain and she died at 56. I wouldn’t have missed those 6 years for anything in the world. No matter what, please keep fighting! My mom used her anger about the situation to keep fighting…..whatever it takes Muriel. Thinking of you…..
With love,
Lou (Frank)

NNadir

(33,523 posts)
112. It is something one can't do unless one has lived. I trust and hope that you have lived well and will have peace...
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 11:35 PM
Dec 2023

...in passing.

Deepest sympathy.

CousinIT

(9,247 posts)
113. I'm so sorry. I wish you love and light....
Wed Dec 6, 2023, 11:53 PM
Dec 2023

...and a gentle peaceful, painless passing surrounded by love at both ends.

raising2moredems

(639 posts)
118. As a fellow Illinoisan..
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 12:22 AM
Dec 2023

I'm here for you for whatever hand you're dealt. I know we've both been election judges (and sad to say in maggats precincts but we are warrior supporters of democracy). A bit sad we've never been able to meet up but there is a supreme being somewhere. So we might.

mia

(8,361 posts)
123. You are loved, muriellem99.
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 08:34 AM
Dec 2023

May the support expressed in this post bring you some comfort. One day we will all be where you are at this moment. Thank you for sharing how you are thinking and feeling. I wish that I could offer you more.

Bluethroughu

(5,172 posts)
126. I'm sorry to hear you are going through all this.
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 09:58 AM
Dec 2023

Do whatever you want, go where ever you want, eat whatever you want and say whatever you want.

It's your time and make every moment count.

You are not alone, when you have friends.
Let love and light fill you up.

Scrivener7

(50,954 posts)
127. Muriel, how are things today. What is happening now?
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 10:01 AM
Dec 2023

TNNurse's suggestion to contact hospice is a good one. Are you able to do that?

I wish we could all be there to hold your hand. It must be terribly frightening. That said, we will all follow you down that path sometime.

I wish for a comfortable transition for you.

LaMouffette

(2,035 posts)
128. I am so very sorry, murielm! My heart goes out to you and your loved ones.
Thu Dec 7, 2023, 10:10 AM
Dec 2023

I don't know your religious affiliation, if any, but one thing that brings me a great deal of comfort is learning about the near-death experiences of others, through books and through videos online. The TV series I Survived: Beyond and Back is especially reassuring.

Peace and comfort to you as you process this next step of your journey, muriel!

Latest Discussions»Support Forums»Cancer Support»I am dying.