What the hell happened?

[Not Heidi]

Last Friday (Jan. 26) I was discharged from a partial hospitalization program. I'd been in it for five months. I was there primarily for depression, ADHD, and anxiety. I learned a great deal.

I'd posed the question of discharge to my case manager. He told me that the treatment team had come to the conclusion that it was time for me to go. I can't say I was elated, but I was glad.

This morning, on my fourth day after discharge, I awoke deeply depressed. I crapped out on my guitar lesson, and I'm going to have to force myself out of the house for PT and some medical tests.

Now, I've taken my morning meds, and I hope they'll give me a boost (especially the ADHD drug). I'm going to force myself to action today, and hope I'm able to sustain it.

I'd be grateful for your suggestions.

[irisblue]

1. Do you have an accountability buddy/person who can listen to you when you need it

Or push you when you need to be pushed?
Sort of like a 12 Step Sponsor?

[Not Heidi]

6. No.

That's a good idea.

I left the program with many friends and the phone numbers of the more stable ones.* We plan to keep in touch, part of which we've agreed will be checking up on each other.

Thank you, irisblue.

* Also, several unstable people gave me their numbers. Perhaps it sounds cruel, but I won't be calling them. I don't need the downers I'm sure to hear. (After five months, I know these folks.)

[1WorldHope]

2. One foot in front of the other, and stay in the moment.

You deserve a good life. You can do this!

[Not Heidi]

7. Wonderful words

Thank you, 1WorldHope.

[1WorldHope]

11. You are so welcome.

Breathe in Peace
Breathe out Love. 🕉️

[drthais]

3. a suggestion

just keep moving.
One step at a time.
move forward.

If there's anyone to visit, visit them or have them to the house.

Go out to lunch; yes, by yourself.
bring a newspaper or a book.

have a goal for the evening; reading, watching a specific tv show....

and smile at anyone you see

[Not Heidi]

8. Excellent

Thank you, drthais. All of this is good advice. (I especially appreciate your advice to go out to lunch by myself; Mimi's French onion soup has been calling out to me.)

"Just keep moving" reminds me of a life motto I adopted after seeing "Finding Nemo:"

just keep swimming
just keep swimming
just keep swimming
what do we do
we swi-i-i-im
just keep swimming . . .

[Irish_Dem]

14. I like the idea of going out to lunch by yourself.

It is a way to get out of the house and also a nice treat.

I like to do this and people watch. Or read.

Stay in the moment, appreciate how you are being good to yourself.
The food, the restaurant, the wait staff, the other people in the restaurant.

If you are not up to a solo activity, a friend could join you.

[Irish_Dem]

4. You should have been referred to an outpatient therapist who will follow up with you.

A PH program should not just discharge you without a safety net.
If they didn't do this, arrange to see an OP therapist.

Yes you cannot become a house mouse, you must get out and do your normal activities
and routine.

[Not Heidi]

5. Ok...

Second paragraph: good advice. Thank you.

First para: I have a therapist. Due to insurance restrictions, I was not allowed to see her while in the program - known as "double dipping." We resume our regular schedule this Saturday. So - not to worry.

Thanks, Irish Dem.

[Irish_Dem]

9. Yes this is proper clinical protocol.

You work with your clinical PH team while there.
You work with your OP therapist when out of PH.

Yes you cannot see your OP while in PH. Too many cooks spoil the broth.

It is important to keep your OP appointment on Saturday and tell the therapist how you are feeling.

[Not Heidi]

12. I'll keep the appointment -

No worries.

[Irish_Dem]

13. Excellent.

You spent some time in PH and transitioning back to home is a big adjustment.
This is to be expected.

Stick to the home routine as set up by your treatment team.
Your OP therapist will help with the transition issues.

If there is a crisis hotline in your area you can call them if needed.

[scipan]

10. I know what depression and anxiety are like

My advice is to do some little tiny thing, like make coffee or whatever. It often gets you a little dopamine rush and gets you off your ass.

Oh, and don't be too critical of yourself. You wouldn't do that to a good friend who asks you for advice, so why do it to yourself?

[XanaDUer2]

15. Hug

[Not Heidi]

16. Thank you, XD2

back atcha

[limbicnuminousity]

18. Routine and sunlight.

It may take some time for you to settle into a new routine even after a partial stay. Be patient but firm with yourself establishing a functional routine that's conducive to self-care. And take walks if you can! Even 30 minutes of sunlight can do wonders for your general sense of well-being.