I feel a slow rumbling dis-ease.

[FreedRadical]

As the Oscar buzz grows around the movie
12 Years A Slave, I feel a growing dis-quiet.
Last year was not one of my best years where race was concerned. I like to think I have some skill in conducting myself as a proud intelligent, respectful, thoughtful, inclusive, and compassionate Black Man. Last year, not so much.

Now I see another round of well meaning unskilled white people, many whom I love, wanting to talk of how this movie affected them, and how they understand me better. My stomach is already clinched. I was in grade school when Roots came out. As you may guess there were many fights, and lots of shame and shaming then. This is the source of my dis-ease.

All my life I have work hard to distance myself from negative Black and Black Male stereotypes. Time and time again having them heaved back on to me. What's more, I was branded an uncle tom for my trouble. It seemed like no matter what I did it was inescapable.

Then I had nowhere to turn. Now I turn to you. I am not ashamed of our collective past. I just want to be more skilled and kind going forward. Not really feeling it right now. Though I have not seen the movie, and may not. I want to be appropriate in my response. I do not want to be cruel to the well meaning. I wish to draw from the pride and strength that is Black People. I wish to draw from you.

I am wondering, does this make sense?
Do you feel me?

[JustAnotherGen]

1. I need to come back to this later

[Number23]

2. In a way, I do feel you

But in a way, I don't. That's probably just because of the differences in our experiences.

I grew up in an all black environment. That means fellow students, teachers, principals, hell even my doctors and mayors were black. So "Roots" didn't lead to any knuckle-y discussions when I was a kid but I understand that for a lot of black kids in predominantly white environments, getting called Kunta Kente was the lead up to some white kid getting an IMMEDIATE beat down. That's really kind of sad.

I haven't seen 12 Years a Slave and I probably won't. I don't do well at all with depictions of slavery. I read the Autobiography of Frederick Douglass when I was in high school and that fucked with my head for about two solid months. But I hear what you are saying and we'd all better brace for "well meaning" white people that know so very little about the black contribution to this country (I blame American schools for this more than the average white person) and that suddenly want to "talk" because of this movie without understanding that for alot of us, the last things we want to do is express our angst about racism/slavery/discrimination with whites because they won't understand and in the worst cases, they become defensive and completely unsympathetic. It's simply not worth the headache.

On a much lesser but similar note, when Chris Rock made that loathsome "Good Hair" movie, I felt the same sense of dread that you're feeling now. And sure enough, I don't know how many "well meaning" white people have wanted to talk to me about that movie and what it means only to be surprised when I quickly note that I have not seen the movie, WILL not see the movie and have no interest in discussing it. I just shut it down.

[FreedRadical]

3. We are 12% of our city's population.

And we have just been through a massive gentrification in my home neighborhood, displacing about 70% of us. Now we are treated like outsiders in our own neighborhood.

[1StrongBlackMan]

4. Yeah this ...

we'd all better brace for "well meaning" white people that know so very little about the black contribution to this country (I blame American schools for this more than the average white person) and that suddenly want to "talk" because of this movie without understanding that for alot of us, the last things we want to do is express our angst about racism/slavery/discrimination with whites because they won't understand and in the worst cases, they become defensive and completely unsympathetic. It's simply not worth the headache.

(I have nothing ... zero ... not a word, to add.)

[JustAnotherGen]

5. +1 - but one word

I suspect it will be used to tell people who lived through Jim Crow that "they didn't have it so bad after all".

At least around here it will be used that way . . . not in THIS group - but around DU.

[kwassa]

6. Speaking as a white guy ...

I think you have no responsibility to educate your white friends or even respond on this subject. Do what you need to do with yourself. I have seen other black bloggers talking about the same thing you are talking about now; how to deal with well-meaning white friends in relation to this film.

I educated myself, mostly. I would like to see "12 Years" eventually, but I don't expect it to tell me something that I don't already know about. I've always been interested in history and culture, though. My wife and daughter are black, but I knew a lot about black culture and history before we ever met.

Now to advocate for the other side of this argument: I did learn a lot more online by just listening, but it tracks back to the earliest days of Internet discussion boards in the early 90s. The old Usenet. soc.culture.african.amercan, and other groups. There were some great writers and great discussions, which was somehow easier online. I come here to hear more of the same.

It is your choice to do what is right for you.

[JustAnotherGen]

7. Kick

Because it deserves it

[FreedRadical]

9. Once more I am humbled.

[steve2470]

8. I saw the movie

I thought it was a semi-accurate depiction of slavery (from what I know), but then again I'm a white guy. As always, I'm open to being educated to the truth.

Steve