Always highlight: 10 newest replies | Replies posted after I mark a forum
Replies to this discussion thread
 1 replies |
Author | Time | Post |
 And again... (Original post) |
Harker | Nov 2020 | OP |
| CaliforniaPeggy | Nov 2020 | #1 |
Response to Harker (Original post)
Thu Nov 19, 2020, 02:21 PM
CaliforniaPeggy (147,015 posts)
1. This is good!
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I took the liberty of rearranging it a bit. See what you think. My thoughts are below.
hawk shadow suddenly blue jays go silent I rearranged it so it would flow more easily. And I like the ambiguity of putting suddenly in the middle. Your poem is full of vivid images and is strong! 
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