Yorkshire residents terrified they could be made Leeds United owner

[T_i_B]

http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/sport/sport-headlines/yorkshire-residents-terrified-they-could-be-made-leeds-united-owner-2014120493502

THE cobbled streets of Yorkshire are empty as residents cower in their homes, terrified they could be made the new owner of Leeds United.

Scouts are hunting for a fall guy to take control of the club while current owner Massimo Cellino, found guilty of being Italian, steps down until next March.

54-year-old Bill McKay said: “You can’t have a pint without fear of being press-ganged and waking up with that white rose in your buttonhole, marked for life.

“Just look at the previous incumbents: Peter Ridsdale and Ken Bates, neither of whom will ever be served in a Betty’s Tea Rooms ever again. Homing pigeons go ten miles out of their way to shit on their heads.”

[Aquavit]

1. Luxury!

They're lucky to have a home! When I was young, all 26 of us lived in a corridor!

[T_i_B]

2. Steve Evans: Leeds appoint new boss as Massimo Cellino banned

The Daily Mash article is getting a lot of airing again owing to owner Massimo Cellino being banned from running the club (again!) and the appointment of ex Rotherham United boss Steve Evans as manager.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/34570202

Steve Evans is on record as saying the following about Leeds United in 2013. He does not appear to be a popular appointment.

"Leeds are not a big club, they used to be, now they are just a circus run by puppets, watched by blinkered seals. I would turn it down, I want to be the captain of a cruise liner not the titanic"

It's enough to make you feel sorry for their fans.