Welcome to DU! The truly grassroots left-of-center political community where regular people, not algorithms, drive the discussions and set the standards. Join the community: Create a free account Support DU (and get rid of ads!): Become a Star Member Latest Breaking News General Discussion The DU Lounge All Forums Issue Forums Culture Forums Alliance Forums Region Forums Support Forums Help & Search

murielm99

(30,730 posts)
Wed Mar 30, 2016, 06:08 AM Mar 2016

One year.

It has been one year since my son-in-law died. I don't think things have gotten easier.

My daughter has taken a new job, in the upper Midwest. She is closer to home, and, I think, happier there. It is better, not perfect.

She had him in her life for such a short time. I am glad they had each other at all. She hurts more than the rest of us, but we all hurt over his loss.

I don't know what she will be doing today. I will call her. It could be that she does not want to talk. That would be all right.

I don't have much that is hopeful or cheerful to say today. I do hope some of you are feeling better. I mean that. I don't want to drag anyone down.

4 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
One year. (Original Post) murielm99 Mar 2016 OP
Anniversary dates are just awful. DeadLetterOffice Mar 2016 #1
The first anniversary is the hardest. No Vested Interest Mar 2016 #2
Dear Muriel, I don't think it EVER gets easier. Ever. It does get different though. auntAgonist Apr 2016 #3
kesha--you have been absolutely *wonderful* for this group & to this group orleans Apr 2016 #4

DeadLetterOffice

(1,352 posts)
1. Anniversary dates are just awful.
Wed Mar 30, 2016, 06:41 AM
Mar 2016

Mostly, it's all about hunkering down and surviving the day.

I'm so sorry for your loss, and your continuing grief. Be gentle with yourself today.

Hugs,
DLO

No Vested Interest

(5,165 posts)
2. The first anniversary is the hardest.
Wed Mar 30, 2016, 03:07 PM
Mar 2016

Beyond the first anniversary, one can say to oneself -"Well, I got through (that day- birthday, holiday, anniversary-) once and will do so again on subsequent reminder days."

There is no right or wrong way for each person mark these days. The heart knows best.

auntAgonist

(17,252 posts)
3. Dear Muriel, I don't think it EVER gets easier. Ever. It does get different though.
Wed Apr 6, 2016, 10:21 AM
Apr 2016

Last edited Fri Apr 8, 2016, 09:20 AM - Edit history (1)

I'm sorry I missed you post by a few day. Having a few hard days (months) here and admittedly I've fallen in my committment to this wonderful group of friends.

I hope you were able to speak to your daughter and I hope the day was more good than bad for her. Anniversaries are tough, no matter how many years it's been.

Please know Muriel that ANYTHING you post here is important and I'm sure won't bring any of us down. We are a support group after all.

IF you ever feel like sending a private message I'm always, always open to that too.

I'm hoping you have a good day today and much better days ahead.

kesha.

orleans

(34,044 posts)
4. kesha--you have been absolutely *wonderful* for this group & to this group
Fri Apr 8, 2016, 12:30 AM
Apr 2016

please don't ever think otherwise

we are all so lucky to have you here, your tender/kind/thoughtful words, your insight, and your love.

i am hoping you (and all of us) have much better days ahead.

we love you. always know that.

Latest Discussions»Support Forums»Bereavement»One year.