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ProudMNDemocrat

(16,669 posts)
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 08:44 AM Nov 2023

Lost my only Brother on 21 November, 2023

Last edited Wed Nov 22, 2023, 10:24 AM - Edit history (2)

After suffering a massive heart attack, loss of blood to the brain on Sunday night, my 50 year old brother(the only boy after 3 sisters) died in a Sacramento, California hospital. My only remaining sister was with him as he took his last breaths. His name was John Anthony Horvat.

Prior to that, I was involved in a conference call with the Doctor, my sister, and my daughter that the only option was to gently let him go because the prognosis of ever recovering was not going to happen. But the story of a troubled man began in 2000 when our father died. It was not a good death and it hit him hard, as he was to take care of our mother. In 2013, our mother died in a Reno, Hospital. Again, not a good death. Once again, a hard hit reality and a journey to the depths of mental and physical damage that would take its toll through alcoholism and addiction to pain killers. (Another long story).

Now my Brother, John, is in a place where there is no more pain and worry. He is joined with our parents and sister, Deborah. My relationship with him was strained for the past 2 years when I last spoke to him, letting him know that I unable to loan him a large amount of money. All throughout those 2 years, I prayed for him, for good health mentally and physically.

I will miss my Brother. In February, I plan to go out to California for a celebration of his life with my Sister, my daughter, Family, and friends when it would be his Birthday. Perhaps take his ashes to the Reno-Sparks area to spread in the canyons near the place he lived with my late mother where the wild Mustangs would graze down by the Truckee River at that time of the year. He loved the horses.

Goodbye, John. I will see him again and we will have much to catch up on.

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Lost my only Brother on 21 November, 2023 (Original Post) ProudMNDemocrat Nov 2023 OP
My sympathy to you and the family on the loss livetohike Nov 2023 #1
I am very sorry Easterncedar Nov 2023 #2
Im so sorry for your loss. onecaliberal Nov 2023 #3
... 2naSalit Nov 2023 #4
Sorry to have that happen to you. Wish the best for you and your family marked50 Nov 2023 #5
I'm an only child and always wished for a sibling. tavernier Nov 2023 #6
I'm so sorry. Scrivener7 Nov 2023 #7
My brother died this year, too PJMcK Nov 2023 #8
My condolences on your loss as well. ProudMNDemocrat Nov 2023 #22
I am so sorry for your loss and for the difficulties and stresses Tanuki Nov 2023 #9
I am sorry. murielm99 Nov 2023 #10
I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel ms liberty Nov 2023 #11
Oh goodness Ms Liberty, I'm sorry you are grieving AllyCat Nov 2023 #15
Thank you. n/t ms liberty Nov 2023 #24
Hugs to you, Ms.Liberty ProudMNDemocrat Nov 2023 #23
Very true. Thank you. n/t ms liberty Nov 2023 #25
Holding you in my heart for consolation. Every life is a blessing. n/t TygrBright Nov 2023 #12
I am so sorry for your loss. LoisB Nov 2023 #13
I'm so sorry for your loss. AllyCat Nov 2023 #14
Sorry for your loss. Take care y paz. RestoreAmerica2020 Nov 2023 #16
Holding you in my heart. Goddessartist Nov 2023 #17
Beautiful testimonial to a beloved sibling cilla4progress Nov 2023 #18
I am so sorry for your loss. 💙 sheshe2 Nov 2023 #19
Hail The Traveler! Deep State Witch Nov 2023 #20
Condolences Lilaclady Nov 2023 #21
So sorry to read this. OAITW r.2.0 Nov 2023 #26
I am so sorry for your loss. BoomaofBandM Nov 2023 #27
Hugs to you as well. ProudMNDemocrat Nov 2023 #29
Sorry to hear IbogaProject Nov 2023 #28
I am so sorry AmBlue Nov 2023 #30

livetohike

(22,115 posts)
1. My sympathy to you and the family on the loss
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 08:53 AM
Nov 2023

of your brother . May your good memories and the stories you’ll tell help ease the sadness. Rest in peace John .

tavernier

(12,358 posts)
6. I'm an only child and always wished for a sibling.
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 10:14 AM
Nov 2023

I know you have thousands of lovely memories.
Treasure them.

So sorry for your loss.

PJMcK

(21,984 posts)
8. My brother died this year, too
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 10:29 AM
Nov 2023

He had a decades-long problem with alcohol and it eventually destroyed his organs. He was only 58. I miss him every day.

I’m sorry for your loss. Their passings leave holes in our lives.

Have a peaceful Thanksgiving.

ProudMNDemocrat

(16,669 posts)
22. My condolences on your loss as well.
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 12:14 PM
Nov 2023

When I saw my brother for the 1st time, it was at the time of my Grandmother's death in February of 1974 in Cleveland. John was 1 year old. When I looked at his tiny face, I saw mine. He looked so much like me at that age. My 46 year old son looks a lot like him on the Horvat side in build, etc. But my son is far healthier.

Cherish your memories as well. It is always a bummer when death occurs around Holidays. My last remaining Grandparent died on Thanksgiving Day Nov.28, 1991, 40 minutes before the Macy's Parade was to start. He did not get to see my daughter, who partook in the Parade that year.

Tanuki

(14,909 posts)
9. I am so sorry for your loss and for the difficulties and stresses
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 10:36 AM
Nov 2023

John went through. Your plans to honor his memory sound lovely. Hold fast to your best memories of him

Philippians 4:8 King James Version (KJV) Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

ms liberty

(8,537 posts)
11. I'm so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 10:51 AM
Nov 2023

I lost my only sibling, my sister, last Tuesday in a car accident. She was 72, not in great health, and we had spoken only a few times in the last couple of years. We had a difficult relationship; she was 8 years older and had a controlling personality. I always said we got along wonderfully when we rarely saw each other. There's other family drama involved, and for my own sanity and peace I'm staying away from it, but I'm feeling quite a bit of angst and grief right now over my sister's death and the current family situation.

ProudMNDemocrat

(16,669 posts)
23. Hugs to you, Ms.Liberty
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 12:18 PM
Nov 2023

May your sister be at peace that despite the circumstances, you loved her.

I left a Good bye John voice message on my sister's phone so she could play it back to my Brother before he died. Jesus will also let him know what I said. Our memories of the good times give us strength.

BoomaofBandM

(1,769 posts)
27. I am so sorry for your loss.
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 01:14 PM
Nov 2023

My sister passed away in may. I have a brother who is struggling with alcoholism and having health problems because of it. I love my family, but it gets complicated. Take care of yourself, I hope you and your family find some peace.

ProudMNDemocrat

(16,669 posts)
29. Hugs to you as well.
Wed Nov 22, 2023, 01:22 PM
Nov 2023

Death happens every day. Harder when it occurs around Holidays.

My last remaining Grandfather died 40 minutes before the Macy's Parade was to start, Thanksgiving Day 1991. That was Nov.28th. My daughter was partaking in the Parade as part of a Cheerleader contingent of NCA All Stars from all over the country at the High School level.

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