Ben Carson Promises to Marry Horse if Gay Marriage Legalized

[EEO]

Ben Carson Promises to Marry Horse if Gay Marriage Legalized
Source: The Nil Admirari

::SNIP::

"In the past I have compared gay marriage to morally reprehensible things like bestiality and pedophilia. So today I say if the Supreme Court makes it okay for any two consenting adults to marry each other then I can marry a horse," stated Carson.

::SNIP::

An unidentified member of the press asked Carson what his intentions were with the horse.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. His intentions?

My guess is that would depend on whether he married a mare or a stallion!

[daleanime]

3. Well, if he's protesting gay marriage....

it would have to be the stallion, right?

[CTyankee]

7. Peggy, good for you! Now THAT was funny! Got my belly laugh of the day!!!

[Xyzse]

2. I was drinking water as I was reading that post...

Thank you, for the good five minutes trying to compose myself after splashing my monitor.

[immoderate]

4. Poe's Law strikes again!

I sent some Carson statements to a Libertarian friend earlier to show how 'wacko' he is, and I was wonderig how I missed this one.

--imm

[Old Codger]

5. He is

Hoping to be able to make it public so he can quit hiding his romances

[Journeyman]

6. Sounds like Carson has far more problems than his issues with gay marriage. . .

Wonder if the horse will consent, or if he'll just ride her.

(But then, maybe he's just looking to find himself something hung exactly like a horse.)

[liam_laddie]

18. So THAT'S where the term "mounting a horse" comes from...n/t

[longship]

8. "And the damned sheep is a liar!"

[LiberalFighter]

9. How does he get the horse to consent?

Will he dress the horse and kiss it?

Ben Carson really does live a a different world.

[JoePhilly]

19. The horse will say .... "Naaaayyyyyyy" during the wedding vows.

[rurallib]

10. what size ring and diamond look good on a hoof?

[unionthug777]

21. a minimum of 2 carrots.

[Fuddnik]

11. I think that's legal in Georgia.

Just kidding.

I was gonna say West Virginia, but I think any deep red state will do.

[whistler162]

24. Only if they are cousins.

[davidpdx]

12. So Ben, you oppose gay marriage, but are for bestiality?

[world wide wally]

13. Will we get to see pictures of the honeymoon?

[angrychair]

14. what.a.tool.

I HATE these illogical debates. What. The. Fuck. Does marrying an animal have to do with PEOPLE getting married? Animals cannot consent. Children cannot consent. There is a difference between them and what CONSENTING adults do. To think anything else makes you a horse-raping douche nozzle.

[workinclasszero]

15. Poor horse

Just shows the mentality of these right wing freaks.

[AnnieBW]

16. Mr. Ed, the Next Generation

Hello... Willllburrrrr...

[jmowreader]

17. Nil Admirari is one of the better Onion clones out there

[madinmaryland]

20. Man-on-horse Carson. I guess that beats Santorum!

[lame54]

22. What horse would have him?

[whistler162]

23. Probably just the front part

since he has the back part covered!

[kiranon]

25. Thought he had a problem, didn't know it was with horses.

[NoJusticeNoPeace]

26. Carson has deep deep hatred of gay people. They do NOT love the sinner (no such thing as sin)

[physioex]

27. Hope the Horse is a Gelding......

Wouldn't want the two reproducing.......