Thinking about rape, misogyny, domestic violence...

[LiberalLoner]

Ive noticed, the more miserable the family (alcoholism or drug abuse, poverty, etc.) the more cruelty, lack of empathy and violence and dysfunction there is.

Our society is under lots of pressure from the 1% screwing us, continual war, etc. and we are seeing it result in more hatred of women, minorities, the poor, the sick. We are seeing more drug abuse, violence, suicide, etc. Less and less empathy.

I don't like where this is going. I don't like that Liberal and Conservatives both seem to agree hatred of women is a great way to release the pent up anger and pressure. Ladies, we are the punching bag for all of society now. Can't be angry at the rich and powerful - too dangerous - easier to pick on a more convenient target, one with less strength...

[CrispyQ]

1. The backlash against women - is it getting worse?

Or do we just see & hear of it more, due to increased media access? Our cultures value the qualities of aggression, domination, & violence in men & conformity, submission & fear in women. I like to think that this is the patriarchy's last violent effort to stay in power, but some days I think the misogyny is getting much worse.

I hope more & more people see that we must kill the patriarchy if we are ever to evolve socially as a species.

[seabeyond]

7. i have thought of that. without the nets, i think it was more pocket. but with the net, there are

more people visibly saying this shit validate another opinion. i think it creates a ripple into a wave.

[LiberalLoner]

12. Yes. I think it is similar to how racism has become more mainstream than ever, more open. I

see people who say this stuff openly, racist stuff, with no shame whatsoever. It didn't used to be that way, at least not around the people I saw growing up.

[Whisp]

2. +++

I don't think that Quest for Fire part of humans has gone too far into remission. That deep part in the brain where how to solve problems and frustrations is to take it out aggressively against anything that is closest to you is alive and very unwell, in relation to economy, etc, as you stated.

Sour Times.

[nomorenomore08]

21. Arthur Koestler's concept of the "ghost in the machine" - IIRC - was something like that.

The idea that due to evolution, more primitive brain structures - reptile, mammal, lower primate - still exist within the more advanced human brain.

Although Koestler, from what I've read about the guy, seems to have been quite the misogynist. So maybe he also recognized - but couldn't fully deal with - that more primitive aspect within himself.

[Whisp]

3. I hope you don't mind me putting this song here:

Portishead - Wandering Star.

It's sort of depressing, but somehow I feel better when I hear this and maybe others do as well. Sad songs make me feel better when I'm sad. I know that's not for everyone tho and I will take this down if you request.

Please could you stay awhile to share my grief
For its such a lovely day
To have to always feel this way
And the time that I will suffer less
Is when I never have to wake

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever
Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever

... Those who have seen the needles eye, now tread
Like a husk, from which all that was, now has fled
And the masks, that the monsters wear
To feed, upon their prey

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever
Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever

(always) doubled up inside
Take awhile to shed my grief
(always) doubled up inside
Taunted, cruel.... ...

Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever
Wandering stars, for whom it is reserved
The blackness of darkness forever

[LiberalLoner]

4. Thank you so much for this song....

I love this group!

[seabeyond]

11. thank you. love the song. love the singer. nt

[nomorenomore08]

22. Portishead is never a bad idea...

[LiberalLoner]

5. My eyes were opened to just how many men like kiddy porn...

Political ads in Virginia talking about how many tens of thousands of computers identified with child porn on them. Too many to prosecute really.

Friend coming back from Afghanistan saying his biggest duty, most time used up, was removing kiddy porn from the computers of our military.

I read a few years ago, kiddy porn is the fastest growing sector of porn on Internet.

So, so many things like this. I see what are coy little apologies for child rape even on DU and I know what it is when I see it. Even if there is plausible deniability.

And it occurs to me, they are trying to shut us up mainly because we are threatening their fun. We are trying to take their preferred type of sex away from them.

1 in 3 females sexually abused before 18. It's not just a few men doing all that raping. It is pandemic. Even here on DU.

[seabeyond]

9. yes. the thing about it is, people say consenting... so all is ok. a person wants it, and that

validates it.

that cannot be our line in society. or we get this.

[CrispyQ]

16. I had no idea it was so rampant.

I realize there have been pervs among us since the beginning of our species, but am I the only one who thinks that it's beyond the scale of anything it's been before? Where are these perverse desires coming from? I think they're being cultivated by a culture that sexes up girls at a young age. Why did we think that once we accepted objectifying & pornifying women, that Madison Avenue & everyone else would limit to age 18 or older?

More & more, our culture accepts heinous behavior from men, particularly in regards to women.

This is somewhat related to my comment above. Remember this article & our discussion about it on the Feminist group?

Wiring Sexual Tastes to Hairless Genitals...Oops!

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/cupids-poisoned-arrow/201201/wiring-sexual-tastes-hairless-genitalsoops

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1139432 - The Feminist group discussion. I posted the article again in a thread on GD & out of the 3-4 responses, only one person thought the article had any validity. The others had a variety of excuses for why there was no validity to the idea.

[LiberalLoner]

17. Yes, I think you are 100% correct!

I tried to participate once in a discussion about how violent porn has become against women. I was ridiculed for "knowing my porn" and also accused of making wild stuff up. Just attacked. You know how it goes. I wouldn't be surprised if we didn't get attacked for exploring this topic like we are doing now....glad we are safe in this group where attacks are shut down.

I truly believe we are going to see kiddy porn legalized very soon, within the next ten years. The demand for it is just overwhelming.

Had a male counselor once confess to me he usually had to masturbate during the day after listening to survivor's stories. I left his office and never came back. Yeah, it' sncredibly widespread among men.

[One_Life_To_Give]

18. Passed from Generation to Generation

Don't think Madison Ave. is doing anything to help. But I think we still have a hidden epidemic of child abuse. I was reading just this weekend about a woman recounting her youth as a victim of Incest/Pornography. And in the comments there was a purported older woman implying she should be grateful for the experience.

When I last checked stats in the developing world. Family members within the victims home was the leading stat. Adding a camera to make a few bucks isn't much of a step. Be it a child, kidnap victim or slave, the common point is someone who can't fight back. And if some of the kids grow up to become predators/enablers?

[Helen Reddy]

19. With great care Liberal Loner.

The truth will get you nowhere in many parts of DU.

[LiberalLoner]

20. Very very true, I have scars from the DU battles...

[seabeyond]

6. yes. little groups that feel the can go around and call women names with impunity.

seeing the visceral hatred with womens issue on a progressive board is interesting.

[LiberalLoner]

8. To say the least. Disheartening is a word I'd use to describe it.

I've fought all my life for justice, for less harm, for a better world.

Still waiting to hear if I have NMO (fatal disease) or "just" MS.

Thinking, I might be dying now....and all my struggles to try to make a better world were nothing but a fart in a hurricane. How useless my life has been.

[seabeyond]

10. for protective measures, i tend to turn things into a sociological question with issues

like this. then i can look at it from afar, instead of personally.

as to your health. keep us updated please. i have been reading your posts, and i am glad you are able to discuss and connect. i think that is important. love you, woman.

[LiberalLoner]

13. Thank you. But it's hard not to take it personally when f rom a very young age I basically

made it my mission in life.

I'm an INFP, that's what we do. Go on crusades. And the crusade I joined from the youngest age has failed.

PS thank you, I will keep you guys updated. I hope to hear within another couple of weeks. NMO test takes 3 weeks, they had to send it out to some other lab, so another week or so for travel time...then my doctor has to call and make an appointment for me to learn the results, and her schedule is very busy, lots of wounded warriors to take care of...might be awhile. So I am living iwth the uncertainty.

[CrispyQ]

14. "...a fart in a hurricane."

You can't look at it that way, you just can't. You never know whose life you may have impacted by something you said or did. Sometimes your words & actions don't sink in until later. I advocate vegetarianism, because I think it's healthier for the body, the spirit, the animals & the planet. Years ago, I made a few comments in front of a group of people to that effect. I'm not a militant veggie. I just spoke from the heart. About three years later a woman approached me in the health food store. She said, "You may not remember me, but I was at an event where you spoke about vegetarianism. Your words had such an impact on me. It didn't happen right away, & I had several false starts, but I've been vegan for over a year now & I've never felt better." Wow! Was that a joyful moment!

You do what you do because it's the right thing to do.

Will be anxiously awaiting your diagnosis.

[LiberalLoner]

15. Thank you!

I needed the encouragement. The woman-hate has been overwhelming the past few years, with the war on women, with even progressive men on a progressive board joining in....it feels like we have lost. Worldwide.

It feels like men are angry about the overpopulated, competitive world, and they blame us women for that....and boy are they gonna make us pay and pay and pay and pay...

[nomorenomore08]

23. I've also had that "doomed" sort of feeling for a while. More generalized, but comparable.

I'm still a young man - late 20's - but a few friends (and not simply acquaintances) of mine have begun reproducing, which makes me feel like I have to hold my tongue about the pessimism, bordering on despair, which has preoccupied me these last few years. But if there truly is no hope then what good does it to do to lie to people?