This message was self-deleted by its author

[Little Star]

This message was self-deleted by its author (Little Star) on Sat Jun 23, 2012, 01:57 PM. When the original post in a discussion thread is self-deleted, the entire discussion thread is automatically locked so new replies cannot be posted.

[mzteris]

1. not me....

wouldn't think they would anyway. Wouldn't go if they did.

NOT happy with the way things were done. I'm not a man-hating, sex-hating woman, lgbt-hating woman either - like it seems they want to paint us. Not sure how THAT BS got started.

No, we didn't fire any shots over the bow, we just refused to lay down and take it.

[DURHAM D]

2. I don't think she in any way wanted you to make a choice.

I believe she just wants you to know you will be welcomed. To me the groups serve very different functions and its all good.

I just hope we can all make a new start. God knows we have work to do on DU and in the real world and that includes getting Obama re-elected.

[Little Star]

12. Well lets just see if everyone in HoF got a invite before...

there is really any actual new starts? I hope you are right though and that it is a real make nice not a conquer and divide.

Did any HoF members not get invited?

If we were all welcomed then that would say a lot, a lot of good. I hope we were all extended the same welcome.

[PassingFair]

48. Oh really? What function do the other groups serve?

Hardly any posts in either one of them.

That's the issue. No one wants to enter their echo chambers.

[Scout]

52. that's why i think some were so hot to combine groups...

geez, i don't think iverglas had even been PPR'd a whole day before there was "do you want to combine the groups, now that the reason they are separate is GONE?" or similar statements, that's not an exact quote.

[Tumbulu]

3. Not me

I have noticed that the "Nun's on the Bus" are one answer to the last question that I posed to that group.

So glad that you all got this group going. Thanks again!

[laconicsax]

4. I was as well.

I thought it was a very polite invitation to participate in the other group and I didn't it as suggesting that I leave HoF.

[Little Star]

16. I actually just meant that HoF is my feminist home...

but visiting there on a friendly basis for me, depends on how they host and run the group.

[Violet_Crumble]

5. Yes, and I really hope everyone can put the past behind them...

Yardwork's a really good and genuine person who I trust. I don't think it's a matter of choosing one group over the other. If all feminists are welcome in the Feminists group, I see myself posting both here and there for a while, and if things go well, then hopefully we'll all post in the Feminists group*. The only reason I left that group initially was because of the concerns I had with the hosting issues and how it was handled, so that concern no longer exists for me...

* btw, that'd be a long way down the track if it happened...

[Little Star]

14. Please see my post #12

[hlthe2b]

18. yes...

certainly.

[Scout]

6. i was.

i might post there.

probably not though, i just went there for a minute and "Isn't Neoma wonderful, isn't Neoma marvelous."

[Control-Z]

31. +1000 n/t

[sufrommich]

56. I would love to see the jury for Little Star's hidden post.

I'm sure it had something to do with someone feeling personally insulted. Considering the mega thread in Meta,the irony is strong with this one.

[Scout]

57. ask and ye shall receive

http://www.democraticunderground.com/?com=view_post&forum=1255&pid=5579
Author: Little Star
Subject = I'm just re-reading this thread this morning...

Alerter comments: Is there any reason to attack in this manner? I would say this goes under hurtful, rude and insensitive.

Juror #1 voted to HIDE IT and said: No explanation given
Juror #2 voted to HIDE IT and said: Is anyone else tired of divisive and derisive posts?
Juror #3 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: This doesn't look any worse than the one it replied to and the other response to it. It just looks like a personal argument, maybe better left for a PM but not in violation.
Juror #4 voted to HIDE IT and said: No explanation given
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE and said: The tone was certainly sarcastic, but I don't feel that it was abusive.
Juror #6 voted to HIDE IT and said: No explanation given
==================================================

i was not the alerter nor on the jury ... this was posted in MIRT.

[seabeyond]

58. mirt? to tos? why would anyone hit tos with our sweet little star? nt

[hlthe2b]

7. A truce would be a welcome development with the opportunity for both groups to find common ground

to work together. That said, healing takes time and I do not discount that as an issue.

I do see our group as distinctly different in its focus and scope.

Nonetheless, I think and hope this marks the start of a more positive interaction between the group... perhaps even some possible collaboration in the future to address some mutal issues.

[Little Star]

15. Please see my post #12

[kdmorris]

30. I hope so, too.

Yes, healing does take time.

But, divided we fall, you know?

[southernyankeebelle]

8. If they kicked you out for saying something you didn't agree with what makes them think

you are going to change your mind if you disagree again with them? Just saying. Know one can make up your mind but you. I'd think twice.

[Scout]

9. i don't feel a need to rejoin, nor to change either group

what i need is for the multitude of fucking creeps, jerks and assholes that make up what i call the swarm to stay the hell out of here and just leave us the fuck alone.

like that will ever happen

to be sure, this is NOT a criticism at all of our hosts! they are doing a fine job, thank you very much.

[hlthe2b]

11. It is merely one person making a positive overture...

I don't think, given the continued unpleasantness in meta, that we can make more of it than that. But, neither do I want to tie yardwork's hands, if she is attempting to halt some of the unpleasantness targeted towards us. It is a start. And, heaven knows, I think all of us are tired of the constant strife.

But, I do understand, Scout... truly

[boston bean]

13. I was not.

I do wish for the attacks to stop. If this helps. Good.

[MadrasT]

17. Yes, well.

I do appreciate yardwork's effort and intention.

Too many people who are hostile to us elsewhere on DU post there, which makes it unappealing to me.

The ex-host worship is also a problem for me.

[Little Star]

19. I have to say I'm not impressed by the welcome environment over there tonight...

WTH?

[laconicsax]

20. Some people absolutely can't let things go.

Hell, a post of redqueen's that died a month ago in Meta was just kicked and some are taking the opportunity to point to things innocuous things said 8 years ago and say "see! see!"

[Texasgal]

22. I noticed that today.

I also noticed the 200+ reply thread calling out seabyond. That makes me really sad. I wonder how long that will go on or if they are done with the nasty belittling? This is one of the reasons I cannot just blindly jump on this group invite. So much has been said... hurtful.

[Scout]

50. "things said 8 years ago"

yes, SOMEONE on MIRT who shall remain nameless was inquiring how to get back to DU2 ... presumably for mining of 10 year old quotes to hold against someone else, while trying to get them PPR'd.

Why else?

[hlthe2b]

23. Sadly, the good intentions expressed by yardwork has not gone over very well with many there...

I wish them well with their leadership transition and elections....

[Little Star]

37. Please read my post #36 to Violet....

Tell me where I am wrong if I am.

I just keep getting more angry every minute about how the whole thing went down. Hindsight and all that.

[MadrasT]

24. Seems like yardwork's olive branch...

...is only a personally extended twig.

And they really gotta stop using "vile transphobia" when it doesn't actually apply.

[Scout]

51. that's all they've got, is made up shit.

and trying to smear by association.

[kdmorris]

29. I think most of us do welcome anyone from here to post

libodem does not speak for all of us and it's pretty likely that he/she posted that with the intention of widening the rift. Don't play into his/her hands.

Please do not let one asshole with an axe to grind (against yardwork of all people) screw it up for all of us.

[Violet_Crumble]

34. Likewise when it comes to this group...

I've started to get a really clear idea after today of who's intent on widening, not healing, any rifts...

I totally agree with what you've said both here and in the Feminists group, except if you've posted in the meantime and said i'm a boring waste of space whoi is more painful to deal with than the Ebola virus, and then yr on my shit-list!

[kdmorris]

38. ROFL!

I can assure you I have not said that. You can check... there's not even any self-deletes.

[Texasgal]

21. I was invited.

I don't think she is asking anyone of us to forgo HoF membership.

I welcome any healing overtures, I think we should embrace that type of thing... it's better than having crap thrown at us in Meta. If we try to get along the drama freaks won't have anything to party with. Just a thought..

She also asked me if I would vote for a new host, I thought that was very nice. However, I will not take part in a vote because out of fairness I haven't participated in that group since the coup. I will watch this vote and watch the behaviors. I will then decide if I want to be a part of it. I will not jump blindly.

You are still stuck with me.

I appreciate Yardwork's extension of an Olive Branch though. It was a good gesture.

[MadrasT]

25. Fuck that nonsense.

Seriously.

I love yardwork , but that group is a disaster.

[Little Star]

26. At this point, you speak for me on this!

[Texasgal]

27. I have to agree.

Nice of yardwork... if she is reading thank you anyway.

[CrispyQ]

46. I figured if anyone was going to call it the way it is,

it would be you or redqueen.

I was barely on the peripheral of the whole thing, so I know very little of what transpired, but I do remember that it started with one member taking control & behaving badly. Then other DUers, who were not members of the group, hopped on the bandwagon & this seemed to empower her.

I think that many DUers, who were not part of the group, took the opportunity to paint a sub-set of the group (mostly members of this HOF group, not surprisingly!) as being anti-men, anti-sex, anti-LGBT & basically too radical to even reason with. Because we are concerned with the objectification & pornification of women & even more, the pornification of our entire culture, we are radical.

That was my take, from my very limited exposure to the thousands of posts during that time.

I am happy to be here, where people are aware of the very harmful effect porn is having on our culture & our species' development - if you could even call it that. Some days I wonder.

[PassingFair]

49. I just looked at the post. They should reform and call themselves "Feminist/Meta"

Meta will become a ghost town if they pull this off.

I am fully supportive!

[sufrommich]

28. Yikes, I just went over there and looked.

I give props to Yardwork for giving it a try, but no thanks, maybe someday. The oddest thing about the feminist forum is that it moves at a snails pace,their front page goes back to May 5th. A lot of these posters in that thread seem a lot more invested in settling scores and vilifying HOF than they do in actually using the forum.

[Control-Z]

32. It seem wrong to be inviting

people into a group. It's like they (groups) have become a franchise of DU with private ownership.

[Violet_Crumble]

33. This probably sounds lame, but I don't think people should give up...

Last edited Sat Jun 23, 2012, 03:25 AM - Edit history (1)

I think there was a bit of deliberate sabotage by one* person in that thread in the Feminists group to try to undermine Yardwork, so please let's not let that colour our impression of things.

Let's try to go forward where we're working towards a future where this group and the Feminists group are working together, and not seeing things as 'us and them' and 'they suck but we don't!'. That divisiveness sucks so much, and if we can welcome participants in the Feminists Group and they welcome us, the only losers out of the whole thing are the misogynistic types who thrive on us all not getting along...

*on edit - I'm going to add someone else to that list now...

[Little Star]

36. Violet, the more I think about this whole thing...

of how our lead host here at HoF was not given a invite. How other members here at HoF were not given a invite.
What does that say?
What sense does that make?

They offer a olive branch to some yet "hold old grudges" against others?

Please explain to me how the way the gesture was made will heal anything? I don't get it????

Start a new beginning with some, yet hold your own bias judgment against others of us here at HoF. That in itself is just a wrong headed way to hold out an olive branch.

For me, the more time I have to think through the way, each part of that process played out last night, the more angry I become. It starts with what seems to be a very nice welcome and then it becomes clear that even that is not really nice to all of us and certainly not a way to begin anew.

[hlthe2b]

40. That is disturbing to me as well... It should have been a posted invitation to the group

and certainly should have gone through all the hosts.

Whether intentional or not, this slight has resulted in more hard feelings. But, it seems clear that it has also awakened some internecine bitterness within their group as well.

I don't think anyone should take a desire for a "calming of the waters" as anything more than that. Being open to finding a more peaceful coexistence does not equate to naive expectations.

I'm proud of our group, the direction Bostonbean--aided by all of you--has worked hard to establish and that will be where I continue my focus.

[Little Star]

42. As long as no one accidentally throws the baby out with the..

bath water while trying to calm it. lol

Remember the thread in here, where someone asked about host elections here? Most of us expressed we were not ready to hold elections because we need the strong women we have right now as our hosts. This group still needs protection and right now I don't see anyone who could do the hard job you guys have been handling.

These type issues are when we really need you guys working to protect our group. I just want to say thank you to you guys for being there for us and I know that out there in DUland it makes you guys targets sometimes. We still very much need and appreciate you.

[sufrommich]

43. +1. Our hosts do an outstanding job.

[hlthe2b]

47. Much appreciated comments... thank you.

[Hatchling]

54. Hell, if we had elections.

We'd just vote you three back in anyway. Three strong sensible women with a clear vision for this group; who could ask for more at this junture in time?

[seabeyond]

59. all admirable and i applaud. another perspective most are not aware of. our hosts are there

for those of us that are being personally and continuously attacked. it does not feel good to be called out. and the many times, every time the hosts are there spending time that can be used in other manners, in RL, being supportive and strength to the one being attacked. i cannot tell you how valuable that is when being in that position. they are always the first, often clueing me in, to say.... all is fine. that, i appreciate it and value so much. that if you are not in the line of fire, you do not even know what these women are doing.

i could not agree with you more little star. and beyond.

and yes.... all those in this forum that support the people that need them. a blessing. true blessing. and much needed. thank you.

[Texasgal]

41. Demanding aplogies

from people is wrong and dosen't have the feel of trying to foster friendly relationships between either group.

I'm not going to apologize, I've done nothing wrong. I still disagree how all that was handled. Many simple bystanders were screwed over by that whole coup and we did nothing to deserve that. We had no say in the matter. Basically, the bystanders were left with choosing sides or opting out all together.

I have no problem with anyone in that group, but I'm not getting a warm fuzzy from some of them. Why in the world would I want to go through that hell again?

If anything, we bystanders should have an apology far as I am concerned.

[BlueIris]

35. I like it here.

And the other forum has been broken beyond all repair.

[sufrommich]

44. I just finished reading that vile thread in Meta.

I'm going to be honest here, I have no interest in sharing a feminist forum with anybody who took part in the hateful,brutal,repulsive lesson on how to be a bully on the internet piece of shit thread. Sorry,I can't go there. I feel like I need a shower now.

[Little Star]

45. It's almost 400 posts long attacking not only our group as a whole..

but going after individual members of our group. Your right it is the blueprint for how to be a (gang of bullies) on the internet piece of shit thread.

Plus, yardwork should have cleaned up and set up her own place before inviting anyone to go there. I think that was one of her mistakes.

I wish them no ill will and hope they have a successful group but I have no desire to be involved with people who can't move on and just want to keep beating a dead horse.

[Scout]

53. just to clarify, i am not at all knocking yardwork in any of my messages.

i don't have a problem with the invite.

ok wait, now that i've realized not everyone got the invite, i do have a problem. it should have been posted/sent to the whole group, or none.