True, true.. I remember how united we Americans all were during the Bush years.. it was one for all

and all for one!

Ah W... how you inspired and led us, united in a grand
vision of freedom, thousands of points of light, all
that stuff.

And then BOOM! Obama becomes president and
all of a sudden everyone is fighting, and cranky, going
every whichaway, no direction, shutting down the
government, shooting up schools, marrying gay people,
taking Krokodil ..

the other side of that.. when people live lives of cheat and deceit

They become frightened people.
It is a terrifying way to live, as a liar.

It invokes an unconscious terror.
People may be cheery and bold on
the outside, but there is gnawing
unease, disease, for liars.

Truth itself becomes frightening. Dark vague
shadows, made of lies, haunt the psyche.

The drug for fear is religion.

Put all the responsibiilty on a God of
one's own invention.

Then you don't have to face yourself.

They don't get the concept of natural law,
karma.

Looking for the name of a film I saw many years ago.

It's a very underground sort of film, centered around
two transgender female->male -- I am not sure the
correct way to describe them, except extraordinary --

One of them was born a little girl but seemingly
raised (very lovingly) almost as a son and grew
up identifying with the heroism of Superman.

It's a really powerful film, I saw it twice but for the
life of me can not remember the title. Any help
appreciated, and if you haven't seen it, find it.

thanks

How to tell if your dog is involved in a sex scandal (Xpost from Pets)

How to tell if your dog is involved in a sex scandal

sweet timeless story from 2012

48 hour Livecast of PeaceBeats 2013 - now through tomorrow midnight

60% of the spam is porn.

And 40% of the porn is spam.
The rest is cats.

I'm not an expert except with this one particular cat.

If both of you can be consistent and committed to
helping the cat, I think it's great. Having just one
person be in charge is good too. You guys will figure
it out.

Just be consistent in how you both respond to him.

My guy is still a little jekyll & hyde -- so I am always
careful if I sense he's grouchy. Like the change in
his meow you hear -- sometimes it's just a look or
tail twitching that tells me it's not a great time to
initiate anything.

However no matter the timing, and no matter what
his personality of the moment may be, I always responded
the same way if he scratched or bit. Even if it was
"my own fault" for trying to pet a cranky cat. NOT OK
EVER> he knows this now. He's a lovebaby now. with
an occasional relapse.

I go out of my way when he is NOT in attack
mode to pick him up and hold him and give him
pretty much the same treatment. A lot of stimulation
of the somatosensory system.

If you start getting comfortable with this approach
and he's responding, I would even challenge his
threatening attitude if it comes up -- even without
the biting -- if he is growling at me or acting threating,
I'm like: you silly little bad baby boy and now I'm
going to smother you with love too bad for you
buster and I grab his scruff and do the whole
thing. It's not exactly a system, it's just as much
love as possible as often as possible, and never
accept hostility.

He will blow you off regularly but mark my words
he'll come back for more love.

Remember also their lives are kind of boring, in many
ways, and when there is some excitement -- like
having their authority challenged -- it gets their
adrenaline going, it gets their blood flowing, and
so in a peculiar way, it is often helpful and healthy
for them to be provoked a bit, as long as you follow
through.
My hands and arms are scarred from my first year
with this cat. it has been really rewarding to see
him soften up.

I've been working for the past two years with an aggressive cat. The transformation is phenomenal.

The secret has been a lot of strong physical dominance
combined with VERY physical affection.. strong massage,
immobilizing him with one hand as a mother cat would
do, firmly massaging petting loving all over the body.

There's a biology behind why this works. I understand
only the gist. It has to do with the somatosensory
system.

The psychology of it is: he did not get the mothering
physical and emotional that would give him a sense that
the world is a safe place. He was born on high alert,
immediately stressed, and soon abandoned.

Without the mother nursing, and stimulating the body,
mammals' brains don't fully develop. They are highly
prone to depression, hostility, aggression, illness, etc.
It is hardly different for a cat than for a human, in
that sense.

I made it very clear with this cat that biting and
scratching me was a VERY BAD IDEA. As soon as it
would happen, or starts to happen, I grabbed him
by the scruff of the neck, and made it impossible
for him to do any further damage.

But then I held him close to my body and kept him
there, as long as it took for him to calm down and
(more or less) surrender.

When I am holding him (against his will) I massage
and pet him all over, especially around the face and
ears. I speak lovingly to him and explain in simple
terms that I am not his enemy.
I massage him and give him a ton of love.

Then I put him down firmly, and release him
with firm touch all the way to his tail. I don't
allow a hasty departure. Next time he is aggressive,
same thing. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

I never punished him and rarely scolded, though I have
screamed in pain (in the beginning, not any more)
& he got the message.

He has no choice in any of this. Since I am feeding
him I require his cooperation. He sees I am more
powerful than he is, and indispensible not only
because of food -- but he has learned there is a great
deal of pleasure and fun to be had, if he is on
my good side.

A loving but DOMINATING response to aggressiveness
works, has worked. He has become so affectionate,
and playful. He still slips once in a while, but he
always stops himself before he hurts me. It's a
knee jerk reaction from when he didn't have a
person and he had to always be on high alert.

Now he must submit to me. I am his momma cat
and his person... I don't take no shit. I love him to
pieces.

Whenever there is a difficult creature of any kind,
human or not, my first assumption is this: they
need more love. More holding. More patience.
So many damaged creatures on the earth at this
time.

good luck!!! don't give up!!
It's a project and a commitment but inside every
mean aggressive cat is a little kitten who only wants
his momma, and to have fun.

My advice is either you or wife take charge of this cat
and don't let up. Be proactive about it. Seek the cat out
for interaction. Every time he responds aggressively
do the love thing. Hold him a lot. Massage him
firmly a lot. Be his, but seriously be the boss. Scruff of the neck
is a wonderful secret. Not only for holding and
immobilizing, but deep gentle rhymic massage in that
area. An aggressive cat is afraid. Make him feel safe.
Pleasurable physical stimulation all over his body
is key. It has long-term effect, not just immediate.