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The Velveteen Ocelot

(117,522 posts)
68. Any or all of the above, or some combination, would work for me.
Sun Feb 4, 2018, 12:32 PM
Feb 2018

My favorite fate-of-Trump fantasy has him dead broke and living alone in a run-down double-wide in a seedy trailer park somewhere in, say, Nebraska, where it gets very hot in the summer, cold in the winter, and is susceptible to tornadoes. He spends his days sitting on the steps of his humble home drinking diet Pepsi, eating KFC and railing about the injustices done to him. He has become dangerously obese; his old clothes no longer fit so most of the time he wears XXX-L sweat pants and a stained wife-beater undershirt adorned with a six-foot-long red polyester necktie. Because he is no longer able to manage his hairdo, his fringe of stringy, now-gray hair hangs almost to his shoulders, revealing his shiny, blotchy scalp. His neck wattles obscure his actual neck almost entirely.

He is living off proceeds from the sale of some items of personal property that Melania missed when she cleaned out the New York apartment and took off for Slovenia; these included several sets of monogrammed gold cufflinks and a roomful of dictator-Baroque gilded chairs. He kept the throniest-looking chair to sit in at night while he watches Fox News on a small, very old tv with a coat hanger for an antenna, hoping Sean Hannity will mention him. He never does. Don Jr. sometimes writes to him from prison but the rest of his family is in Brazil, which does not have an extradition treaty with the U.S., and he hasn't heard from them in months.

He wonders what he will do when he has sold the last set of cufflinks. The pawn shop owner is not very generous, and the only collectors who might be interested are those unemployed neckbeards who live in their parents' basements and collect knockoff Nazi memorabilia.

Sometimes he waddles over to the neighbors' trash bins and pokes around in them with a stick, never with his little hands, hoping to find a copy of the New York Times or the Washington Post that might have an article about him. He wonders if Maggie Haberman still writes about him. Since his neighbors do not subscribe to these newspapers, he is able to imagine that his name still appears in them from time to time. Sometimes he finds uneaten French fries in the bins, which is a nice bonus when it happens, but most of the time the neighbors chase him away.

The worst thing of all is that Vladimir Putin no longer takes his calls.

Any of the above. Freedomofspeech Feb 2018 #1
ALL of the above (in no particular order). Buns_of_Fire Feb 2018 #8
In prison for treason TEB Feb 2018 #2
+1000 Le Gaucher Feb 2018 #3
...and executed for it... ooky Feb 2018 #66
If convicted of treason TEB Feb 2018 #70
I have little doubt he has committed treason. I have no doubt he has treason in his heart. ooky Feb 2018 #86
I'd like to throw his BFFs Alex Jones and Sean Hannity in there with him. Initech Feb 2018 #89
6) Convicted of RICO violations PJMcK Feb 2018 #4
any of them except #5..if he drops dead we have to sit thru a.. samnsara Feb 2018 #5
Treason and prison janterry Feb 2018 #6
1 or 2 Freddie Feb 2018 #7
" " " " n/t MBS Feb 2018 #12
Another problem: the renaming frenzy that would occur. Buns_of_Fire Feb 2018 #14
You win the thread. n/t rzemanfl Feb 2018 #18
Ugh didn't think of that Freddie Feb 2018 #21
Good for you! MyOwnPeace Feb 2018 #25
I agree. I never refer to it as anything but Washington National Airport Glorfindel Feb 2018 #28
Didn't they try to rename O'Hare after raygun? SonofDonald Feb 2018 #50
And they'd put his likeness frogmarch Feb 2018 #72
He won't be impeached with the corrupt GOP Congress thus 2-6 work for me. Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #9
Quickly nt Xipe Totec Feb 2018 #10
You beat me to it California_Republic Feb 2018 #67
Add Trump loses his buildings and money. no_hypocrisy Feb 2018 #11
All 6 are great but realistically he needs to be voted out.. noel1237 Feb 2018 #13
All five, check the numbering. Welcome to DU. n/t rzemanfl Feb 2018 #17
Welcome. But you don't think this is a SPECIAL case? Hortensis Feb 2018 #31
thanks for the welcome. 60 votes in the Senate are needed to impeach and Republicans aren't going noel1237 Feb 2018 #39
That may turn out to be the case. One of those who Hortensis Feb 2018 #42
senate does not vote on impeachment. drray23 Feb 2018 #49
Timing might be a factor. LiberalFighter Feb 2018 #61
House impeaches, and 67 votes are needed in the Senate to convict. nt tblue37 Feb 2018 #120
Just tell him that there is a secret clause that allows shooting an impeached President LiberalFighter Feb 2018 #58
... with a whimper. JustABozoOnThisBus Feb 2018 #15
If you posted this as a poll the numbering would be correct. rzemanfl Feb 2018 #16
Um, soon! Like tomorrow. That's how. kydo Feb 2018 #19
#6 never occurred to me. I choose that! Vinca Feb 2018 #20
I kind of like that one too, although I think it would be better if both of his smirkymonkey Feb 2018 #22
I like 4 treestar Feb 2018 #23
Thats whats called The Yanukovych Tommy_Carcetti Feb 2018 #93
7) Quickly. lastlib Feb 2018 #24
And to add #5 to your list TexasTowelie Feb 2018 #41
Oh, YEAHHH! lastlib Feb 2018 #116
I don't care what direction his toes are pointing to when he leaves. Siwsan Feb 2018 #26
Anything that includes MyOwnPeace Feb 2018 #27
7) Stardust1 Feb 2018 #29
...ASAP spanone Feb 2018 #30
Yes....that is the answer..tomorrow if possible. Stuart G Feb 2018 #119
God and Karma.. HipChick Feb 2018 #32
I want him to resign, get a heart attack getting into his private plane, fly to FL to recover then wasupaloopa Feb 2018 #33
Something that involves "His judgement cometh and that right soon" Dread Pirate Roberts Feb 2018 #34
Add one (7): Lee Harvey Oswald II bumps him off while he's KPN Feb 2018 #35
As previously discussed, I would like to see him stoke out on live TV Orrex Feb 2018 #36
If he has it on the golf course, is the stroke added to his score? LastLiberal in PalmSprings Feb 2018 #71
How that terrible post survived a jury I'll never know Orrex Feb 2018 #75
The final days... N_E_1 for Tennis Feb 2018 #37
An avalanche of Big Macs superpatriotman Feb 2018 #38
Or this - with Big Macs! MyOwnPeace Feb 2018 #65
I like # 5 Hayduke Bomgarte Feb 2018 #40
Firing squad. gibraltar72 Feb 2018 #43
prolly should delete that..... lindysalsagal Feb 2018 #105
Rosenbergs died for less. gibraltar72 Feb 2018 #109
I can't articulate it properly reflection Feb 2018 #44
Impeached, removed from office, tried in a court of law, sentenced to death WhiskaBiscuit Feb 2018 #45
As long as it's immediately, I'm VERY flexible. n/t DFW Feb 2018 #46
#7 enid602 Feb 2018 #47
ASAP femmocrat Feb 2018 #48
Any way that reveals to his ardent supporters that he committed treason chuckstevens Feb 2018 #51
Exactly nini Feb 2018 #79
Is this a trick question? Ferrets are Cool Feb 2018 #52
Yes. The sooner, the better. GoCubsGo Feb 2018 #113
Devil's Island. Sneederbunk Feb 2018 #53
An old school Frog March with the orange one peeing his pants Brother Buzz Feb 2018 #54
Not with a bang but a whimper. tanyev Feb 2018 #55
I would like him to have a mental breakdown and spill the beans during a public speech. Doodley Feb 2018 #56
All and more. LiberalFighter Feb 2018 #57
Video leaks out with Trump and all his top people marlakay Feb 2018 #59
I like your ending.... Pachamama Feb 2018 #64
The quickest way possible. Yo_Mama_Been_Loggin Feb 2018 #60
Ending number #3 that is missing.... Pachamama Feb 2018 #62
with a guillotine. n/t Horse with no Name Feb 2018 #63
Any or all of the above, or some combination, would work for me. The Velveteen Ocelot Feb 2018 #68
Not with a bang but a whimper--from Trump and his spoiled offspring. nt tblue37 Feb 2018 #69
Quickly. MontanaMama Feb 2018 #73
Trump has massive stroke rock Feb 2018 #74
now OhNo-Really Feb 2018 #76
Broke. NT Bleacher Creature Feb 2018 #77
#5 50 Shades Of Blue Feb 2018 #78
QUICKLY elleng Feb 2018 #80
Quickly and Soon. MineralMan Feb 2018 #81
Quickly and with maximum shame hopeforchange2008 Feb 2018 #82
Very soon msdogi Feb 2018 #83
Don't for fumigation of our White House WhiteTara Feb 2018 #84
Slowly, with disgrace brought upon the entire Republican party along the way. mia Feb 2018 #85
With the Trump family's heads on a spike. . . DinahMoeHum Feb 2018 #87
5 or 6 beaglelover Feb 2018 #88
I like number (2) louis c Feb 2018 #90
Perp walk him out of the White House Jake2413 Feb 2018 #91
Anyone of these options will do.. but would like to see he and his ilk penniless Thekaspervote Feb 2018 #92
Any of the six work, but Id personally like to see... Tommy_Carcetti Feb 2018 #94
Guantanimo ollie10 Feb 2018 #95
ASAP. n/t Different Drummer Feb 2018 #96
At the bottom of a high, curving staircase; Dashed, like so many hopes, Sugar Smack Feb 2018 #97
1. I want a trial, the optics...History recording....EVERYTHING. n/t Kirk Lover Feb 2018 #98
Oh- yeah! lindysalsagal Feb 2018 #108
With him broke, disgraced and irrelevent to the media DeminPennswoods Feb 2018 #99
The Trump family shackled together in a chain gang Downtown Hound Feb 2018 #100
I want it to end this way! TheDebbieDee Feb 2018 #101
In flames. H2O Man Feb 2018 #102
Put the clan under collective house arrest so they can spend LOTS of quality time together..... lindysalsagal Feb 2018 #103
With him and his crime family syndicate kennetha Feb 2018 #104
Immediately. yellerpup Feb 2018 #106
I just don't his presidency to end...I want him destroyed nini Feb 2018 #107
Yes!!!!! Pachamama Feb 2018 #110
yea make him eat salads only nini Feb 2018 #114
After his conviction, I want his head shaved on national TV mnhtnbb Feb 2018 #112
I so want to see him humiliated for the rest of his pathetic life nini Feb 2018 #115
6) Melania Stabs him to death. .. OR ... I turn into a Vampire and bite him trueblue2007 Feb 2018 #111
Message auto-removed Name removed Feb 2018 #117
Walk the plank off the top of his own tower OxQQme Feb 2018 #118
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