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rainin

(3,246 posts)

109. To those who don't understand those of us who wouldn't allow the gun

Sat Feb 17, 2018, 10:10 AM

Feb 2018

Perhaps substitute a gang banger, or a drug addicted friend, or 10 guns, all legal. If you won't say no to any legal action, however threatening, I think you are an enabler not a helper and you bear responsibility for the consequences.

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The family who took him in. [View all] grantcart Feb 2018 OP

Sorry. He was troubled and had a gun. He should never have had a gun. Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #1

Who is arguing he should have had a gun? LanternWaste Feb 2018 #2

The family knew he had a gun and were ok with it. robbob Feb 2018 #39

They knew his mother let him have it, but they insisted it go in a locked box. pnwmom Feb 2018 #45

I wouldn't have allowed him in my house with a gun, even if it was locked up. politicaljunkie41910 Feb 2018 #54

I wouldn't have wanted a gun in my house either. But that's not the point. pnwmom Feb 2018 #94

They knew he was a risk...and I do blame them. He should not have had a gun...and Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #92

Did they monitor his social media? Almost all 19 year olds know a lot more about social media pnwmom Feb 2018 #93

I don't know. It just seems that by allowing him access to the gun, they were a part of it. Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #95

Good for you for trying! pnwmom Feb 2018 #97

I do try. I have had a number of kids live with me. I think it is a terrible thing that kids are Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #98

The family who took him in allowed him a gun and gave him a key to the gun lockbox. Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #91

Fair statement, but what does this have to do with the OP? Sailor65x1 Feb 2018 #8

I find the idea they didn't know he was violent questionable Egnever Feb 2018 #21

Hijacking the thread? You want to praise the people that did 'a good thing' and took him in...I Demsrule86 Feb 2018 #90

There were some pretty Old Testament pronouncements being laid at the father's feet. LanternWaste Feb 2018 #3

They didnt know about the machetes and hows he had threatened kids with them? bettyellen Feb 2018 #4

Likely not. B2G Feb 2018 #6

Without hearing about why he was kicked out of school? I think Id want to know. bettyellen Feb 2018 #9

Kids lie. B2G Feb 2018 #11

You think if they were taking him in heir home theyd take steps to find out. All the kids seemed to bettyellen Feb 2018 #12

What steps? pnwmom Feb 2018 #46

Finding out what it takes to get kicked out of that school, for starters... bettyellen Feb 2018 #65

The school couldn't tell them -- that's covered by privacy laws. The boy's parents weren't pnwmom Feb 2018 #69

Its easily googlable these days. He had lived with friends of the moms for a while- Im sure they bettyellen Feb 2018 #72

And they let him have a gun in his room in a lockbox, with him having the keys. LisaL Feb 2018 #106

At 19 he is an adult male. LisaL Feb 2018 #105

I don't want to put any blame on that family at this time mainstreetonce Feb 2018 #5

How would they know that? B2G Feb 2018 #7

If you let someone into your home with a gun, maybe make an effort to find out things about that LisaL Feb 2018 #108

How would they know about something that happened a year ago at school? School disciplinary matters pnwmom Feb 2018 #47

Yes, who could have anticipated that a depressed kid with a key to the gun cabinet meadowlander Feb 2018 #10

Precisely n/t gay texan Feb 2018 #17

It wasn't their gun cabinet. It was his. AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #29

Their house. hunter Feb 2018 #48

I assume they didn't fear him. AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #49

He's in their house. hunter Feb 2018 #58

No one cared enough about the many girls in that school that did fear him.... bettyellen Feb 2018 #68

There's no link between those two issues. AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #75

Id do my research on the kids history and ditch the guns as a condition of taking him in. bettyellen Feb 2018 #86

Then he'd be living somewhere else. Or on the streets. AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #87

It prevents me from endangering myself and family and not aiding a blossoming criminal. bettyellen Feb 2018 #89

A smarter compromise is that they lock the guns and allow their use on a bettyellen Feb 2018 #67

It's not an easy situation. AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #74

Then so be it: he's homeless. It's their jrthin Feb 2018 #76

Are you listening to yourself? AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #77

Yes I am. I will not let jrthin Feb 2018 #81

I'm an adoptive parent, but I will admit, the circumstances under which I adpoted were considerably AtheistCrusader Feb 2018 #83

I fully understand and appreciate your position. And jrthin Feb 2018 #84

The kid had the option of staying with the Moms friend. He wanted to call the shots and go elsewhere bettyellen Feb 2018 #85

"They're not social media people. They're parents." What the hell does that mean? Beaverhausen Feb 2018 #13

It's one thing to open your home to a stray kid. mainer Feb 2018 #14

Yet even knowing the facts sarisataka Feb 2018 #15

Ill wait until the dust settles first GWC58 Feb 2018 #18

They knew he was armed and mentally ill. They aided and abetted samir.g Feb 2018 #16

Your assertion that they knew he was "mentally ill" is fabricated. grantcart Feb 2018 #19

Do you like making stuff up? Kaleva Feb 2018 #23

"depressed" "troubled" ""had been dealing with mental health issues" "worried he was violent" samir.g Feb 2018 #24

I'm a certified Mental Health First Aider Kaleva Feb 2018 #43

False reasoning. You dont need a diaganosis to know a withdrawn and depressed kid and AK 15 are a bettyellen Feb 2018 #110

ANYBODY with an AR-15 is a bad idea. Kaleva Feb 2018 #111

And a depressed kid with an AK-15 is not who you rely on to make these decisions bettyellen Feb 2018 #112

No, we ought to be able to decide that the AR-15 isn't fit for anyone Kaleva Feb 2018 #113

You got that right. Its insane. bettyellen Feb 2018 #114

You are clueless. n.t USALiberal Feb 2018 #57

We absolutely do not know anything. You cant even trust half Oneironaut Feb 2018 #79

...I feel a rant coming on... FirstLight Feb 2018 #20

I don't have words renate Feb 2018 #22

... FirstLight Feb 2018 #26

This . . . Meanwhile I wait for the psych referral to come through" Sophia4 Feb 2018 #28

Thank you for sharing your MontanaMama Feb 2018 #35

This message was self-deleted by its author BannonsLiver Feb 2018 #51

I'm so sorry that you're going through this. You're doing everything right, IMO. ecstatic Feb 2018 #52

Thank you for everything you are doing. Tatiana Feb 2018 #53

That's what's happening in your case but they claim he was depressed but never saw agggression lunasun Feb 2018 #55

He was in counseling, but he stopped going a year ago. nt tblue37 Feb 2018 #70

Im so sorry youre going through this, grateful youre handling it so well. bettyellen Feb 2018 #73

If we should profile, monitor, and disarm people with violent rage issues and mental instability IronLionZion Feb 2018 #25

++++++Agree lunasun Feb 2018 #56

He had only lived with them 2 weeks. B2G Feb 2018 #27

as a fosetr child myself, I concur gopiscrap Feb 2018 #30

I want to add just one thing ProudLib72 Feb 2018 #31

truth FirstLight Feb 2018 #32

They didn't take him in a year ago. B2G Feb 2018 #33

Ok, that makes the point even stronger ProudLib72 Feb 2018 #42

"Nikolas was adopted at birth by Lynda Cruz and her husband" IronLionZion Feb 2018 #63

Yes. Or B2G Feb 2018 #64

His issues started long before his adoptive mother died. LisaL Feb 2018 #107

The Cruzes adopted him and his brother as babies. He adoptive father tblue37 Feb 2018 #71

The family's son was at the school when it happened. BigmanPigman Feb 2018 #34

And yet they allowed him to keep his gun in a locked box IN HIS ROOM !!! ananda Feb 2018 #36

Not Feeling The EXCUSES..... LovingA2andMI Feb 2018 #37

Wow, some of you people are just awful hueymahl Feb 2018 #38

Not so much attacking the family... robbob Feb 2018 #41

Or the post attacking the dead father ..including lock him up ! Real mob mentality lunasun Feb 2018 #59

At 19 he is an adult. LisaL Feb 2018 #100

I don't blame this family for anything. IluvPitties Feb 2018 #40

I think they were doing a good thing helping out someone who needed it kcr Feb 2018 #44

I have a huge problem with them allowing him to have a gun JI7 Feb 2018 #50

He was an adult who legally owned a gun Azathoth Feb 2018 #60

They couldn't steal his gun but certainly they were not obligated to allow him into their home with LisaL Feb 2018 #101

They didn't give him any weapons, correct? yardwork Feb 2018 #61

sounded like the area where the kid lived was more rural...hunting happens, guns are normal dembotoz Feb 2018 #62

His adoptive mother was only single because she was widowed. Her husband, the boy's adoptive father, tblue37 Feb 2018 #66

I understood it was his natural father who died of a heart attack 10 years ago grantcart Feb 2018 #88

No, adoptive father. LisaL Feb 2018 #99

There is no way he was presenting as a normal young man. Maybe they just didn't care. And who SweetieD Feb 2018 #78

A kid still in school gets to be called an ophan if his last aprent dies obamanut2012 Feb 2018 #80

His adoptive mother died after he was kicked out of school. He is not an orphan and SweetieD Feb 2018 #82

Wait a minute: janx Feb 2018 #96

That's what I find so bizarre. LisaL Feb 2018 #104

Asshole WestIndianArchie Feb 2018 #102

I applaud this family handmade34 Feb 2018 #103

To those who don't understand those of us who wouldn't allow the gun rainin Feb 2018 #109