How do we deal with dangerous teens when NOBODY will help? (long rant of a mom over the edge) :(

[Lee-Lee]

9. I dont know what state you are in so laws vary but here are a few things

Last edited Thu Feb 22, 2018, 09:04 AM - Edit history (1)

First, you can’t do this alone. You can’t “fix” him alone. And none of this is your fault. It’s brain chemistry that is off in some people. Absolutely do not let yourself feel like a failure for doing what must be done when is seems like there are no good options. At this point you need to do what is best for your family as a whole and for society, and while he won’t like it in the long run it is what’s best for him as well.

You need to first start documenting everything. In detail. This may come in handy later.

Since he is a minor, you have the power and authority to have him involuntarily committed for a psychological evaluation. Write down as much of his behavior as you can so that you have it all clear in your mind when you talk to the doctors when you do this.

Do not wait for a walk-in evaluation. Those things are backed up and often insufficient. Do a full involuntarily commitment with a 72 hour hold. That will get him seem right away. If your state is anything like NC get it done not going over a weekend to get the best results, if you can time it well.

Second, you mentioned him destroying things. You can and at this point call the police when that happens and have him charged. Depending on your state what the charge is will vary, in some that is enough for domestic violence in others it is less. Don’t worry about harming his future, a juvenile record will end up sealed when he is 18. But it serves to send an indication to the courts and the mental health system of his issues and makes it easier to get him the help he needs.

So if you are at the point now of trying to decide what to do with him if you go pick him up, call the hospital and as them what the procedure is for an involuntary commitment of a minor and how you get that going. The threatened suicide along with the past history should be enough. And get that process started so that you can take him right to the hospital or other facility.

Going forward I would suggest downloading a ln app to your phone that will serve as a voice recorded. Having his displays of suicidal ideation or rage recorded will help in describing them to then doctors or if need be to the courts.

Lastly make sure that when you get a diagnosis you petition the court to have that diagnosis adjudicated and his name sent to NICS as a prohibited person before he turns 18.

This is the hardest thing any parent will have to deal with, short of the death of a child. I applaud you for your strength so far and your wisdom in seeing that he needs the help and your strength in reaching out to others.