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FirstLight

(13,352 posts)
28. UPDATE: STILL FUCKED
Thu Feb 22, 2018, 09:32 PM
Feb 2018

I appreciate your advice and many of the things you suggest I have already done. I have talked to NAMI reps in the area, called CPS even to ask if I could put him in foster care myself, checked area hospitals and shelters...The closest treatment center TODAY said they had no room for him, and even then he had to be referred by a social services or other agency...if I wanted to pay out of pocket it's $18K per MONTH!!!!

So the probation dept tried to get this taken to court to make him a ward of the court but the DA rejected it because he was only caught "under the influence"
(apparently the hammer under the bed never made it to the police report? or nobody gives a damn?...but in MY book that is intent to harm)

They told me they cannot hold him so I'd have to get him today...unless I want it turned over to CPS custody. I said fine - maybe if he is breaking rules in another home he can't blame it on me, right?

CPS calls me and says either I pick him up or they file against ME for Child Abandonment!!! (The woman was horrible, gave me no understanding, told me to be quiet when I started to cry and say I have been begging for help for MONTHS, and then said my daughter's safety isn't the issue...wtf?
she said if he comes home and gets violent, call the cops. (nice, easy, thanks, I wouldn't have thought of that))
She said "we can't just take kids from their parents..." I thought: um, isn't that what you guys DO? she said "what if your daughter was walking down the street and I thought ...there's a cute girl, I have a foster family she'd be perfect for..." I hung up on her smarmy ass

So at this point I refused to go pick him up
Let them bring a case against me... she said they could send law enforcement to my house tonight and take ME into custody, which would mean they'd have to take my daughter as well... (um, isn't that what you guys DO?)

So me and my daughter figure we're going to go OUT to dinner, they can't arrest us if we're not home right?

I've gone through the 5 stages of fucking grief all day today...and now I've reached ANGER.

~ ~ ~

updateupdate...Juvey called one last time and finally convinced me to come get him. Because if this goes to CPS it is no longer about HIS behavior but it's against MINE and I am the one that has to EARN back MY parental RIGHTS.
I tell you, If I end up dead...you guys know why

I am so, so, so sorry that you are dealing with this renate Feb 2018 #1
oh yeah...been there too FirstLight Feb 2018 #4
I don't know how to help, but I wish you and your family (incl. your son) all the best Ezior Feb 2018 #2
My son MFM008 Feb 2018 #3
You might want to cross post in this Group: Rhiannon12866 Feb 2018 #5
I am so sorry for any parent who has to go through this. What state are you in, pnwmom Feb 2018 #6
National Alliance on Mental Illness Louis1895 Feb 2018 #7
Thank-you for sharing your story - and pointing out a huge problem in our society. Chemisse Feb 2018 #8
I dont know what state you are in so laws vary but here are a few things Lee-Lee Feb 2018 #9
This seems like great advice. eom Tipperary Feb 2018 #15
been there still there turnitup Feb 2018 #10
You say you're waiting on a mental health referral -- who are you waiting on? If you have an EAP WhiskeyGrinder Feb 2018 #11
In the situation she described a 72 hour involuntarily commitment is the best path Lee-Lee Feb 2018 #13
Oppositional defiance, maybe? Has he always been like this, GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #12
hugs and peace to you! logosoco Feb 2018 #14
Oppositional Defiance Disorder MichMary Feb 2018 #16
I did some Googling-- MichMary Feb 2018 #17
Add to this a very helpful odd site GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #18
And a search for odd support GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #19
Very good. Glad there are resources, MichMary Feb 2018 #20
It takes we odd kids a lonnngggg time to grow up. GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #23
It's just mental illness Calculating Feb 2018 #21
I'm so sorry you are in that situation. MineralMan Feb 2018 #22
My sister went through the same thing with my nephew. B2G Feb 2018 #24
Really sorry you're having to go through this bluecollar2 Feb 2018 #25
"actually DO something" He did do several things already samir.g Feb 2018 #26
I am truly sorry handmade34 Feb 2018 #27
UPDATE: STILL FUCKED FirstLight Feb 2018 #28
Oh, Lord! I am so very sorry! *huge hug* GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #29
Maybe it's time to pull out the big guns bluecollar2 Feb 2018 #30
+1 GreenPartyVoter Feb 2018 #32
I would agree, there should be some resource for assistance. kentuck Feb 2018 #31
Hey...you Ok? N/t bluecollar2 Feb 2018 #33
Extended Update... Take a deep Breath, Momma FirstLight Feb 2018 #34
This message was self-deleted by its author lostnfound Mar 2018 #35
I have so much to say/// FirstLight Mar 2018 #36
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