General Discussion

nolabear

(43,850 posts)

11. Take heart. All these things are true.

Reply to TeapotInATempest (Original post)

Fri Sep 28, 2018, 03:04 PM

Sep 2018

The things that happened to you happened, as they did to so many of us. But so did all those wonderful things you’ve done and the wonderful people you’ve known and even made!

All the things you’re hearing about the ways memories are stored and retrieved, and the emotional weight that they carry, are smart. That’s what you’re in the middle of. First, the need to be untouchable and then the fear of the collapse of that protection. It’s how you handled memories. And it’s changing. That change is a miserable thing to go through, but it has the potential to help you grow rather than freeze you in an untouchable, but perhaps less potent, state.

This sounds far more easy and Pollyanna than it is. The medium is hard. But I appreciate and support what you’re going through.

Click here to purchase valentine hearts!

Edit history

Please sign in to view edit histories.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

170 replies

= new reply since forum marked as read

Highlight:

I didn't know this week would have this effect on me. Can anyone relate? [View all] TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 OP

It has, in a single word, been DEVASTATING hlthe2b Sep 2018 #1

On behalf of my gender, I'm sorry ... mr_lebowski Sep 2018 #2

+1. n/t rzemanfl Sep 2018 #5

You canetoad Sep 2018 #54

+2 Lochloosa Sep 2018 #12

+3 philly_bob Sep 2018 #16

Thank you. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #17

What you said. wryter2000 Sep 2018 #87

I apologized once... Beartracks Sep 2018 #165

+1 geardaddy Sep 2018 #62

That's good of you wryter2000 Sep 2018 #83

I've been totally distracted wryter2000 Sep 2018 #84

I'd like to see a chart TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #93

Women buying into rape culture: When i was about 16, my mom and I saw a woman who was Amaryllis Sep 2018 #135

Thanks for expressing that so eloquently. KY_EnviroGuy Sep 2018 #142

Well put wryter2000 Sep 2018 #155

Yes, empathy accompanied by action! n/t KY_EnviroGuy Sep 2018 #156

So many women are or have been experiencing this since 2016 and yeah.... bettyellen Sep 2018 #3

Please accept my hugs. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #27

Accepted. And it was lovely seeing the support shared and raw honesty of bettyellen Sep 2018 #32

I could not sleep last night. True Blue American Sep 2018 #82

same here in terms of being devastated Fresh_Start Sep 2018 #4

You are not damaged True Blue American Sep 2018 #88

I think this has re-traumatized women all over this country. Haggis for Breakfast Sep 2018 #122

Calls to the Abuse hotline have increased True Blue American Sep 2018 #152

Wow! I tip my hat to you. I am in total solidarity. alwaysinasnit Sep 2018 #6

I can relate. Solly Mack Sep 2018 #7

Yes, like some expert said on some show TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #30

Exactly right. Solly Mack Sep 2018 #38

Dear Solly Mack Haggis for Breakfast Sep 2018 #123

Thank you, Haggis for Breakfast Solly Mack Sep 2018 #124

I would give you the biggest hug right now. Haggis for Breakfast Sep 2018 #136

You have no reason to apologize. Speak out loud and clear True Blue American Sep 2018 #154

Welcome to the club. fierywoman Sep 2018 #8

I have literally lived my life by that saying. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #34

Yup. I know the tiredness. Rest, nap, recuperate -- fierywoman Sep 2018 #48

This is perfectly stated. I have been feeling as if I am carrying rocks around Squinch Sep 2018 #9

Yes, I feel exactly this way too. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #19

With you 100%. MontanaMama Sep 2018 #10

I'm sorry you feel that way, too. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #21

Take heart. All these things are true. nolabear Sep 2018 #11

Thanks you for the kind words; you've made me cry again TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #22

Absolutely. I avoided watching the proceedings, but caught occasional updates Laurian Sep 2018 #13

You aren't alone. Ohiogal Sep 2018 #14

Ugh, I'm sorry that happened to you. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #23

I guess you could say we have a rapist in the White House, too Ohiogal Sep 2018 #26

Well stated. Thank you. (nt) Paladin Sep 2018 #15

Woke up yesterday morning to find my wife crying in the living room. byronius Sep 2018 #18

You're clearly a good ally; thank you TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #24

I need to keep repeating this ismnotwasm Sep 2018 #20

Please hug your husband for me. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #25

Yes. kimmylavin Sep 2018 #28

Yes, this is how I feel! TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #37

Will do, and thank you. kimmylavin Sep 2018 #99

Yes, this resonates...but glad that you are not shutting up KSNY Sep 2018 #29

THIS. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #39

It is upsetting for me, also. haele Sep 2018 #31

I agree with every word. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #40

{{Hugs}} From a fellow survivor. I stand with you in complete solidarity. nt procon Sep 2018 #33

I can relate. Something happened to me at a party, too, decades ago. Honeycombe8 Sep 2018 #35

Hugs to you. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #42

Hugs back atcha. Yes, I felt like it was my fault. I shouldn't have been there... Honeycombe8 Sep 2018 #50

An event popped to the front of my memory this week. Vinca Sep 2018 #36

Am I a bad person for laughing TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #46

No. You aren't a bad person for laughing. Several times over the past few days, I have wished japple Sep 2018 #63

Without laughter, we might as well be dead. Vinca Sep 2018 #69

Same here ColoradoBlue Sep 2018 #41

Right? TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #47

I hear you. WE hear you. And we stand with you. Silver Gaia Sep 2018 #43

I can't imagine... TommyCelt Sep 2018 #44

same here. I feel like I am living in a country that puts its women in a place demigoddess Sep 2018 #45

I'm so sorry for your pain CanonRay Sep 2018 #49

Thanks for the kind words. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #53

I won't go into why, but Dr. Ford's testimony affected me very much. I sat there and cried as I skylucy Sep 2018 #51

Her courage amazes me. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #56

Yes. I wanted to reach into the television and hug her. Thank you for understanding my trepidation skylucy Sep 2018 #79

I've been unable to post here canetoad Sep 2018 #52

You do have a horse in the race; this is a worldwide fight. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #58

No need to apologise canetoad Sep 2018 #60

Wow, thank you, I thought it was just me. lark Sep 2018 #55

Yeah, it's just despicable. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #59

My wife and I revisited the horrors this week. Dave Starsky Sep 2018 #57

YES. SO MUCH YES. LWilliams Sep 2018 #61

Thank YOU! TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #65

Totally. LWilliams Sep 2018 #72

You're not alone, Teapot peggysue2 Sep 2018 #64

We've all been there, yes. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #66

Yes, it would peggysue2 Sep 2018 #74

You are not alone. BarbD Sep 2018 #67

Yep, he came across like a bully with an over-developed sense of entitlement. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #71

Millions of women have been violently triggered this week, or, as I pointed out... Hekate Sep 2018 #68

I do know, thanks! TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #75

I, too, started crying. The man who assaulted me when I was 19 years old was killed in a CTyankee Sep 2018 #70

It's terribly sad. And ridiculous in a so-called "civilized" society TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #76

I shared my story with a dear friend who, as a result, had his own moment of recalled memory CTyankee Sep 2018 #86

I'm so sorry. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #95

Yes, sad too, that African-Americans have to have "the talk" luvtheGWN Sep 2018 #119

My guy is dead too. Silver1 Sep 2018 #139

Thank you for writing this. Sugar Smack Sep 2018 #73

Yep. It doesn't seem right that we have to carry it with us. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #78

I just read this piece to one of my best friends Sugar Smack Sep 2018 #128

You are most definitely not alone and I really don't know any female who... Guilded Lilly Sep 2018 #77

Imagine our collective strength TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #81

Empowering well beyond our fear. Guilded Lilly Sep 2018 #90

I think you have ... kooth Sep 2018 #80

Thanks Kooth. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #89

I just increased my anti-depressant. Laffy Kat Sep 2018 #85

I've found periodic news breaks are really important. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #91

When I listen to MSNBC my wife asks if my Parkinson's is getting worse grantcart Sep 2018 #92

I have found myself "triggered" too ... Blue_playwright Sep 2018 #94

I have a feeling guilt is not uncommon. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #96

I don't feel guilty and never did. But today I felt nauseated and couldn't eat. CTyankee Sep 2018 #98

Kicked and recommended. Uncle Joe Sep 2018 #97

Thank you volstork Sep 2018 #100

Thank you! TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #101

I can relate. I've been incandescent with fury for days now The Velveteen Ocelot Sep 2018 #102

Right, you never have to be touched to be violated. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #106

I believe that part of the devastation Jakes Progress Sep 2018 #103

They are still in charge. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #107

All you gotta do Jakes Progress Sep 2018 #126

I can relate utterly and totally. Pacifist Patriot Sep 2018 #104

I am so triggered, I'm sick to my stomach. WhiteTara Sep 2018 #105

Welcome to the #MeToo movement lunatica Sep 2018 #108

With you my sister! Catamount Sep 2018 #109

K&R backtoblue Sep 2018 #110

This week seems to be unearthing the suppressed memories of assault, ... JustABozoOnThisBus Sep 2018 #111

I've found myself crying intermittently as well. I've been having overwhelming feelings of being a -Steph- Sep 2018 #112

K & R SunSeeker Sep 2018 #113

I woke up today feeling as hollow, disoriented, and defeated as I did the morning of catbyte Sep 2018 #114

Yes. I keep thinking of frogmarch Sep 2018 #115

Yes. MountCleaners Sep 2018 #116

I noticed the word shame missing from your post recentevents Sep 2018 #117

I've spent enough time feeling shame. TeapotInATempest Sep 2018 #120

I think about the boys and men who assaulted me Marthe48 Sep 2018 #118

I am sorry that you are triggered camartinwv Sep 2018 #121

"Yesterday, the whole weight of my life fell on me." pnwmom Sep 2018 #125

Absolutely. Sparkly Sep 2018 #127

You nailed it Tempest, I agree. Many of KNOW this guy! joanbarnes Sep 2018 #129

I am speechless Tribalceltic Sep 2018 #130

I was so triggered last night, I wrote this FourScore Sep 2018 #131

+1 malthaussen Sep 2018 #158

I have never been physically attacked/assaulted. Grasswire2 Sep 2018 #132

Working with a good therapist does wonders. I"ve found that different things will trigger me at Amaryllis Sep 2018 #133

OH YEEEEEESSSSSSSSS catrose Sep 2018 #134

Oh, yes. Absolutely. I've never been sexually assaulted. But I was physically abused. Texin Sep 2018 #137

Kavanaugh is my ex-husband radical noodle Sep 2018 #138

My ex husband was also a mean drunk - I left because I felt he could accidentally kill me womanofthehills Sep 2018 #159

There are so many women with these experiences radical noodle Sep 2018 #167

Fuck this week Iris Sep 2018 #140

#MeToo DesertRat Sep 2018 #141

My List Silver1 Sep 2018 #143

K&R betsuni Sep 2018 #144

Thank you seta1950 Sep 2018 #145

New here again Jersey in OKC Sep 2018 #146

Welcome back uppityperson Sep 2018 #147

Robnok Jersey in OKC Sep 2018 #148

Here We Go Again Jersey in OKC Sep 2018 #149

Dr. Ford LittleGirl Sep 2018 #150

I felt physically sick yesterday. colorado_ufo Sep 2018 #151

Just beyond furious and feeling hopeless Freddie Sep 2018 #153

YES!!!!! calimary Sep 2018 #157

It made me so, so angry. alarimer Sep 2018 #160

K&R We need to continue expressing our emotions. Guilded Lilly Sep 2018 #161

Me too. recovering_democrat Sep 2018 #162

Welcome to DU, recovering_democrat! calimary Oct 2018 #168

I'm so sorry you had those experiences Zing Zing Zingbah Sep 2018 #163

I've been in bed for two days MountCleaners Sep 2018 #164

I understand completely Daphne08 Sep 2018 #166

It's been a horrible week for me wildman76 Oct 2018 #169

thank you for your courage... samnsara Oct 2018 #170