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jcgoldie

(12,046 posts)
29. You can get anything you want...
Sat Nov 17, 2018, 01:54 AM
Nov 2018

And I, I walked over to the, to the bench there, and there is, Group W's
Where they put you if you may not be moral enough to join the army after
Committing your special crime, and there was all kinds of mean nasty ugly
Looking people on the bench there. Mother rapers. Father stabbers. Father
Rapers! Father rapers sitting right there on the bench next to me! And
They was mean and nasty and ugly and horrible crime-type guys sitting on the
Bench next to me. And the meanest, ugliest, nastiest one, the meanest
Father raper of them all, was coming over to me and he was mean and ugly
And nasty and horrible and all kind of things and he sat down next to me
And said, "Kid, what did you get?" I said, "I didn't get nothing, I had to pay
$50 and pick up the garbage." He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
There, and the hairy eyeball and all kinds of mean nasty things, till I
Said, "And creating a nuisance." And they all came back, shook my hand
And we had a great time on the bench, talkin about crime, mother stabbing
Father raping, all kinds of groovy things that we was talking about on the
Bench.

Recommendations

0 members have recommended this reply (displayed in chronological order):

Have You Ever Committed a Crime? [View all] qwlauren35 Nov 2018 OP
You'd get more response with fewer, less specific options. nt greyl Nov 2018 #1
I'll add a generic bullet. qwlauren35 Nov 2018 #3
I am in my late 40's brettdale Nov 2018 #2
I passed I can only select one crime doc03 Nov 2018 #4
Hmmm... trying to decide on this one. Adrahil Nov 2018 #5
When I was in the 3rd grade some kids encouraged me to steal a bag of M&ms. Kablooie Nov 2018 #6
i stole underwear and bra when i was 13. my mother had died and i could not talk to my dad trueblue2007 Nov 2018 #33
Maybe you should add an 'all of the above' category Snarkoleptic Nov 2018 #7
This question doesn't work. Socal31 Nov 2018 #8
Polls on DU are not anonymous. Click the "show usernames" to see how people voted. WhiskeyGrinder Nov 2018 #9
BINGO! regnaD kciN Nov 2018 #27
This is crazy thing to ask people here Laura PourMeADrink Nov 2018 #10
Is this a crime brettdale Nov 2018 #11
maybe a war crime CloudWatcher Nov 2018 #12
I Googled and found I have a criminal record! Glimmer of Hope Nov 2018 #13
Thought crime. Yep, definitely committed one of those... mwooldri Nov 2018 #14
I used to have a criminal record... mwooldri Nov 2018 #15
Good Lord jberryhill Nov 2018 #36
Worth the listen. Funny guy underpants Nov 2018 #39
Enjoy underpants Nov 2018 #40
This poll is ridiculously skewed toward the result you want melman Nov 2018 #16
All of the above? fantase56 Nov 2018 #17
FWIW - Speeding is not a "crime"; it's a civil infraction. brooklynite Nov 2018 #18
I tore the tags off a mattress once Freddie Nov 2018 #19
I have smoked pot way before my state legalized. I would have said hadn't committed a crime, Wintryjade Nov 2018 #20
Yes but I'm not confessing to anything. Marie Marie Nov 2018 #21
Have done a whole bunch of stuff but mostly in my teens and early 20's Quixote1818 Nov 2018 #22
Lawyer. I know my Miranda Rights. nt TeamPooka Nov 2018 #23
Shoplifting is a misdemeanor in cities local to me JonLP24 Nov 2018 #24
Never done drugs, don't drink, and have never stole but I am willing to give others SweetieD Nov 2018 #25
Is driving without a license a crime? TlalocW Nov 2018 #26
I've never stolen, never used any alcohol or drugs, Codeine Nov 2018 #28
You can get anything you want... jcgoldie Nov 2018 #29
Ummm ... can I just answer ... 'yes' ... to a fair number of these questions, if you mean 'ever'? mr_lebowski Nov 2018 #30
Is there an ALL of the ABOVE option.. SimpleC Nov 2018 #31
Most options apply to me. Kaleva Nov 2018 #32
I robbed a Wells Fargo bank at 383 SW Luder Rd. in Portland, Oregon on Jun 5th 2011 xor Nov 2018 #34
I stole one of those little eraser tops from the F.W.Woolworth justhanginon Nov 2018 #35
I'm not sure how this demonstrates anything, since people of all colors may respond. n/t Chemisse Nov 2018 #37
It is likely qwlauren35 Nov 2018 #41
I got caught for speeding twice, once in two different states. Blue_true Nov 2018 #38
On the list of crimes... qwlauren35 Nov 2018 #42
I had to watch those videos in Florida as part of drivers Ed. Blue_true Nov 2018 #43
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