For Those of Us with Aging Parents,

[MineralMan]

57. I just got off my daily call with my parents.

Now that my father has made up his mind, he's feeling much better about it. He's been a hard worker all his life, and his inability to continue doing things like managing their farm, etc. is the biggest issue for him. He wants to be out on the tractor working in his orchards, but realizes that he can no longer do that, and it pisses him off. It's being custom-farmed now, and that's expensive. So, it's barely breaking even financially at this point. I think that he'll probably sell it very soon so he doesn't have to think about it any more. That will be a good decision, and one I'll try to help him make. Once it's no longer his responsibility, he'll shift his attention to other things, I think.

His decision to stay put in the assisted living facility is based on his concern for my mother, who is seriously hampered by her memory issues and dementia. He wants their old life back, but realizes that's impossible, which frustrates him. Still, today and yesterday, he has seemed much calmer and less frustrated. Once he makes a decision, he sticks to it and deals with things as they are. So, that's a good thing.

A lot of family will be around over the holidays, and then I'll be flying out there in mid-January for a week. We'll get it all worked out, and things will settle into their new normal for a while. But, when you're 94, things can change quickly, and usually do. So...