Does anybody else feel the stark realization

[totodeinhere]

71. It has forced me to confront my mortality.

I believe that this is the most serious crisis of my lifetime. For the first time in my life I need to contemplate the very real possibility that I might die sometime in the next few months. I have a major underlying condition which makes me extremely vulnerable. I also recognize that even in my case there is probably statistically a reasonable chance that I might survive it. And there is a realistic chance that even though I survive it I might have to spend several weeks in the hospital. And I might need hospitalization but the hospitals might be full and might not have a bed for me. And that might mean that it would have been possible to save me if I had been able to receive good medical care. But due to overloading the hospitals there just might not be room for me and so I will die.