Teaching ate me alive

[Are_grits_groceries]

33. It finally wore me out.

In order to be effective, you have to care. The kids know when you are going through the motions. However, caring begins to eat your heart and soul as you watch what happens to the students. You do what you can and hope it helps a little.

How do you help an 8th grader who can't read? Even intense efforts in a special class would be a hard slog towards real advances.

The author is spot on about administrators that wander about in some nebulous hierarchy. If I never saw one, I would be happy. Fortunately, there were always a couple who would help. The rest were ineffective or autocratic assholes.

Parents could wear me out too. There were parents who genuinely cared and worked WITH me to help their kids. Then there were the others.

When I taught near DC, everybody thought they were important. They'd march into a conference and give some title that was supposed to awe me. I didn't care if they were the Queen of the May or Kaiser or whatever, their kids were not getting special treatment. That didn't go over well. Their kids were above the norm in every respect. They were not to be given poor grades or have their behavior corrected.

I had many memorable conferences. I never said directly what I wanted to say except for one time.
A mother came in because I dared to give her daughter a lower grade than was acceptable. The kid didn't finish or turn in a lot of her work.

I walked in and before I could even sit down she announced that she was an opera singer and would be flying to NYC. I wanted to say, "So" or "Won't your arms get tired?" i refrained.

We then went back and forth about the grade. I wasn't going to change it, and I didn't. Then she started declaring that she had talked to Mrs.Fields. That became her refrain. I was wracking my brain trying to come up with some Mrs.Fields that would affect me. I finally had enough and I said, "Which one? Totie or the one who makes the cookies?" Then she mentioned school board member. Oh, that Mrs. Fields.

My hair caught on fire. I leaned toward her and said quietly but firmly that she had crossed a line. She had given Mrs.Fields a one-sided and poor view of me. I had not been there to provide balance and had no idea how this would affect my career. I then told her if there were ramifications from this or if she ever did this sort of thing again, she would be meeting with me and my lawyers. The conference wound down quietly.
(Please don't give me chapter and verse about why I had no leg to stand on. I had no idea when I said it, but I wanted to give her something to think about.)
I never heard from her again.

I do not miss those moments. I miss the kids.