The Rs calling for unity are like people telling an abused spouse

[AnotherMother4Peace]

11. Yes - exactly. It's the old "can't you take a joke"; "what did you do wrong to cause the upset";

"just try harder"; "just be sweet" (Warren Jeff's LDS); etc. etc.

My son just told me this is an example of DARVO

From Wikipedia:

DARVO is an acronym for "deny, attack, and reverse victim and offender", a common manipulation strategy of psychological abusers.

The abuser denies the abuse ever took place, attacks the victim for attempting to hold the abuser accountable, and claims that they, the abuser, are actually the victim in the situation, thus reversing the reality of the victim and offender. This usually involves not just "playing the victim" but also victim blaming.

The acronym and the analysis it is based on are the work of the psychologist Jennifer Freyd, whose webpage links to an article explaining that the first stage of DARVO, denial, involves gaslighting.

Jennifer Freyd writes:

...I have observed that actual abusers threaten, bully and make a nightmare for anyone who holds them accountable or asks them to change their abusive behavior. This attack, intended to chill and terrify, typically includes threats of law suits, overt and covert attacks on the whistle-blower's credibility, and so on. The attack will often take the form of focusing on ridiculing the person who attempts to hold the offender accountable. [...] [T]he offender rapidly creates the impression that the abuser is the wronged one, while the victim or concerned observer is the offender. Figure and ground are completely reversed. [...] The offender is on the offense and the person attempting to hold the offender accountable is put on the defense.