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In reply to the discussion: Biden Press Secretary Jen Psaki Called Out for 'Homophobic' Tweet Mocking Lindsey Graham as 'Lady G' [View all]Behind the Aegis
(53,951 posts)I was planning on writing to you in a PM because I didn't want to kick this travesty of a thread back to the first page, but then I thought, I really should comment to you directly for others to see, to see your example. Then, others started to kick it back up, so I didn't feel like I was re-contributing to this dumpster fire of a thread.
Your response, in my opinion, exemplifies the response of a true ally to the GLBT community. You don't engage in "whataboutism", you don't 'splain' to us, you don't qualify your opinion with the caveat of "some of my best friends/family are queer", you don't deflect with "concerns" about why this topic is up for discussion or parse the nature of the word "homophobia", you don't fixate on one extremist opinion, nor do you minimize the concerns of the GLBT community because "there are more important things". No, you state your opinion in a way that is clear that the comment is homophobic, but that Psaki is highly unlikely to be homophobic. A simple apology and a concerted effort to do better in the future is what you see as the answer; I agree.
But, you go further. You lay out why what was said was homophobic and presents a real concern for how this type of language is harmful, even if the target is our "enemy." You demonstrate how gay men, in particular, are made less than by particular stereotypes. And, yes, you also point out the rank and unsurprising hypocrisy of the right-wing and their "concerns" about homophobia, as well as other -isms. In short, you embodied an "allies response" to the article.
For all the reasons I stated above, things you didn't engage in, is the exact reason I didn't post this article 7 days ago. Frankly, I just didn't have it in me to experience the rank heterosexism and casual dismissal of homophobia, which, personally, I find to be homophobic. No, I felt it better to just let it slide. Sometimes, it is better to still think, pretend, you are a gay man, then face the obviousness that really, once you walk out the room, you aren't a gay man, you are really just another faggot.
I want you to know, from the bottom of my heart, I appreciate your speaking out as an ally. I feel validated. You exemplify what it is to be an ally to the GLBT community and I am glad you are here! I hope others read your response and learn from it!