General Discussion

Bettie

(19,783 posts)

17. Very well said, but I expect that from you.

Fri Oct 12, 2012, 07:58 AM

Oct 2012

I've had a full term intrapartum death (she died during my emergency c-section two weeks past my due date) and three miscarriages. All were painful, horrible experiences and yet, I remain fully and unequivocally pro-choice.

Actually, even more strongly so since I've met so many women and men in the infant loss community. Their stories are universally heartbreaking, especially those who made the painful choice to terminate wanted pregnancies for various reasons.

The fact is, I've never known anyone to terminate a pregnancy, wanted or not, without soul searching. It isn't a decision any woman I've ever known has taken lightly. Ryan and his ilk seem to think that only they, as publicly pious men, take women's reproduction seriously.

Thanks for posting this.

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Yeah, Ryan. I remember the first ultrasound where we saw a fetal heartbeat too. [View all] Plaid Adder Oct 2012 OP

Yes...I used reason and science... Diego_Native 2012 Oct 2012 #1

I've BTDT 4 times laundry_queen Oct 2012 #2

Two kids, two ultrasounds gollygee Oct 2012 #3

And it's still pissing me off! Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #4

Wow. Thank you. CaliforniaPeggy Oct 2012 #5

Thank you, CaliforniaPeggy! Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #14

A wonderful heartfelt post..... Thank you for sharing. Tennessee Gal Oct 2012 #6

I think it is trisomy-18 that they kept telling us was "incompatible with life." Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #7

Conner is nine years old and a joy to all of us. Tennessee Gal Oct 2012 #8

You are one proud grandma! n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #9

Did it look like a bean??? nt barnabas63 Oct 2012 #10

Actually in the early stages they are vaguely kidney-bean shaped. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #11

congrats.... barnabas63 Oct 2012 #12

It's OK. The bean thing is pretty mockable. n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #13

Another DUer suggested Ryan meant a "human bean." CrispyQ Oct 2012 #41

Or perhaps Mr. Bean. n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #45

I deal with my loss by knowing it wasn't a full cooked person. Lone_Star_Dem Oct 2012 #15

It is an insult. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #16

Very well said, but I expect that from you. Bettie Oct 2012 #17

I am so sorry you had to go through all that. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #18

You're right, it is SO much more common than we think Bettie Oct 2012 #22

My grandmother passed away on September 11, 2000. But I think Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #24

That is so horrible of your MIL, and so typical of a hypocritical anti-choicer. LittlestStar Oct 2012 #52

I also hate how the adbots keep putting ads for maternity clothes on this thread. n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #19

I had a miscarriage in 1993 Robyn66 Oct 2012 #20

You were brave to try again. I am glad it worked out for you. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #21

I hear you on that Bettie Oct 2012 #23

People use the "lucky" thing about cancer too...which I eventually had to stop getting mad about Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #25

HA I had breast cancer in 2008 and heard that one too! Robyn66 Oct 2012 #26

Oh. Yeah. Because you don't really NEED that part of your body! Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #27

Yes and people who were suprized at how long it took to recover from the mastectomy Robyn66 Oct 2012 #35

@#$@%!!!!! Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #39

Then the drama about reconstruction Robyn66 Oct 2012 #49

Oh, vain my ass. It's a part of your body. Losing any part of your body is horrible. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #55

Du rec. Nt xchrom Oct 2012 #28

2 children from 5 pregnancies ibleedblue Oct 2012 #29

That is a heartbreaking story. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #32

So sorry for your losses Bettie Oct 2012 #50

. n/t porphyrian Oct 2012 #30

CalPeggy said what I was thinking, so I will just kick this for you Lucinda Oct 2012 #31

Wonderful OP, Plaid Adder. K&R. ceile Oct 2012 #33

Kicking for all the stories people have told in the replies. n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #34

Pregnancies whether planned or unplanned, wanted or unwanted... LynneSin Oct 2012 #36

My Dear Plaid. annabanana Oct 2012 #37

Thanks, annabanana. n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #46

Beautifully said. Tree-Hugger Oct 2012 #38

I am sorry for your loss, Treehugger... Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #40

What a horrible ordeal. Texasgal Oct 2012 #48

So sorry for your loss Bettie Oct 2012 #51

Go Plaidder Go! KamaAina Oct 2012 #42

Thank you, KamaAina! n/t Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #44

They support a potential life instead the living breathing woman standing in front of them. CrispyQ Oct 2012 #43

Well, you know, women do things. Things the right wing doesn't always like. Plaid Adder Oct 2012 #47

This is exactly why grave stones have "birth dates" and "death dates". Conceiving does not make you LittlestStar Oct 2012 #53

A nurse shared words of wisdom & what would happen if... ReasonableToo Oct 2012 #54