This is so sad... and so gross

[hunter]

10. My grandmother was a hoarder.

She kept every light bulb she'd ever bought, marking on the package the day she bought it and the day it burned out.

She also kept Styrofoam Big Mac boxes. Some she hid cash in, some half eaten Big Macs. In all, thousands of dollars. They boxes all had to be sorted through. Mummified Big Macs or Money!

Hoarding wasn't my grandmother's only issue. The berserker was strong in her. A few neighbors were terrified of her, balanced by neighbors who adored her and would buy her cigarettes whenever she was too paranoid to leave her house.

When my grandma had to be removed from her home by court order as a danger to herself and others she fought off the police and paramedics for many hours. Strapped to a gurney on the way to the ambulance she was still cussing up a storm and trying to bite the paramedics.

If she hadn't been a little old white lady retiree homeowner in a not-so-bad neighborhood I suspect the cops would have simply shot her.

Maybe the scariest thing in the aftermath was that my mom had removed all the guns she could find from my grandma's house years before. But clearing out the house my mom found another gun. It's likely my grandma had simply forgotten where she'd hidden it. Or maybe her better Wild West Berserker self had prevailed and she'd decided not to shoot anyone.

I'm a quarter my crazy grandma.

Modern meds are helpful.